I’m not retired. Not even close. But my parents are moving into this phase, and it got me thinking about what makes some retirees thrive while others struggle.

You’ve probably noticed it too. Some people hit 65 and flourish. Others seem lost without the daily grind to structure their days.

What makes the difference?

The research I’ve come across seems to suggest it’s not about how much money you saved or where you retire to. The happiest retirees share certain habits – and they’re not always what you’d expect.

Let me walk you through five habits that appear to separate the truly happy retirees from those who struggle to adjust.

1. They maintain social connections (and make new ones)

Here’s something that might surprise you: the Harvard Study of Adult Development – one of the longest studies on happiness – found that good relationships are a better predictor of health at 80 than cholesterol levels at 50.

Let that sink in for a moment.

And loneliness? The US Surgeon General compared its mortality impact is similar to smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

Many retirees make the mistake of thinking their social life will just continue as before. But without the built-in social structure of work, connections need intentional effort. The happy ones join clubs, volunteer, take classes – anything that puts them around people regularly.

2. They keep learning something new

Remember being forced to learn stuff in school? Well, turns out the happiest retirees voluntarily go back to being students.

Research suggests that keeping your brain engaged with new learning is crucial for well-being in later life. It’s not about formal education – it’s about curiosity and mental stimulation.

The retirees who thrive are reading books, learning languages, picking up instruments, or diving into hobbies they never had time for. They treat their brain like a muscle that still needs exercise.

3. They stay physically active (but not how you think)

No, you don’t need to become a marathon runner at 70.

One study in the British Journal of Sports Medicine found that regular physical activity improves cognitive functions like memory, and cognition. But here’s the thing – “regular” doesn’t mean “intense.”

The happiest retirees aren’t necessarily the ones hitting the gym hard. They’re the ones who build movement into their daily routine. Walking the dog. Gardening. Playing golf. Dancing. Swimming.

Research from “blue zones” – areas where people routinely live past 90 – suggest that it’s not about structured exercise. It’s about staying naturally active throughout the day. These people aren’t doing CrossFit; they’re tending gardens and walking to the market.

The key is consistency, not intensity. Find something you actually enjoy doing, and you’re more likely to keep doing it.

4. They practice gratitude (even when things aren’t perfect)

This one sounds like it belongs on a motivational poster, but stick with me.

Experts say that gratitude can reduce depressive symptoms by 35%. The Stoic philosophers knew this thousands of years ago – Cicero, for instance, wrote “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.”

Happy retirees have figured out something important: retirement isn’t always sunshine and golf courses. Health issues crop up. Friends pass away. The world changes in ways you don’t always like.

But they’ve developed a habit of acknowledging what’s good, even when things are tough. Not in a fake, toxic positivity way. Just recognizing the decent coffee, the comfortable chair, the fact that they woke up this morning.

It’s a mental shift from focusing on what’s been lost (career, youth, certain abilities) to what remains and what’s gained (time, freedom, perspective).

5. They create new purpose (instead of mourning the old one)

This might be the biggest one.

Many people define themselves by their careers. “I’m a teacher.” “I’m an engineer.” “I’m a manager.” Then retirement hits, and suddenly… who are you?

The happiest retirees don’t just drift. They find new ways to contribute and feel useful. Again, research backs this up suggesting that having a sense of purpose is linked to better health outcomes and longer life.

Some volunteer with causes they care about. Others become mentors. Some start small businesses, not for the money but for the engagement. Many become the family historians, gardeners, or organizers.

Final thoughts

Here’s what all this research really tells us: the happiest retirees aren’t always the ones with the biggest nest eggs or the best beach houses.

They’re the ones who stay connected, keep learning, move their bodies, appreciate what they have, and find new ways to matter.

You don’t need to wait until retirement to start these habits, by the way. In fact, the earlier you start, the easier the transition becomes.

But if you’re already there, it’s never too late to start. Pick one habit. Try it for a month. See what happens.

Until next time.