There’s a difference between genuine friendliness and hidden resentment.

People might smile at you while harbouring ill feelings underneath. They might seem friendly but secretly, they can’t stand you.

Understanding the subtle signs of this hidden dislike can save you time, energy, and unnecessary heartache.

In this article, I’m going to spill the beans on the 9 subtle behaviors displayed by people who act friendly on the surface but secretly dislike you underneath.

So let’s dive in and start spotting those secret signals.

1) They’re overly sweet

We’ve all met those people who seem too good to be true. They’re always overly sweet, complimenting you at every turn and making you feel like a million bucks.

But, have you ever felt like it’s all just a little… too much?

Well, your instincts might be right. People who overdo their friendliness could be hiding their real feelings behind a carefully constructed facade of niceness.

This excessive sugariness can be a façade to mask their true feelings – a clever ploy to keep you off guard while they subtly undermine or belittle you.

So next time when someone is laying it on thick, take a moment to question if it’s genuine or just a smokescreen for their hidden resentment.

2) They avoid eye contact

When I was in university, there was this one guy who always seemed friendly. He would smile, ask about my day, and even laugh at my jokes. But, he would rarely look me in the eyes.

At first, I brushed it off thinking maybe he was just shy. But over time, I noticed that this behavior was exclusive to me. He seemed perfectly comfortable maintaining eye contact with others.

That’s when I realized something was off. His lack of eye contact was a subtle sign of his hidden dislike.

Eye contact is a powerful form of nonverbal communication. When someone avoids it, it can often indicate discomfort or a lack of genuine interest.

If you notice someone consistently avoiding your gaze while acting friendly, it might be worth questioning their true feelings towards you.

3) They mimic your moves

Ever noticed how some people have a knack for subtly copying your body language, gestures, or speech patterns?

This is known as mirroring, a common social behavior that helps to establish rapport and build connections.

However, when this copying is done excessively and with ulterior motives, it can be an indication of concealed hostility.

Individuals who don’t genuinely like you may consciously or subconsciously mirror your actions to create a false sense of familiarity and friendliness. It’s a subtle way of gaining your trust and keeping you off balance.

So be mindful of the people who seem to mimic your every move while maintaining a friendly façade. It could be their way of hiding their true feelings.

4) They never initiate contact

Friendships and relationships are all about reciprocation. You call, they call. You text, they text.

But what if you’re the one always making the first move?

People who act friendly when you’re around, but never seem to initiate contact, might be signaling their secret dislike.

While they might engage in conversations and activities when you initiate them, the lack of effort from their side could indicate a lack of genuine interest or liking.

This subtle behavior can often go unnoticed, especially if they’re good at acting friendly when you’re together. But remember, actions (or lack thereof) often speak louder than words.

5) They’re quick to criticize

Have you ever had a friend who seems nice enough, but is always the first to point out your flaws or mistakes?

While constructive criticism can be helpful, people who secretly dislike you often use it as a cover to subtly bring you down. They might disguise their jabs as ‘friendly advice’ or ‘just joking’, but the underlying intention is often to belittle or undermine you.

So, be aware of those who are quick to criticize while maintaining a friendly demeanor.

It could very well be a sign of their hidden disdain.

6) They exclude you subtly

We all crave belonging and acceptance, it’s a fundamental human need. So, when a ‘friend’ subtly excludes you from activities or conversations, it can really sting.

They might not make it obvious. Perhaps they ‘forget’ to invite you to a group outing or they talk about events you weren’t included in, while maintaining their friendly image.

This subtle form of exclusion can be a sign that they’re keeping you at arm’s length, despite their outward friendliness. It’s a quiet way to express their hidden dislike without making it too obvious.

True friends want to include you, not exclude you.

So if this behavior is a recurring theme, it might be time to evaluate the authenticity of their friendliness.

7) They’re always too busy

I remember a time when I used to constantly reach out to a colleague for lunch, brainstorming sessions, or just a quick chat. But more often than not, she would always respond with the same line- “Sorry, I’m too busy.”

While we all have hectic days and schedules, it became increasingly clear that her busyness only applied to me. She was always available for others.

When someone is perpetually too busy for you, despite their friendly demeanor, it could be a sign that they’re keeping their distance intentionally.

This constant avoidance might indicate their hidden dislike towards you.

8) They’re indifferent to your success

One of the most subtle signs of hidden dislike is indifference. And this often becomes apparent when you share your achievements or successes.

A person who secretly dislikes you may react with indifference or lack of enthusiasm when you’re celebrating a win. This isn’t about expecting a parade, but genuine friends express happiness and pride when you succeed.

So watch out for those who respond with a lackluster “Oh, that’s nice” or quickly change the subject when you share good news.

Despite their friendly exterior, their indifferent reactions might be revealing their true feelings.

9) Their body language is off

The final and perhaps most telling sign is their body language. Words can be deceptive, but body language usually doesn’t lie.

People who secretly dislike you may maintain a friendly façade, but their body language can reveal discomfort or tension. They might cross their arms, avoid physical contact, or orient their body away from you.

So pay close attention to people’s non-verbal cues. They often reveal more about their true feelings than any friendly words ever could.