There’s a huge difference between inner contentment and mere fleeting happiness.

The difference boils down to choices. Finding true inner contentment is about letting go of the things that are holding you back, not just pursuing temporary pleasure.

Working towards contentment allows you to make decisions that align with your core values and bring long-term satisfaction, rather than quick fixes.

Finding inner contentment is all about identifying what’s causing unrest in your life and making conscious decisions to change. And trust me, there are certain habits that can hinder your journey towards inner peace.

Here are some things you might want to stop doing if you’re serious about finding true contentment.

1) Comparing yourself to others

There aren’t many habits more destructive to finding inner contentment than comparing ourselves to others.

And trust me, this is a trap we all fall into more often than we’d like to admit.

Often, you’ll find yourself looking at someone else’s life – their success, their happiness, their possessions – and wondering why you don’t have the same. This comparison game can take a serious toll on your mental wellbeing.

Welcome to the concept of self-comparison.

Self-comparison is the act of measuring our own worth based on what we see in others. And it is not only damaging, but also unrealistic. Because what we see is often only the highlight reel of someone else’s life, not the full picture.

Think about it. It’s the idea behind every envy-inducing Instagram post, every flawless Facebook update.

When confronted with images of other people’s ‘perfect’ lives, it’s easy to feel inadequate and unhappy with our own circumstances.

So if you want to find inner contentment, it can be incredibly helpful to stop comparing yourself to others.

Remember that everyone has their own journey and their own struggles. Focus on your own path instead. It’s not about being better than anyone else, it’s about being the best version of yourself.

But be warned, this isn’t an overnight fix. It requires conscious effort. But I assure you, it’s worth it.

2) Holding onto past mistakes

I can tell you from personal experience, holding onto past mistakes is one of the most damaging things you can do to your inner peace.

I remember a time when I messed up a big project at work. It was a mistake that cost me a promotion and for a long time, I couldn’t forgive myself. I kept replaying the scenario in my head, thinking about all the things I could have done differently.

That was until I realized that no amount of regret or self-blame could change the past. It only robbed me of my present happiness and contentment.

We all make mistakes, it’s part of being human. But holding onto those mistakes, letting them define us, is a choice we make. And it’s a choice that can keep us stuck in the past and prevent us from moving forward.

The key to finding inner contentment is learning to accept our past mistakes, learn from them, and then let them go.

It took me a while to forgive myself for that work blunder, but once I did, it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I was able to focus on the present and work towards my future without that nagging feeling of regret holding me back.

So trust me on this one, let go of past mistakes. They’re not worth sacrificing your inner contentment over.

3) Ignoring your physical health

Believe it or not, our physical health has a huge impact on our mental and emotional wellbeing.

When we neglect our bodies – whether it’s through poor nutrition, lack of exercise, or not getting enough sleep – it can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and discontent.

Our bodies and minds are interconnected. A study in the Journal of Health Psychology found that people who exercise regularly have better mental health and emotional wellbeing. This includes lower levels of stress, depression and anxiety.

Exercise doesn’t just make us physically stronger, it also boosts our mood by releasing endorphins, the body’s natural ‘feel-good’ chemicals.

Similarly, a balanced diet can improve our mood and energy levels. And a good night’s sleep can do wonders for our mental clarity and emotional stability.

So if you’re chasing inner contentment, don’t neglect your physical health. Make time for regular exercise, eat a balanced diet, and ensure you’re getting enough sleep. Your body and your mind will thank you.

4) Neglecting personal relationships

In the hustle and bustle of life, it’s easy to let our personal relationships slide. Whether it’s with family, friends or a significant other, maintaining these connections requires time and effort.

However, neglecting these relationships can lead to feelings of isolation and discontent. Humans are social creatures by nature. We thrive on connection, communication and companionship.

These relationships provide us with emotional support, help us feel understood and valued, and give us a sense of belonging. They offer a safe space where we can be ourselves without fear of judgment.

So if you’re seeking inner contentment, make sure to nurture your personal relationships. Set time aside for family dinners, catch up with friends regularly, and make sure your loved ones know how much they mean to you.

