If you’re struggling with self-doubt, these 8 habits will help you “fake it until you make it”

Tina Fey by Tina Fey | October 11, 2024, 1:37 pm

Self-doubt can be a real kicker, can’t it? It’s like a gremlin in your mind, constantly whispering that you’re not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough.

But here’s the thing – you don’t have to listen to that gremlin. In fact, you can fool it into silence by “faking it until you make it”.

“Fake it until you make it” isn’t about being dishonest or insincere. It’s about acting as if you already believe in yourself, even when you don’t. It’s about adopting habits that make you feel more confident, even when that confidence isn’t yet real.

And guess what? I’ve got 8 such habits that I want to share with you. So if self-doubt is a constant struggle for you, stick around. These habits might just change your life.

1) Positive affirmations

Self-affirmations can be a powerful tool in combating self-doubt. They’re like little reminders that help you shift your focus from what you think you can’t do to what you can.

Here’s the thing about them: they might feel a little weird at first. And that’s because we’re not used to speaking kindly to ourselves. We’re more accustomed to self-criticism, aren’t we?

But with a bit of practice, positive affirmations can start to feel less alien and more natural.

The trick is to focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses. Instead of telling yourself “I can’t do this,” try affirming “I’m capable and strong.”

Remember, the goal isn’t to convince yourself of something that isn’t true. It’s to remind yourself of the truth that self-doubt often obscures: that you are capable, strong and worthy.

So next time self-doubt creeps in, counter it with a positive affirmation. It might just be the nudge you need to keep going.

2) Visualizing success

I’ll let you in on a little secret: I was terrified when I first started my career. I had no experience, no confidence, and self-doubt was my constant companion.

Then one day, a mentor suggested I try visualizing success. She told me to picture myself achieving my goals, to imagine how it would feel, what it would look like.

At first, I thought it sounded silly. How could daydreaming help me succeed? But I decided to give it a shot.

And you know what? It worked.

Every time I had to tackle a challenging task, I would take a moment to visualize myself succeeding. It helped me shift my perspective from “I can’t do this” to “I’ve done this before.”

The more I practiced, the more confident I became. And over time, that confidence started to spill over into my real-life performance.

The truth is, our brains have a hard time differentiating between vividly imagined experiences and real ones. So when we visualize success, our brains start to believe we can actually achieve it.

Visualizing success won’t magically make your challenges disappear. But it can help you approach them with a little more confidence and a little less self-doubt.

3) Embracing failure

Failure. It’s a word that often sends shivers down our spines. But did you know that J.K. Rowling, the author of the Harry Potter series, was rejected by 12 publishers before someone finally decided to give her a chance?

Failure is not something to be feared. It’s something to be embraced. It’s an opportunity to learn, to grow, to become better.

The fact is, everyone fails at some point or another. What sets successful people apart is how they respond to failure.

Instead of letting it fuel their self-doubt, they use it as a stepping stone towards success. They acknowledge their mistakes, learn from them, and then move on.

So next time you fail at something, don’t let it get you down. Embrace it. Learn from it. And remember: every failure brings you one step closer to success.

4) Practicing self-compassion

In the face of failure or setbacks, it’s easy to be hard on ourselves. But this harsh self-criticism only feeds our self-doubt and keeps us feeling stuck.

Instead, try practicing self-compassion. This is the act of treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend in a similar situation.

When you make a mistake, instead of berating yourself, remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes. Allow yourself to feel the disappointment, but then let it go.

Self-compassion isn’t about making excuses for your shortcomings. It’s about acknowledging that you’re human, and like all humans, you’re prone to err.

By practicing self-compassion, you can learn to navigate through your mistakes without allowing them to erode your self-confidence. It’s a powerful tool in overcoming self-doubt and moving towards your goals.

5) Surrounding yourself with positive influences

Sometimes, the people we spend the most time with can have a significant impact on our self-doubt. If you’re constantly surrounded by negativity, it can seep into your thoughts and behaviors.

I know how tough it can be to distance yourself from negative influences, especially when they’re close friends or family members. But for the sake of your mental health and self-esteem, it’s essential to surround yourself with positivity.

Look for people who inspire you, who lift you up, who see the potential in you even when you don’t. These are the people who will encourage you when you’re struggling and celebrate your achievements when you succeed.

Remember, you have every right to protect your mental space. So be selective about who you let in. Surround yourself with positivity and watch as your self-doubt starts to shrink.

6) Setting achievable goals

Setting wildly ambitious goals can be exciting, but it can also be a fast track to self-doubt when those goals seem too far out of reach.

Years ago, I set a goal for myself to write a book. I was full of enthusiasm and ideas, but as the weeks turned into months, I found myself no closer to completing my manuscript. The enormity of the task was simply overwhelming, and my self-doubt began to creep in.

I realized that I needed to break down my big goal into smaller, more manageable ones. Instead of trying to write a whole book, I decided to focus on writing one chapter at a time.

Suddenly, my goal seemed much more achievable. And with each chapter I completed, my confidence grew.

Setting achievable goals can help keep self-doubt at bay. When you see yourself making progress, even if it’s small, it boosts your confidence and motivates you to keep going. So don’t be afraid to start small. Every step forward is a victory against self-doubt.

7) Practicing mindfulness

Mindfulness is the act of focusing your attention on the present moment, acknowledging and accepting it without judgment. It’s a simple practice, but its impact on self-doubt can be profound.

When we’re caught up in self-doubt, we’re often focused on our past mistakes or future worries. This can leave us feeling overwhelmed and stuck.

But mindfulness brings us back to the present. It helps us to focus on what we can control right now, rather than getting lost in what-ifs and should-haves.

You can practice mindfulness in many ways, such as meditation, yoga, or simply taking a few moments each day to focus on your breath.

By practicing mindfulness, you can learn to quiet the noise of self-doubt and focus on your capabilities in the here and now. It’s a powerful tool for fostering self-belief and resilience.

8) Believing in yourself

At the end of the day, overcoming self-doubt comes down to one thing: believing in yourself. It’s about trusting in your abilities, your strengths, and your capacity to learn and grow.

Believing in yourself doesn’t mean that you won’t have moments of doubt. It means that even in those moments, you choose to trust in your potential.

Remember, self-doubt is just a feeling, not a fact. You have every right to believe in yourself, to chase your dreams, and to become the person you want to be.

So start today. Believe in yourself. You’re more capable than you think.

Final thoughts: It’s a journey

The journey to self-belief and overcoming self-doubt isn’t always straightforward. It’s a winding road, filled with ups and downs, victories and setbacks.

Each of us have our unique battles with self-doubt. But remember this: you’re stronger than your doubts. You’re more capable than you give yourself credit for.

Albert Einstein once said, “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” Don’t be the fish trying to climb a tree.

The habits we’ve discussed here aren’t quick fixes, but they’re stepping stones to help you navigate through the fog of self-doubt. They’re tools to help you foster self-belief and resilience amid life’s challenges.

As you embark or continue this journey, remember to be patient with yourself. Changes don’t happen overnight. But every step you take towards overcoming self-doubt is a step towards a more confident and empowered you.

So keep going. Keep believing. You’ve got this.

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