Have you ever noticed a guy who seems unhappy in his relationship, yet he stays put anyway?

I used to wonder why this happens so often.

Years ago, I saw it firsthand in a close friend. He would complain endlessly about how his partner dismissed his feelings and never made time for him.

Yet every time I asked him why he didn’t just leave, he shrugged and said something like, “I’m used to it.”

That’s when I realized: comfort can be a powerful adhesive—even when it’s hurting more than helping.

So today, I want to share seven behaviors that, according to psychological insights, often show up in men who are unhappy but too comfortable to walk away.

Let’s get started.

1. He withdraws from meaningful communication

A man who’s checked out emotionally tends to avoid in-depth conversations.

Sure, surface-level chat might still happen—discussions about the grocery list or the next bill—but he won’t dive deep. He might nod along or give a quick grunt of acknowledgment.

According to Psychology Today, men who feel emotionally unfulfilled often become passive in their communication.

They’re physically there but mentally absent, and this detachment is a telltale sign something is off.

We all want to be heard. When a man pulls back from genuine dialogue, it suggests he’s lost hope in ever resolving the tension or feeling truly understood.

It’s not always dramatic. In fact, it can be subtle—a slowdown in text replies, a dwindling number of inside jokes, or a general sense that he’s just going through the motions.

If you sense this shift, it might mean he’s unhappy and slipping into a pattern of emotional distancing.

2. He relies on routines and habits to “keep the peace”

Men who are discontent but unwilling to make a change often turn to routine.

Maybe he has the same dinner every Wednesday, the same TV show every Friday night, and the same jokes he’s been telling for years.

At a glance, there’s nothing harmful about routine. But when it becomes a way to dodge confrontation or avoid facing the problem, it’s a red flag.

Routines can be a kind of camouflage for deeper issues.

He doesn’t want to rock the boat, so he keeps everything as predictable as possible.

While predictability can feel comforting in a turbulent relationship, it also prevents real growth or the tough conversations that might be necessary to address what’s missing.

When you see a man doubling down on the same old patterns—simply to avoid conflict—he may be trying to suppress his unhappiness rather than resolve it.

3. He seems perpetually annoyed or defensive over small things

On the surface, it might look like he’s just grumpy.

He might snap over a dish left in the sink or the way his partner folds the laundry.

But deeper down, he’s frustrated that he doesn’t feel fulfilled.

Science Direct mentions that men are less likely to seek professional help for relationship or emotional concerns. Instead of saying, “I’m upset,” they might channel that emotion into constant irritability.

Why?

Because it’s easier to be angry about a small annoyance than to admit to yourself (and your partner) that you’re stuck, unhappy, and scared of leaving.

If you notice these small blow-ups happening day after day, it’s a potential sign he’s longing for change but not taking any steps toward it.

4. He stops investing time and energy

Another behavior is a decline in active effort—whether it’s planning date nights, showing genuine curiosity about his partner’s day, or making an effort to maintain physical intimacy.

In my marketing days, I worked with couples-focused brands.

You’d be surprised how many surveys I saw where men reported that they didn’t see the point of trying anymore once they felt the relationship was beyond repair.

Yet they stayed.

They might show up physically, but mentally and emotionally, they’ve hit the eject button.

This kind of half-presence can create a heartbreaking situation, because the partner might sense the withdrawal but can’t quite put their finger on it.

If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of this, you know it doesn’t feel good.

It’s easy to blame yourself or wonder what you did wrong. But it’s not always that clear.

Sometimes he’s battling internal disappointments and assumptions that nothing can change. So he coasts. He goes through the motions, but he’s no longer truly invested.

5. He uses external distractions to fill the void

Distraction is a common escape route.

Some men frequently avoid confronting emotional distress head-on, which can show up as turning to external diversions instead.

That might look like:

• Excessive hours at work
• Obsessive gaming
• Endless social media scrolling
• Overcommitment to friends or new hobbies

Any one of these alone isn’t necessarily a problem.

But if he’s suddenly spending triple the time on hobbies or staying out late far more often, it might be more about avoiding a tough situation than genuinely enjoying those activities.

Distractions let him numb out and avoid acknowledging he’s not satisfied.

Over the long haul, though, it deepens the rift at home.

If you find yourself thinking he’s never around or always busy, that could be a sign he’s more comfortable burying himself in other pursuits than addressing his relationship worries.

6. He has zero interest in discussing the future

I know from my own life that talking about the future can be exciting.

When I talk to my son, I encourage him to be open-minded, think big, and never let anyone else define his path.

But in a failing relationship, future talk can provoke anxiety or a sense of dread.

Men who feel stuck may stop mentioning long-term plans altogether.

They might dismiss vacation ideas or change the subject when marriage or kids come up.

The idea of making bigger commitments feels suffocating if they’re already unhappy.

As the discomfort grows, he might even avoid smaller future plans—like holiday get-togethers or mutual social events—because it forces him to face the reality that he’s still in a partnership he no longer wants.

If the future becomes a taboo topic, it’s worth paying attention. There’s likely a deeper fear or dissatisfaction lurking beneath the silence.

7. He resigns himself to a life of “this is just how it is”

I don’t want to skip something crucial: complacency often masquerades as acceptance.

A man might convince himself that his situation is “not that bad.”

He’s not thrilled, but the bills get paid, the arguments aren’t explosive, and he’s more or less used to going through the motions.

Before we wrap up, let’s look at one more angle.

Some men grew up with the belief that leaving a relationship is a sign of failure or disloyalty.

They might equate a breakup with personal shortcomings. So rather than face those feelings of “failing,” they settle into routine misery.

If he doesn’t exercise the courage to confront what’s wrong, he ends up drifting in a loop of stale comfort.

It becomes routine dissatisfaction, day after day.

Conclusion

If any of these behaviors sound familiar, it’s a wake-up call.

No one deserves to stay in a relationship that chips away at their emotional well-being, and that includes men who feel trapped by comfort.

Whether it’s seeking counseling, having an honest talk with a partner, or simply acknowledging the dissatisfaction, the first step is recognizing there’s a problem.

The next step is finding the courage to do something about it, even if it feels scary.

Sometimes it’s more frightening to imagine leaving than to continue in an unhappy relationship.

But real fulfillment can’t happen until someone is willing to address what’s actually going on.

I’m still figuring this out too, so take what works and adapt it to your life. I hope you’ll think about these warning signs and consider whether you—or someone you care about—might be staying in an uncomfortable situation just because it’s familiar.

Change doesn’t have to happen overnight, but admitting the need for change is a powerful start.