Remember, at the end of the day, it’s not what we have in life, but who we have in our life that matters.

5) Living in the future

We all have goals and ambitions – that’s a great thing. But sometimes, in our quest for the future we desire, we forget to live in the present.

Focusing too much on the future can make us anxious and discontent. We become so consumed with what we want to achieve that we forget to appreciate what we already have.

It’s important to plan and strive for our goals, but it’s equally important to enjoy the journey. Life is happening right now, in this very moment. And if we’re always looking ahead, we miss out on the beauty of the present.

So if you’re seeking inner contentment, try to balance your future aspirations with present contentment. Set your goals, but also take time to appreciate the here and now.

Remember, life isn’t just about the destination; it’s about the journey too.

6) Not expressing gratitude

In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to overlook the simple things that bring us joy. We become so focused on what’s missing in our lives that we forget to appreciate what we already have.

Gratitude is a powerful tool for finding inner contentment. It shifts our focus from what our life lacks to the abundance that’s already present.

Take a moment each day to reflect on the things you’re thankful for. It could be as big as a loving family, or as small as a warm cup of coffee on a cold morning.

By practicing gratitude regularly, you’ll start to realize how rich you are in so many ways. This shift in perspective can lead to an increased sense of contentment and peace.

So remember, no matter where you are in life, there’s always something to be grateful for. And acknowledging these blessings can make a world of difference to your inner peace.

7) Trying to control everything

Life is unpredictable, and that’s the beauty of it. But there was a time when this unpredictability used to keep me up at night. I would try to plan everything down to the last detail, hoping to avoid any unexpected surprises.

I soon realized that this need for control was not only impossible but also exhausting. It was robbing me of my peace and making me constantly anxious.

The truth is, we can’t control everything. Life will always throw curveballs at us, and that’s okay. What we can control is how we react to these situations.

Embracing the unpredictability of life can be liberating. It allows us to live in the moment, accept things as they come and find peace in the midst of chaos.

So if you’re striving for inner contentment, try to let go of the need to control everything. Instead, learn to ride the waves of life with grace and resilience. It may not always be easy, but it’s definitely worth it.

8) Being too hard on yourself

We all strive for perfection in different aspects of our lives. But sometimes, in our pursuit of perfection, we end up being our own harshest critics.

Being too hard on yourself can lead to feelings of unworthiness and discontent. It’s important to remember that nobody is perfect, and it’s okay to make mistakes.

Self-compassion is key to finding inner contentment. It’s about acknowledging your flaws and failures, but also recognizing your growth and achievements.

So take it easy on yourself. Celebrate your victories, no matter how small they may seem. Forgive yourself for your mistakes and learn from them instead of beating yourself up.

Remember, you are a work in progress, and every step forward, no matter how small, is a step in the right direction.

10) Ignoring your own needs

The most crucial thing to remember on your journey to inner contentment is this; you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Too often, we neglect our own needs in the process of taking care of others. But it’s important to realize that taking care of yourself is not selfish, it’s necessary.

Whether it’s setting boundaries, taking time for self-care, or pursuing a passion, make sure your needs are being met.

Listening to your body and feeding your soul is essential for inner contentment. So don’t ignore your needs. Nurture yourself, and watch as your inner peace and contentment flourish.

Final thoughts: It’s a journey

The path to inner contentment is not always a straightforward one. It’s filled with twists and turns, trials and triumphs. It’s a journey that requires self-awareness, patience, and above all, kindness towards oneself.

The very fact that you’re reading this article shows that you’ve already taken the first step on this journey. You’ve acknowledged the need for change and that’s more than half the battle won.

Each of the habits we’ve discussed here are part of a broader shift towards self-love and acceptance. And while it’s important to work on them, remember that change takes time. Don’t rush it.

As Carl Rogers, one of the most influential psychologists of the 20th century said, “The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.”

So take each day as it comes, celebrate your small victories, learn from your setbacks, and most importantly, enjoy the ride.

After all, the journey to inner contentment is just as beautiful as the destination itself.