Do you ever feel like loving your partner is more challenging than it should be?

I get it. Sometimes, it feels like you’re fighting an uphill battle.

Your partner’s behaviors can make you question whether they’re really the one for you. You pour your heart and soul into the relationship, but what do you get in return?

Yep, you guessed it…more frustration and less affection.

Sometimes, it can feel like you’re dealing with a puzzle that refuses to be solved or a riddle with no clear answer.

If this resonates with you, know that you’re not alone.

Many of us experience this struggle in our relationships. We love our partners, but their behaviors can make them difficult to love at times.

Today, we’re going to take a closer look at 9 behaviors that might signify your partner is a difficult person to love.

Some of them might hit a little close to home.

As we dive into this, bear in mind that I’m not here to tell you to leave your partner if they display these behaviors. That’s a decision only you can make.

What I am here to do is shed some light on the signs many of us overlook or dismiss.

You might already be aware of some of these.

…let’s find out.

1) They don’t validate your feelings

I remember a time when I was really upset about something that had happened at work. I came home, hoping for a bit of understanding and compassion from my partner.

Guess what I got? A dismissive shrug and an offhand comment: “You’re overreacting.”

At that moment, I felt completely invalidated. My feelings were real and raw, and my partner simply brushed them aside.

This is one of the key behaviors of a difficult person to love. They don’t validate your feelings. 

Instead, they might label your reactions as ‘over the top’ or ‘unnecessary,’ making you feel like you’re the one with the problem.

2) They constantly criticize

Moving on to the second point, criticism.

I once dated someone who was never happy with anything I did. Whether it was the way I dressed, cooked, or even laughed – there was always something to criticize.

Believe me when I say, this constant criticism can wear you down.

Constructive criticism is one thing. It’s meant to help you grow and improve. But constant negative feedback without any appreciation or acknowledgment of your efforts is a sign that your partner is not easy to love.

Remember, everyone makes mistakes. But if your partner only ever points out your faults without recognizing your strengths, they’re making love more challenging than it needs to be.

3) They refuse to apologize

Apologies are a fundamental part of any relationship. They demonstrate that we acknowledge our mistakes and are willing to make amends.

In relationships, if your partner never apologizes even when they’re clearly in the wrong, it’s a sign that they are a challenging person to love. They might justify their actions, play the victim, or even blame you for their mistakes.

This refusal to apologize not only shows a lack of respect for your feelings but it also hinders growth in the relationship. 

After all, acknowledging and learning from our mistakes is how we improve and move forward.

4) They don’t show empathy

Have you ever felt the weight of the world on your shoulders, and all you needed was for someone to say, “I understand how you feel”?

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s a vital ingredient for a loving relationship.

When your partner doesn’t show empathy, it can make you feel alone and unsupported, even in their presence. You might be sharing your deepest fears or greatest joys, but without their empathetic response, these moments can feel hollow and one-sided.

A lack of empathy not only creates emotional distance but also makes it difficult to build a deep, meaningful connection.

Because at the end of the day, isn’t that what love is all about? Understanding, supporting, and sharing life’s journey together?

5) They’re always right

This one hits close to home for me. I was in a relationship where my partner always had to be right. Whether it was deciding which movie to watch or discussing political views, there was no room for my opinions.

It felt like I was in a constant battle that I could never win. This wasn’t about finding common ground or learning from each other. It was about who could come out on top.

And let me tell you, it’s exhausting.

Being in a relationship with someone who always needs to be right can leave you feeling unheard and undervalued. It’s not about winning or losing; it’s about respect and understanding. 

If your partner can’t accept that they might be wrong sometimes, they’re making it a struggle for you to love them.

6) They’re overly possessive

In my early twenties, I dated someone who was excessively possessive. It started with small things, like wanting to know where I was and with whom. But gradually, it escalated to the point where they wanted control over every aspect of my life.

Possessiveness is often mistaken for care or love. But believe me, it’s not. It’s a sign of insecurity and can quickly turn a loving relationship into a suffocating one.

Remember, love is about trust and freedom, not control and isolation.

7) They’re not supportive

I once shared my dream of starting my own business with a partner. Instead of encouragement or advice, all I got were discouraging words and reasons why it would never work.

A supportive partner is like a cheerleader, always there to encourage you and lift you up. If your partner is constantly raining on your parade instead of supporting your aspirations, they’re making it harder for you to love them.

In a healthy relationship, both partners support each other’s goals and ambitions. They understand that individual growth contributes to the growth of the relationship.

8) They don’t respect your boundaries

Respect for personal boundaries is crucial in any relationship. Without it, conflicts can easily arise.

My best friend once dated someone who consistently crossed her boundaries. Despite numerous conversations about her need for personal space and time alone, he disregarded her wishes, causing stress and tension in their relationship.

If your partner doesn’t respect your boundaries – whether they’re emotional or physical – it’s a clear sign they’re a tough person to love. Your boundaries are essential and should always be respected.

9) They always play the victim

Psychologists call it “the victim syndrome,” where a person always portrays themselves as the victim, regardless of the situation.

I had a colleague whose partner always played the victim. No matter what happened, it was never their fault. This behavior made it hard for my colleague to express her feelings or concerns without feeling guilty.

If your partner does this and never takes responsibility for their actions, they’re making it a challenge for you to love them. Relationships are about accountability and working through problems together, not blaming each other.

In conclusion, these behaviors can make a person difficult to love. But it’s important to remember that everyone has flaws and we can all work towards bettering ourselves. Communication is key. 

If these behaviors are present in your relationship, it might be time to have a serious conversation with your partner.