If there’s no respect in a relationship, how can you possibly expect it to work?

So many relationships start out full of fun, adventure, exploration, and exhilaration. But if they don’t also build up healthy respect, they’re probably not long for this world.

Other relationships start with a good foundation of respect, but the actions of one or both partners start to erode the foundation until, one day, it will finally crumble.

Respect between partners can start to disappear for any number of reasons. Most are based on changes in the relationship, resentment, hurt feelings, or even acts of infidelity.

So, how do you know if your partner still respects you?

You can try to communicate about it, but sometimes your partner may refuse to talk about the issue or even play your concerns off as unfounded.

But there’s another way to tell – how they act around you.

If your partner displays these eight body language signs, deep down, they’re losing respect for you, and you’re going to have to figure out how to get it back.

1) Not looking at you when you’re talking

Not everyone is great at eye contact – some people find it hard to maintain, while others just don’t value it so highly.

Regardless, you’ll already know your partner’s normal level of eye contact from the time you’ve spent together.

So if this changes, it can be a body language sign that deep down, they’re losing respect for you.

If they start to look at you less when you’re in a conversation or even turn away when you’re talking, they could be showing you that they don’t respect you as they once did.

This is going to be especially evident if they turn away from you and look at the TV or play with their phones in the middle of your talk.

Of course, if you instigate a conversation in the middle of a show, they’re watching, or when they’re already on their phone, they’re going to be distracted.

That’s not the same thing as turning away from you or losing interest when you’re meant to be talking.

2) Walking away during conversations

Even worse than turning away or looking at their phone during a conversation is if they walk away.

Yes, some people actually do this!

If your partner is one of them, they could be showing you a real lack of respect and interest in what you have to say.

If they really cared or thought what you were talking about was important, why would they walk away?

To be clear, if your partner is busy and distracted, running around doing chores or cleaning up, and you spring a conversation on them, that’s different.

You can’t expect them to drop everything and stand stock still to listen to you.

If you do, maybe you’re being disrespectful of them instead.

3) Not talking to you

Also known as the silent treatment, this is a weaponized passive-aggressive behavior. It’s designed to let you know that they’re unhappy with you without having to actually say anything about it.

They might not necessarily give you the full cold shoulder, but they might become really uncommunicative, answering you in grunts and one-word phrases and never instigating conversations.

If they’re mad at you, that doesn’t mean that they don’t respect you, however.

You may very well have done something to deserve their anger.

It’s the way that they interact with you that shows a lack of respect.

By refusing to talk to you, they’re either forcing you to come groveling to them on your hands and knees, or they’re sending the message that you’re not worth wasting their time with.

Both are disrespectful.

Just be aware, though, that some people go silent during relationship conflicts because they’re not good at handling them and would rather clam up than explode in anger.

Then their silence isn’t meant as a power move or to disrespect you.

4) Withholding affection

Remember the early days of your relationship?

Weren’t you inseparable and so often intertwined it was hard to know where your body ended and theirs began?

So what happened?

Why are you now in a situation where they reject your physical affection and withhold theirs from you?

It could be that they don’t respect you anymore.

I’m talking about slipping away when you try to encircle them with an embrace or squirming away from kisses.

You can also see this when someone simply stops doing the affectionate things they used to do.

They won’t touch you, hug you, or kiss you anymore, or at least not nearly as much as they used to.

Of course, this withholding of affection might result from anger or hurt feelings, but if it continues for a long time, the likely culprit is that they’re losing respect for you.

5) Flirting with others in front of you

This can be a really obvious and also tremendously hurtful sign that your partner doesn’t respect you anymore.

Flirting is fun and gives people a way to check their ratings in the dating pool.

A lot of people will flirt a little bit here and there just to have a good time and make themselves feel like they’ve still got it going on.

As long as it’s not serious and doesn’t lead anywhere, this is normally quite harmless behavior.

But it becomes a totally different thing when they suddenly do it right in front of their partners.

Of course, if they were always flirty and nothing has changed, this probably means nothing.

But if they start to touch other people, hug or hold onto them, and send out other flirtatious signals right in front of their partner, they’re basically saying, “I don’t care what you think. I’ve got other options. See?”

Pretty darned disrespectful, right?

6) Getting in your face

One behavioral sign of losing respect for a person is if you ignore or intentionally trample on their boundaries.

Well, there’s a corresponding body language sign that is just as clear – invading the person’s personal space.

We all have space that we consider ours and which shouldn’t be entered by anyone while we’re present in it.

While this varies across cultures and even individuals, Americans usually reserve the space 18 inches to four feet from themselves as personal space.

Within 18 inches of you is your intimate space that people can only enter if you let them.

But you might find that your partner gets into your personal space or even your intimate space at times that aren’t appropriate.

While romantic time allows them to come in, an argument pushes them back. 

But if they start to really get up in your face during arguments, looming over you or even wagging their finger in your face in a threatening way, that’s not respectful in the slightest.

7) Keeping separated

As humans, we’re social animals who have allies, friends, and enemies.

Our body language shows who we like and feel associated with and who we want to keep at arm’s length.

So when someone doesn’t want to be associated with you, what do they do?

They keep far away from you.

Even though people know you’re a couple, your partner might still stay clear across the room from you at a party or sit far away from you at a group dinner.

This physical space can speak volumes, telling others that they don’t want to be grouped together with you.

Now, if your partner is really social and an expert at getting around and working the room, this might not mean you any disrespect and could just be their normal behavior.

But if you notice a change that makes your partner keep away from you often, it may well be because they’re losing respect for you.

8) Aggressive staring

The last body language sign that your partner is losing respect for you is simply the way they look at you.

We all know the difference between soft, intimate eye contact and a hard, aggressive stare.

And if your partner has changed from using the former to often fixing you with the latter, this can show they don’t respect you anymore.

It might feel like they’re trying to burn a hole right through you with their stare. Perhaps they’re scanning deep inside of you, trying to find why they used to respect you and don’t anymore.

By staring at you with a look of aggression or disdain, they can show you exactly how they feel.

Final Thoughts

If your partner displays these eight body language signs, deep down, they’re losing respect for you.

They might not even be conscious of their own feelings, but their body language subconsciously shows through whether they want it to or not.

This might be because of something you’ve done or a change in their behavior or feelings about the relationship. 

But once respect goes, the relationship is sure to follow. So, if you want to save your relationship, you’ll need to find a way to turn things around.