Perfectionism can be a real growth killer. Trust me, I’ve been there.

Chasing perfection, you often find yourself stuck in a cycle of dissatisfaction, always feeling like nothing you do is good enough. You’re spending precious time fixating on every tiny detail, when you could be moving forward, learning and growing.

Let’s be clear, striving for excellence is not a bad thing. But when it turns into an obsessive need for perfection, it can really hold you back.

In this article “If you want to grow, let go of these perfectionist habits”, we’ll dive into some of the most damaging habits that perfectionists often fall into. And don’t worry, I’ll also share some practical tips on how to break free from them.

Ready to leave perfectionism behind and embrace growth? Let’s delve in.

1) Fear of making mistakes

The first perfectionist habit to break free from is the fear of making mistakes.

Perfectionists often have an intense fear of failure. They see mistakes as proof of their inadequacy rather than learning opportunities. This can lead to a crippling fear of trying anything new or venturing outside of their comfort zone.

But here’s the thing – growth happens outside of our comfort zones. Mistakes are not failures, they’re stepping stones on the path to success. Every mistake you make is a lesson learned, a chance to improve and grow.

So if you want to grow, you need to let go of this fear. Embrace the possibility of making mistakes. See them as an integral part of your journey towards growth and improvement.

Remember, nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes – and that’s perfectly okay. It’s how we learn, adapt, and ultimately grow.

So don’t let the fear of making mistakes hold you back. Step out of your comfort zone, take risks, make mistakes, learn from them, and keep moving forward. Because that’s how growth happens.

2) Over-planning

Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, I was known among my friends as the “over-planner”.

For every trip, event, or project, I had a detailed plan in place. Every minute was accounted for, every possible scenario was considered and planned for. It was exhausting. And you know what? Things rarely went according to my plan.

Over-planning is another common perfectionist habit that stifles growth. It’s born out of a desire to control every aspect of a situation to ensure everything is perfect.

But life is unpredictable. No matter how well you plan, things will happen that you didn’t anticipate. And when they do, they can throw your perfect plan into disarray, causing stress and anxiety.

What I’ve learned from my over-planning days is that while it’s good to have a plan, it’s also important to be flexible and adaptable.

Now, instead of obsessively planning every detail, I set clear goals and make a rough plan. But I’m always open to change and ready to adapt when things don’t go as planned.

Learning this lesson has not only reduced my stress levels but also opened me up to new experiences and opportunities for growth that I would have missed out on if I had stuck rigidly to my plans. So if you’re an over-planner like I used to be, try loosening up a bit. You’ll be surprised at how much more you can grow.

3) All-or-nothing thinking

All-or-nothing thinking is a cognitive distortion that perfectionists often fall into. This is when you see things in black and white, with no shades of grey in between.

For example, if you don’t get a perfect score on a test, you might think you’re a complete failure, ignoring the fact that you still did well. Or if you can’t do a workout perfectly, you might decide not to do it at all.

But did you know that the human brain isn’t wired for this kind of thinking? Neuroscientists have found that the brain is actually more flexible and adaptable than we once thought. This concept, known as neuroplasticity, means our brains can change and adapt as we learn and experience new things.

This is good news for those stuck in all-or-nothing thinking. It means that with practice and conscious effort, you can train your brain to think differently.

Instead of seeing things in black and white, try to see the shades of grey. Recognize that there’s a spectrum between success and failure, and it’s okay to fall somewhere in the middle.

Remember, growth isn’t about achieving perfection. It’s about progress, about getting a little bit better each day. So let go of all-or-nothing thinking and embrace the beautiful messiness of growth.

4) Self-criticism

Self-criticism is another habit that perfectionists often have. They hold themselves to impossibly high standards and beat themselves up when they don’t meet them.

But here’s the thing – being hard on yourself doesn’t make you better. In fact, research shows that it can actually hinder your performance and well-being.

Self-criticism generates negative emotions, which can drain your energy, reduce your motivation, and impair your performance. It can also make you more prone to stress, anxiety, and depression.

On the other hand, self-compassion – being kind and understanding towards yourself when you fail or make mistakes – has been linked to increased motivation, improved performance, better emotional resilience, and greater overall well-being.

So if you want to grow, let go of self-criticism and practice self-compassion instead. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a friend.

Remember, everyone makes mistakes and has flaws. It’s part of being human. Accept yourself as you are, warts and all, and use your mistakes as opportunities for growth and learning.

So next time you find yourself being hard on yourself, stop. Take a deep breath. Remind yourself that it’s okay to be imperfect. Be gentle with yourself. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough.

5) Procrastination

Procrastination is a common habit among perfectionists. They often delay starting a task because they’re afraid they won’t be able to do it perfectly.

But here’s the catch – the longer you procrastinate, the less time you have to complete the task. This can lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy where you end up not doing as well as you could have because you didn’t give yourself enough time.

