People who are highly resilient and always bounce back from setbacks usually display these 8 specific behaviors
There’s a unique group of people who seem to take life’s punches on the chin, only to bounce back stronger. These people possess a quality known as resilience.
Now, resilience isn’t about ignoring difficulties or pretending everything is rosy. It’s about acknowledging setbacks and finding effective ways to move forward.
Hi. I’m Lachlan Brown, founder of Hack Spirit, and I’ve spent years studying these highly resilient individuals. What I’ve found is that they consistently display 8 specific behaviors.
In this article, I’ll be sharing these behaviors with you, not just for the sake of sharing but in the hope that you might also cultivate them and enhance your own resilience.
1) Embrace change
Resilient individuals have an uncanny knack for embracing change.
Change, as we all know, is the only constant in life, but it’s also a source of anxiety for many. We often fear the unknown and prefer the comfort of what’s familiar.
But here’s the thing about individuals who consistently bounce back from setbacks – they view change not as a threat, but as an opportunity.
They understand that with every change comes the potential for growth and learning. This doesn’t mean they don’t feel apprehensive about change, but rather they choose to face it head-on instead of avoiding it.
Embracing change is one of those behaviors that sets resilient people apart. It allows them to adapt, evolve and, most importantly, to keep moving forward despite the odds.
2) Practice acceptance
As an expert in Buddhism, I’ve come to recognize the importance of acceptance in building resilience.
In Buddhism, the concept of acceptance is prevalent. It’s about acknowledging reality as it is, without trying to change or deny it. This mindset is also a cornerstone in the lives of highly resilient individuals.
When faced with setbacks, they don’t waste time and energy resisting what has happened. Instead, they accept the situation for what it is.
Acceptance doesn’t mean being passive or giving up. It means understanding that some things are beyond our control. By accepting this, resilient people free up mental resources to focus on what they can influence: their reactions and actions moving forward.
Incorporating acceptance into your life might be challenging initially, but it’s a powerful tool for resilience and one that can help you bounce back from any setback.
3) Maintain a positive outlook
Now, I’m not suggesting that resilient people are always cheerful or that they never have a bad day. We’re all human after all.
But what I’ve noticed is that highly resilient individuals tend to maintain a positive outlook, even in the face of adversity.
They don’t ignore the negatives or blind themselves to reality. Instead, they choose to focus on the possible positive outcomes and opportunities that may come from a difficult situation.
This positive outlook acts as a light at the end of the tunnel, helping them navigate through tough times. They see setbacks as temporary and believe in their ability to bounce back.
Incorporating this into your life can make a huge difference. I know it has in mine. It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it.
4) Practice mindfulness
One of the key principles of Buddhism, and one that I’ve written extensively about in my book, , is mindfulness.
Mindfulness is the practice of being fully present in the moment, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, without being overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s happening around us.
And it’s a behavior I’ve noticed resilient people have mastered.
In times of crisis or setback, they don’t let their minds wander to past failures or future worries. They remain focused on the here and now, dealing with the situation at hand.
By practicing mindfulness, they’re able to maintain clarity of thought, make better decisions, and respond effectively to adversity.
As I discuss in my book, mindfulness isn’t just beneficial for your resilience. It can also help you live a more fulfilled life by reducing your ego and helping you focus on what truly matters. It’s a subject I’m passionate about and I encourage you to explore.
If you want to check out my book, you can find it on Amazon here.
5) They allow themselves to feel pain
Now, this might seem counterintuitive. After all, isn’t resilience about bouncing back and moving on from setbacks?
Yes, it is. But resilient people also understand the importance of allowing themselves to feel pain.
Often, our instinct is to suppress negative emotions, to put on a brave face and carry on. But resilient individuals recognize that it’s okay to feel upset, angry, or hurt.
They give themselves permission to experience these emotions fully. They understand that it’s a part of the healing process and that by acknowledging their feelings, they’re better equipped to deal with them.
It’s not about wallowing in self-pity but about processing emotions in a healthy way. And it’s this emotional honesty with themselves that helps them bounce back stronger and more resilient than before.
6) They practice detachment
In Buddhism, detachment is a fundamental principle. It’s about letting go of attachment to outcomes, people, and material possessions.
And it’s also a behavior that resilient individuals exhibit.
When faced with a setback, instead of clinging to what could have been or what should have been, they let go. They detach themselves from the outcome, understanding that they can only control their actions and not the results.
This doesn’t mean they don’t care or they don’t strive for success. Far from it. But they understand that their self-worth isn’t tied to outcomes or external validation.
By practicing detachment, they’re able to stay balanced and composed in the face of adversity – a key trait that enables them to bounce back from setbacks time and time again.
7) They’re not afraid to ask for help
Here’s something that might surprise you. Highly resilient people, often seen as self-reliant and independent, are not afraid to ask for help.
We often equate seeking help with weakness or incompetence. But resilient individuals see it differently. They understand that everyone needs help sometimes, and there’s no shame in asking for it.
When faced with a setback, they don’t hesitate to seek advice, to learn from others, or to ask for support. They recognize their limitations and understand that collaboration and learning from others can often be the key to overcoming challenges.
So, contrary to what many may believe, resilience isn’t about going it alone. It’s about knowing when to reach out and leverage the strengths and insights of others.
8) They cultivate gratitude
Gratitude is a principle deeply ingrained in Buddhism, and it’s also a behavior that I’ve noticed resilient people consistently display.
Even in the midst of adversity, they find reasons to be thankful. They focus on the good in their lives, however small it may seem.
This act of acknowledging the positive not only helps them keep things in perspective but also fosters a sense of contentment and peace, even during tough times.
Practicing gratitude doesn’t mean ignoring the difficulties. It’s about appreciating the good despite the bad.
Cultivating gratitude is a powerful way to boost resilience. It can shift our focus from what’s wrong to what’s right, helping us bounce back from setbacks with a positive spirit.
Final thoughts
Resilience isn’t about avoiding setbacks or difficulties.
The behaviors I talked about above form the backbone of resilience and can help us not only to bounce back from setbacks but also to grow and thrive in the process.
Each of these behaviors is within our reach. It might take some practice and patience, but the rewards are worth it, as I’ve discovered in my own journey and as I’ve shared in my book, .
Remember, resilience is less about what happens to us and more about how we respond. So let’s choose to respond with resilience.
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