If you’ve ever caught yourself being overly critical of your own actions, you’re not alone. It’s a common trait, but it can also be a major roadblock to success.

You see, when we’re constantly picking apart our own actions and decisions, we’re not giving ourselves room to grow and learn.

It can be hard to identify these self-critical behaviors in ourselves. But recognizing them is the first step towards overcoming them.

In this article, we’ll be taking a closer look at the 9 behaviors usually displayed by people who are overly self-critical and how it’s holding them back. It’s time to give yourself a break, don’t you think?

1) Perfectionism

Perfectionism can seem like a positive trait at first glance. After all, who wouldn’t want to do things perfectly?

But there’s a dark side to this constant pursuit of perfection which is often overlooked.

Overly self-critical people are usually perfectionists. They set unrealistically high standards for themselves and constantly feel like they’re falling short.

This constant feeling of inadequacy can be incredibly damaging. It can prevent us from celebrating our successes and moving forward because we’re too busy focusing on what could have been better.

2) Overthinking

Being overly self-critical often leads to overthinking.

I’ve been there myself, replaying situations in my mind over and over, scrutinizing every detail and wondering what I could have done differently.

For example, I once gave a presentation at work that I thought went incredibly well. But, later that night, I found myself lying awake, obsessing over one awkward pause or a single phrase I could have worded better.

This is classic overthinking. It’s exhausting and can hold us back from taking on new challenges because we’re too busy dwelling on the past.

3) Fear of failure

People who are overly self-critical have a heightened fear of failure. This fear is not just a simple concern—it can be so paralyzing that it prevents them from even attempting to achieve their goals.

Imagine June, a talented graphic designer with a passion for illustration.

Despite her skills, June is plagued by a relentless inner critic that constantly whispers doubts and fears into her mind. Whenever she considers starting a new project or submitting her work for review, June’s fear of failure grips her tightly. 

She worries incessantly about not being good enough, making mistakes, or receiving criticism from others.

As a result, she remains stuck in a cycle of self-doubt, unable to pursue her goals and share her talents with the world due to her heightened fear of failure.

4) Constant comparison

Another common behavior of overly self-critical people is constant comparison to others. They are always measuring their own achievements, looks, or skills against those of others.

Whether it’s a colleague who got a promotion, a friend who just bought a house, or even a random social media influencer leading a seemingly perfect life, the comparison never ends.

This habit can be incredibly destructive as it cultivates feelings of inadequacy and bitterness. Instead, it’s crucial to focus on your own journey and appreciate your unique strengths and accomplishments. 

5) Difficulty accepting compliments

Do you find it hard to accept compliments?

You might brush them off, downplay your achievements, or feel uncomfortable when others acknowledge your success. This is a common trait among those who are overly self-critical.

Instead of seeing the compliment as a kind acknowledgment of their work or talent, they tend to think that people are just being nice or don’t mean what they say.

This habit can undermine self-esteem and prevent positive reinforcement. It’s important to learn to graciously accept compliments, see them as the recognition they are, and allow them to boost your confidence.

6) Reluctance to celebrate success

Have you ever achieved something great but found yourself unable to celebrate it? Instead, you might focus on the next goal or task, barely pausing to acknowledge your accomplishment.

Overly self-critical individuals often struggle with this. They find it hard to relish in their success because they’re too focused on what’s next, or they believe they could have done even better.

It’s a heartbreaking reality because everyone deserves to feel proud of their achievements.

Celebrating our successes is not just about feeling good in the moment. It’s about recognizing our efforts, savoring the joy, and fueling our motivation for future endeavors.

7) Internal negative talk

We all have an inner voice. But for those who are overly self-critical, that voice can be harsh and relentless.

I remember a time when my own inner voice was my worst critic. It was constantly telling me I wasn’t good enough, smart enough, or capable enough.

This negative self-talk can be incredibly damaging. It chips away at your self-esteem, fills you with doubt, and can even lead to anxiety and depression.

The key is to recognize when this negative talk starts and to consciously choose to replace it with positive affirmations. It’s a process, but over time, you can transform that inner critic into your greatest cheerleader.

8) Difficulty asking for help

Overly self-critical individuals often have a tough time asking for help. They see it as a sign of weakness or incompetence, believing they should be able to handle everything on their own.

In reality, asking for help is a sign of strength. It shows that you recognize your limitations and are willing to learn and grow. No one is expected to know everything or be able to do everything.

If you find yourself struggling with this behavior, try to remember that everyone needs help sometimes. It’s not a reflection on your abilities or worth, but simply part of being human.

9) Ignoring self-care

Neglecting self-care is a telltale sign of overly self-critical individuals, reflecting a deeper struggle with prioritizing their own well-being.

Despite their relentless pursuit of perfection in work or caretaking roles, these individuals habitually place their own needs on the back burner.

Whether it’s skipping meals, ignoring physical or emotional discomfort, or depriving themselves of rest, their neglect of self-care perpetuates a harmful cycle of self-criticism and burnout.

Consistently prioritizing the needs of others over their own undermines their mental and physical health. This ultimately hinders their ability to function effectively and find fulfillment in both personal and professional aspects of life.

Final thoughts: self-compassion is key

To those who find themselves trapped in the relentless cycle of self-criticism, know that you are not alone in this struggle. It’s okay to acknowledge your imperfections and mistakes—they do not define your worth as a person.

Just as you would extend kindness to this friend, it’s crucial to extend the same compassion to yourself.  Start by taking small steps each day to prioritize your own needs and nurture your mind, body, and soul.

Along the way, celebrate your successes, no matter how small, and practice gratitude for the journey of growth and self-discovery.