Moreover, procrastination can prevent you from taking action and moving forward. It can keep you stuck in one place, hindering your growth and development.

If you want to grow, you need to let go of procrastination. Start by breaking down large tasks into smaller, manageable steps. Focus on one step at a time and take action, no matter how small.

Remember, progress, not perfection, is the goal. Even small steps forward are still steps in the right direction. So stop waiting for the perfect moment or the perfect plan, and start taking action today.

Because in the end, it’s not about doing things perfectly. It’s about doing them consistently. And consistency is key to growth.

6) Seeking validation

Many perfectionists have a habit of seeking external validation. They rely on praise, approval, or recognition from others to feel good about themselves.

But here’s the heartfelt truth – your worth is not defined by what others think of you. It comes from within. It’s about knowing who you are, embracing your strengths and weaknesses, and loving yourself unconditionally.

Seeking validation from others can make you lose touch with your own values and desires. It can make you live your life according to other people’s expectations, rather than following your own path.

If you want to grow, you need to let go of the need for external validation. Start by practicing self-love and self-acceptance. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Acknowledge your efforts and progress, not just the end results.

Remember, you are enough just as you are. You don’t need anyone else’s approval or recognition to validate your worth.

So next time you find yourself seeking validation from others, remind yourself that the only approval you need is your own. Trust yourself. Believe in yourself. Love yourself. Because you are worthy, and you are enough.

7) Fear of rejection

I used to have a deep-rooted fear of rejection. It was so powerful that it prevented me from trying new things, sharing my ideas, or expressing my feelings. I was so worried about being rejected or judged by others that I often held myself back.

Fear of rejection is a common trait among perfectionists. They’re afraid that if they’re not perfect, they’ll be rejected or judged by others.

But here’s what I’ve learned – rejection is not the end of the world. It’s just a part of life. And more often than not, it’s a reflection of the other person’s preferences or circumstances, rather than a judgement of your worth.

Overcoming the fear of rejection has been one of the biggest steps in my personal growth journey. It has freed me to take risks, express myself, and live authentically.

So if you’re held back by the fear of rejection, let it go. Remember that you are worthy and deserving, regardless of other people’s opinions or reactions.

Take risks. Express your ideas. Share your feelings. Live authentically. Because in the end, it’s better to be rejected for being true to yourself than to be accepted for pretending to be someone you’re not.

8) Comparison with others

In our social media-driven world, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves with others. We see the highlight reels of people’s lives and feel like we’re not doing enough, not achieving enough, not good enough.

But here’s the truth – comparison is the thief of joy. It can make you feel inadequate and unhappy, and it can prevent you from appreciating your own achievements and progress.

If you want to grow, let go of the habit of comparing yourself with others. Instead, focus on your own journey. Celebrate your own achievements. Appreciate your own progress.

Remember, everyone is on their own unique path in life. Your journey is not meant to be a replica of anyone else’s. Your worth is not determined by how you stack up against others, but by how true you are to yourself.

So next time you find yourself comparing your life with someone else’s, remind yourself that you are on your own unique journey. Celebrate your progress, cherish your achievements, and be proud of who you are.

9) Not taking care of yourself

The most important thing I want you to take away from this is the importance of self-care. Perfectionists often push themselves too hard, neglecting their physical, emotional, and mental well-being in the pursuit of perfection.

But here’s a crucial truth – you can’t pour from an empty cup. You can’t give your best if you’re not at your best. And you can’t grow if you’re not taking care of yourself.

Self-care is not selfish. It’s not a luxury. It’s a necessity. It’s about taking care of your body, mind, and spirit so that you can show up as your best self and live your best life.

So make self-care a priority. Take time to rest and recharge. Eat healthy, exercise regularly, get enough sleep. Do things that bring you joy and fulfillment.

And remember, it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. It’s okay to set boundaries and say no to things that drain you.

Because in the end, growth is not just about achieving more or doing more. It’s about being more – being healthier, happier, and more fulfilled. And that starts with taking care of yourself.

Final thoughts: Growth is a journey

In the end, what truly matters is understanding that growth is a journey, not a destination. It’s about progress, not perfection.

Research from the field of positive psychology suggests that people who focus on personal growth tend to be more satisfied with their lives. They are more resilient, more adaptable, and generally happier.

Letting go of perfectionist habits is not about lowering your standards or settling for mediocrity. It’s about shifting your focus from being perfect to being better.

It’s about embracing your imperfections, learning from your mistakes, and seeing challenges as opportunities for growth. It’s about being kind to yourself, embracing your uniqueness, and celebrating your progress.

And most importantly, it’s about understanding that you are enough just as you are.

So as you move forward in your journey of growth, remember to be patient with yourself. Change takes time. Be persistent, but also be gentle with yourself.

Because in the end, growth is not just about becoming a better version of yourself. It’s also about loving and accepting the person you are right now.