We all have that one person in our life who seems to drain our energy. That’s a toxic person.

The thing is, sometimes we unintentionally attract these negative influences. It’s often due to certain behaviors we exhibit, and it’s these behaviors that we need to change.

Want to stop attracting toxic people? It’s time to say goodbye to these 10 behaviors.

Shifting your behavior can close the door on toxicity and open up a world where you’re surrounded by positive influences instead.

So let’s dive into what you may be doing wrong, and how to fix it.

1) Overly accommodating

Ever find yourself bending over backwards for someone who wouldn’t even lift a finger for you? You’re not alone.

We all want to be liked and accepted, but when this desire leads to constantly pleasing others at the cost of our own happiness, it can attract toxic people.

Toxic individuals thrive on control, and they love people who are easily swayed. They see them as easy targets to manipulate to their advantage.

Remember, you have the right to say no without feeling guilty. Don’t be afraid to assert yourself. It’s your life, and you should live it on your terms, not someone else’s.

2) Seeking validation

I’ll admit it; I used to be a serial validation-seeker. It was hard for me to make a decision without seeking the approval of others first. From choosing a restaurant for dinner to deciding on a career path, I was constantly looking for reassurance.

The problem with this behavior is that it can attract toxic people. They sense your insecurity and use it to their advantage, often manipulating you into doing what they want.

One day, I realized I was letting others dictate my life. I decided to put my foot down and start trusting my own judgment.

It was tough at first, but eventually, I began to feel more confident in my decisions and less dependent on others’ opinions.

And guess what? The toxic people started disappearing from my life. Because they no longer had the power to manipulate me, they moved onto easier targets.

If you find yourself constantly seeking validation, remember that your opinion matters too. Trust your instincts and make decisions that are right for you. This will not only boost your self-esteem but also deter toxic people.

3) Negative self-talk

Did you know that 80% of our thoughts are negative? That’s a lot of negativity we’re feeding ourselves!

When we constantly engage in negative self-talk, we lower our self-esteem. We start to believe that we’re not good enough, smart enough, or attractive enough.

And guess what? Toxic people are drawn to this lack of self-worth like moths to a flame. They feed off your insecurities and use them to maintain control and power in the relationship.

It’s time to flip the script. Start by recognizing your negative thought patterns and then work on replacing them with positive affirmations.

4) Fear of confrontation

Nobody enjoys conflict, but it’s inevitable. Avoiding confrontation at all costs can attract toxic individuals.

These people often use aggression or manipulation to get their way. If you’re always backing down, they’ll see you as easy to control.

Let’s be clear: Confrontation isn’t synonymous with picking fights. It’s about standing up for yourself, expressing your feelings, and setting boundaries.

It might be uncomfortable at first, but with practice, you’ll become more assertive and confident. And that’s something toxic people struggle with.

5) Ignoring red flags

We’ve all been there. We meet someone new, and they seem amazing at first. But soon, small signs start to show that maybe they’re not as great as we thought.

Maybe they’re constantly late, or they always cancel plans at the last minute. Or perhaps they have a knack for making every conversation about them. These are all red flags that we often choose to ignore because we like the person.

But ignoring these red flags can lead to a toxic relationship down the line. Toxic individuals often show their true colors early on, but we choose to overlook these signs because we want to see the best in people.

However, recognizing and addressing these red flags early can save you a lot of heartache in the long run. It’s important to trust your gut when something feels off and take action before a toxic relationship takes hold.

6) Not setting boundaries

Setting boundaries is an act of self-love. It’s about honoring your needs, your time, and your emotional well-being. Without them, we run the risk of being taken advantage of and attracting toxic individuals into our lives.

Toxic people don’t like boundaries because they thrive on control and manipulation. When we don’t set clear boundaries, we’re essentially giving them a free pass to treat us however they wish.

I understand that setting boundaries can be uncomfortable, especially if you’re not used to it. You might worry about coming across as rude or selfish. But make no mistake—it’s not selfish to care for yourself and prioritize your needs.

7) Playing the victim

There was a time when I saw myself as the victim.

I thought the world was against me and that I had no control over my circumstances. This mindset trapped me in a cycle of attracting toxic people who preyed on my vulnerability.

But one day, I realized I wasn’t a victim. Yes, bad things happened, but they didn’t define me. I had the power to change my story and take charge of my life.

And you know what? The moment I stopped seeing myself as a victim, I began attracting positive and supportive people.

So, if you’re caught in the victim mindset, remember: You’re more powerful than you realize. You have the ability to shape your destiny. Embrace this, and you’ll see a shift in the type of people you attract.

8) Being too nice

Yes, you read that right. There’s such a thing as being too nice, and it can attract toxic people.

Don’t get me wrong, kindness is wonderful. But when you’re so nice that you let others walk all over you, you become a prime target for toxic individuals.

These people often take advantage of your good nature, manipulate your kindness, and exploit it for their own gain.

The trick is to balance being kind with being firm. Be good to others, but also be good to yourself. Don’t let your kindness become a weakness that others can exploit.

9) Holding onto past hurts

We’ve all been hurt in the past. But holding onto that pain can make us vulnerable to toxic people. They can sense our unresolved issues and use them to their advantage.

Holding onto past hurts also prevents us from forming healthy relationships. We’re so focused on protecting ourselves from being hurt again that we don’t allow ourselves to be open to new, positive experiences.

The key is forgiveness. Letting go of past hurts doesn’t mean forgetting or condoning what happened. It simply means releasing the hold it has on you.

Remember, your past does not define your future. You have the power to break free from old wounds and create a healthier, happier life for yourself.

10) Not valuing yourself

At the heart of attracting or repelling toxic people is one fundamental truth: the way you value yourself.

If you don’t value yourself, you’ll accept less than you deserve. You’ll allow toxic people to treat you poorly because, deep down, you don’t believe you’re worthy of better.

On the other hand, when you truly value yourself, you set a high standard for how you’re treated. You won’t tolerate being disrespected or taken advantage of.

And this sends a clear message to toxic people that they can’t manipulate or control you.

Understanding the law of attraction

The law of attraction suggests that similar energies attract each other. When you genuinely respect and value yourself, you naturally radiate a positive energy that attracts others who share that self-respect and value.

Conversely, when you lack self-value, you’re more likely to draw in people who won’t appreciate you either. These often turn out to be toxic individuals who can drain your energy and bring negativity into your life.

Now, changing these behaviors isn’t a quick fix. It takes conscious effort, self-reflection, and time. But every step you take toward adjusting these behaviors brings you closer to a life surrounded by positive, uplifting people.

Remember, the most vital relationship you’ll ever have is the one with yourself. Treat yourself kindly, respect your boundaries, and value who you are. When you embody these qualities, you naturally repel toxic individuals and attract those who appreciate and respect the real you.