Have you ever felt like something’s holding you back from being your best self?

I’ve been there too. Over the years, I’ve put a lot of thought into personal growth—exploring what makes someone truly valuable, not just to others but to themselves. And what I’ve realized is that while building good habits is crucial, sometimes it’s what we stop doing that makes all the difference.

We all have behaviors that chip away at our potential. And the more we hold on to these habits, the more they weigh us down.

But the good news?

By recognizing and saying goodbye to just a handful of behaviors, you can instantly raise your value and set yourself up for a life of greater confidence, connection, and fulfillment.

Today, we’re going to explore 7 of these behaviors. Cutting these out has made a world of difference in my life—and they just might do the same for you.

Let’s dive in.

1) Being judgmental

No one likes to be judged, but we often judge others without realizing it.

This is not only detrimental to our relationships, but it also inhibits our own capacity for growth and understanding.

Judgment creates a barrier between us and the people around us. It limits our ability to genuinely connect with others and understand their perspectives.

If you want to elevate your value as a person, the first behavior you need to ditch is being judgmental. Instead, strive to be more understanding and open-minded.

Everyone has their own story. Let’s give them the space to tell it.

2) Being ungrateful

When was the last time you took a moment to appreciate the things and people around you?

Overlooking gratitude is one of those behaviors that quietly holds us back from experiencing true fulfillment. We often get so caught up in our day-to-day routines and challenges that we forget to pause and reflect on what’s going right.

But gratitude isn’t just about saying “thank you” more often—it’s about developing a mindset of appreciation that can transform how you see yourself and others.

As noted by the folks at HelpGuide, practicing gratitude can lead to higher self-esteem and improved patience. They also point out that “expressing your appreciation for a friend or family member shows them that you care and opens the door for more positive interactions in the future.”

By taking time to recognize what you’re grateful for—whether it’s jotting down a few things each morning or verbally expressing it to someone—you not only enrich your relationships but also raise your own sense of value.

Gratitude grounds us keeps us focused on the positives and allows us to embrace life with a more open heart.

3) Procrastinating

Procrastination is a foe we all know too well. It’s a habit that doesn’t just affect our productivity, but also our perception of self-worth.

I’m no stranger to this behavior. I remember a time when I had an important project to finish. Instead of working on it, I found myself aimlessly surfing the internet, watching TV shows, and doing everything but the task at hand.

Days turned into weeks, and the deadline loomed closer. The stress was almost unbearable, and my self-esteem took a hit. I felt like I was letting myself down.

Once I finally decided to bid farewell to procrastination, things changed dramatically. Not only did my productivity skyrocket, but I also started feeling better about myself.

Saying goodbye to it might just do the same for you.

4) Not listening

Do you know what makes a great conversationalist?

It’s not about what you say but mostly how well you listen.

When we don’t listen to others, we dismiss their thoughts and emotions. This can make them feel unvalued and disregarded, which can damage our relationships.

On the other hand, active listening shows respect and understanding. It makes the other person feel heard and appreciated, instantly raising your value in their eyes.

As wisely put by Stoic philosopher Epictetus, “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.” Start paying full attention to what others are saying, show empathy, and respond thoughtfully.

5) Comparing yourself to others

In a world filled with social media highlights, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves with others.

But here’s the truth: we all have our unique paths, challenges, and victories. Our journey cannot be compared to anyone else’s.

As  Theodore Roosevelt noted, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” It dims our light and keeps us from recognizing our own worth.

Embrace your individuality, celebrate your accomplishments, and love yourself as you are. After all, there’s only one you in this world, and you are enough.

6) Avoiding difficult conversations

This one hits close to home for me.

There was a time when I would go to great lengths to avoid any form of confrontation or difficult conversation. I erroneously believed that by doing so, I was keeping the peace and maintaining my relationships.

However, I’ve come to realize that this avoidance was actually causing more harm than good. It was preventing me from resolving issues, expressing my feelings, and establishing deeper connections with others.

Avoiding difficult conversations can be damaging in the long run. It hinders open communication, and can lead to misunderstandings and resentment.

It’s time to face those tough conversations head-on. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but the growth and understanding that come from it are truly invaluable.

7) Overlooking self-care

It’s easy to think of self-care as an optional luxury, something to be done when everything else is taken care of.

But the truth is, neglecting it can have far-reaching consequences on your well-being, your productivity, and, ultimately, your value as a person.

As noted by the folks at Choosing Therapy, self-care has a multitude of benefits, including increased patience, higher self-esteem, improved productivity, and happier relationships.

You could think of these as an ingredient list to boost your value!

When you’re well-rested, emotionally balanced, and healthy, you’re able to show up as the best version of yourself for others and, more importantly, for you.

Whether it’s taking a walk, practicing mindfulness, or just allowing yourself a moment to breathe, making self-care a priority will not only enhance your life but also make you someone who can positively impact those around you.

You can’t pour from an empty cup. Make sure you’re filling yours regularly.

Final thoughts: It starts with you

Letting go of behaviors that hold you back is a powerful way to instantly raise your value and set yourself up for a more fulfilling life.

By focusing on self-awareness, gratitude, self-care, and other positive habits, you not only elevate how you see yourself but also how others perceive you.

But remember, transformation doesn’t happen overnight—it’s a journey. Start small, take one step at a time, and watch as each shift brings you closer to being the best version of yourself.

You’ve got this!