Choosing a partner is one of the most significant decisions we make in our lives. More than just about finding someone who checks all the boxes on our ideal partner wish list, it all comes down to finding a person who helps us grow and brings out the best in us.

I’ve had my fair share of relationships, some great, some not so much. And along the way, I’ve learned that there are certain behaviors that indicate you’ve chosen wisely in your partner.

Here are 8 things I’ve come to realize that a good partner does. If your partner does these, you’re on the right track.

Let’s dive in.

1) They respect your individuality

Each of us is unique, carrying our distinct set of values, passions, and quirks. A wise partner choice respects this individuality.

They won’t try to mold you into a version of a perfect partner that they’ve conceived in their mind. Instead, they’ll cherish your unique qualities, even those that might be challenging at times.

This goes beyond tolerating differences; it’s all about respecting them and understanding that these differences make you who you are, and they are part of why your partner is drawn to you.

Respecting individuality also means giving each other space to grow and evolve independently.

In my experience, the best relationships are those where two individuals grow together but also maintain their independent journeys of personal growth.

In essence, if your partner respects your individuality and encourages your personal growth, you’ve chosen wisely. Embrace who you are and let your authenticity shine.

2) They practice active listening

Communication is vital in a relationship, but it’s not just about expressing your own thoughts and feelings. It also involves actively listening to your partner.

When your partner truly listens, they’re not just waiting for their turn to speak. They’re fully present with you in the moment, absorbing what you’re saying and seeking to understand your perspective.

If your partner practices active listening, they’re showing a profound respect for your voice and your experiences—a clear sign of wisdom in partner choice.

3) They encourage your personal growth

In a relationship, your partner should inspire you to grow and evolve. This growth isn’t always comfortable—it requires confronting fears, challenging limiting beliefs, and stepping into vulnerability.

Yet, a wise partner will support you in this journey, understanding that your personal development enriches the relationship.

I’ve discovered a powerful resource that can help you on this path: a free masterclass titled “The Art of Love and Intimacy” by the shaman Rudá Iandê. This masterclass dismantles the myth of the perfect partner and ideal relationship, grounding you in reality and empowering you to embrace your present circumstances to improve your relationships.

One key exercise in this masterclass reveals that our external relationships mirror our internal relationship with ourselves. This insight places us in control of our personal development, aligning with my belief in personal responsibility and authentic connections.

By watching this masterclass, you’ll gain transformative insights that will empower you to cultivate deeper, more meaningful relationships. It’s a powerful tool for anyone seeking to create fulfilling and authentic relationships.

If your partner encourages your personal growth and supports you on this journey, it’s a sure sign that you’ve chosen wisely. I highly recommend checking out the “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass to further enhance both your internal and external connections.

4) They challenge you

Choosing the right partner isn’t always about comfort and ease. It’s about finding someone who challenges you, pushing your boundaries and helping you step out of your comfort zone.

This doesn’t mean they’re constantly trying to change you or they’re never satisfied with who you are. It means they see your potential and they’re not afraid to encourage you to reach it, even if it means facing difficult conversations or situations.

This aligns with the teachings from the “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass I mentioned earlier. Just like how the masterclass challenges societal conditioning around love and intimacy, your partner should challenge you to break free from limiting beliefs and patterns that hold you back.

If your partner challenges you in a way that promotes growth, compassion, and understanding, then you’ve chosen wisely. Reflect on this: How has your partner challenged you to become a better version of yourself?

5) They aren’t afraid to show their vulnerabilities

In a world where we’re often encouraged to hide our perceived weaknesses, it might seem strange to celebrate vulnerability.

Yet, in a relationship, the ability to expose vulnerabilities is a sign of strength and authenticity.

A partner who isn’t afraid to show their flaws, fears, and insecurities is one who values authenticity over image. They understand that being human means being imperfect, and they’re comfortable sharing their whole selves with you.

This openness creates a safe space for you to share your vulnerabilities too. It fosters deep connection, mutual respect, and empathy—cornerstones of a strong relationship.

If your partner isn’t afraid to be vulnerable with you, it’s a sign that they trust you deeply and that they’re committed to building an authentic relationship.

6) They support your passions

Your passions and dreams are an essential part of who you are. A great partner understands this and supports you in pursuing what sets your soul on fire.

Supporting your passions doesn’t mean they need to share them. It means they respect your individuality and encourage you to do what brings you joy, even if it doesn’t directly involve them.

It’s through our connections with others that we find the courage to pursue our dreams. If your partner supports your passions, they’re not just investing in your happiness. They’re investing in the authenticity and vitality of your relationship.

7) They show empathy

Empathy is about more than understanding someone’s feelings. It’s about sharing those feelings, entering their emotional world, and connecting with them on a deeper level.

If your partner can empathize with you—whether in moments of joy or pain—it creates a bond of mutual understanding and respect. It shows that they value your experiences and are willing to stand by your side, no matter what.

When your partner shows empathy, they’re not just strengthening your relationship. They’re also contributing to a world where compassion is valued over competition—where every individual has the opportunity to thrive.

8) They celebrate your successes

In a world that often prioritizes individual success, finding a partner who genuinely celebrates your achievements is a treasure.

It shows that they value your happiness and are secure enough in themselves not to feel threatened by your success.

Celebrating each other’s successes contributes to shared joy and builds a supportive community within the relationship.

If your partner celebrates your successes as if they were their own, it’s a clear sign you’ve chosen well. After all, none of us can thrive alone. We thrive through the support of those we love.

Wrapping it up

Before I go, I’d just like to emphasize that relationships are not just about finding the right person but about being the right person. By recognizing these qualities in your partner, you also learn what to cultivate within yourself to create a more fulfilling and authentic connection.

For those ready to delve deeper into these insights and apply them to their personal and relationship growth, I highly recommend the free “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass with Rudá Iandê.

This masterclass, rooted in the same principles we’ve discussed here, will guide you in breaking free from societal conditioning around love and intimacy.

By watching this masterclass, you’ll gain a deeper understanding of your relationships and how they mirror your inner world. It’s a transformative experience that will empower you to cultivate deeper, more meaningful connections.

Take a step towards creating the kind of relationships and personal growth you desire by checking out the “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass.

It’s an opportunity not only to enhance your relationships but also to contribute towards creating a world where creativity, compassion, and collaboration are the guiding principles.