There’s a huge distinction between feeling truly content and merely getting by in life.

This difference lies in our behaviors. Some habits might seem insignificant, but they have the power to cloud our contentment and leave us perpetually dissatisfied.

Letting go of these behaviors is not about restricting ourselves, but rather about paving the way for genuine happiness and peace.

In this article, I’m going to walk you through 9 behaviors you need to say goodbye to if you truly want to feel contentment in life. Trust me, saying goodbye to these behaviors might just be your first step towards a more fulfilling life.

1) Constant comparison

We live in a world that’s driven by competition and comparison. Social media platforms are filled with people showcasing their best lives, often leading us to compare our lives with theirs.

This habit of constant comparison is like a thief that steals our joy and contentment. It’s easy to feel like you’re not good enough or not achieving enough when you’re always measuring your life against someone else’s highlight reel.

The truth is, there will always be someone doing better than you in some aspect of life. But remember, we all have our own unique path and pace in life.

If you truly want to feel contentment, it’s crucial to stop comparing yourself with others. Instead, focus on your own journey, your own growth. Celebrate your successes, learn from your failures, and strive to be the best version of yourself.

Saying goodbye to the habit of constant comparison might not be easy, but it’s certainly worth the effort for the sake of your happiness and contentment.

2) Living in the past

I’ve learned from personal experience that dwelling on past mistakes or regrets is a surefire way to prevent contentment. There was a time when I would replay past events over and over in my head, thinking about what I could have done differently.

One day, I had an epiphany. I realized that no amount of regret could change what had happened. All it did was rob me of my present joy and peace.

From that moment, I made a conscious decision to let go of the past and focus on what’s happening right now, in the present moment.

I won’t say it was easy, but this shift in my mindset has made a remarkable difference in my life. I feel lighter, happier, and more content.

If you’re constantly living in the past, it’s time to say goodbye to that behavior. Remember, you cannot change the past, but you can control how you react to it. Embrace the present and look forward to the future with positivity and hope.

3) Neglecting self-care

In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life while neglecting our own health and wellbeing. However, did you know that there’s a strong correlation between self-care and overall happiness?

A study by the University of Otago in New Zealand found that participants who engaged in regular self-care activities, such as physical exercise and adequate sleep, reported better mood and lower stress levels.

This means that if you’re always putting others first or sacrificing your needs for work, it’s time to rethink your priorities. Prioritizing self-care isn’t selfish; it’s essential for your physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing.

Start by incorporating small acts of self-care into your daily routine – it could be a 10-minute walk in the park, a warm bath at the end of a long day, or simply taking time to enjoy a cup of coffee. These little things can make a big difference in your overall sense of contentment.

4) Seeking approval from others

Many of us have a tendency to seek validation and approval from those around us. We want to be liked, appreciated, and accepted, and there’s nothing wrong with that. The problem arises when we start depending on others’ approval for our self-worth.

The fact is, you can’t please everyone. People have different opinions and perspectives, and that’s perfectly okay. What’s not okay is to let others’ opinions define your worth or dictate your happiness.

To feel true contentment in life, it’s essential to say goodbye to the behavior of constantly seeking approval from others. Instead, learn to trust yourself, value your own opinions, and make decisions based on what feels right for you.

Remember, your worth is not determined by others’ opinions of you but by how you see yourself. Embrace your individuality, believe in your abilities, and most importantly, love yourself for who you are.

5) Holding onto grudges

Holding onto grudges is like carrying a heavy load on your shoulders. It weighs you down, drains your energy and prevents you from moving forward.

I’ve seen people, including myself, hold onto anger and resentment for years. But what I’ve realized is that this behavior only hurts me and hinders my happiness.

When you forgive, you are not saying that what someone did was okay. Instead, you’re choosing to release the negative emotions that are holding you back. It’s about giving yourself the peace and contentment you deserve.

So if you’ve been clinging to old grudges, it might be time to let them go. As the saying goes, “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Choose forgiveness, not for them, but for your own peace and happiness.

6) Chasing perfection

In life, there’s this underlying pressure to be perfect. We strive for the perfect career, the perfect relationships, the perfect body, and the list goes on. But you know what? Perfection is an illusion.

Chasing after perfection is like chasing a mirage in the desert. No matter how much you run towards it, it continues to be just out of reach.

In my experience, the pursuit of perfection often leads to stress, anxiety and a sense of never being good enough.

Instead, let’s embrace our flaws and imperfections. They make us who we are- unique and beautiful in our own ways.

It’s time to shift our focus from being perfect to being authentic. Let’s celebrate our efforts, progress and small victories instead of dwelling on what we lack or what we haven’t achieved yet.

Only when we stop chasing the illusion of perfection can we truly appreciate ourselves and find contentment in our lives.

7) Avoiding challenges

There was a time in my life when I would shy away from challenges. Anything that seemed too difficult or outside my comfort zone, I would avoid it. I thought it was the best way to keep my life stress-free and smooth. But, boy, was I wrong.

Avoiding challenges didn’t make my life easier; instead, it made me feel stagnant and unfulfilled. I realized that by avoiding challenges, I was also avoiding growth and opportunities.

Now, whenever a challenge comes my way, I see it as an opportunity to learn, grow and become stronger. Yes, it might be uncomfortable and hard, but that’s where the magic happens.

If you’re someone who avoids challenges or fears failure, it’s time to shift your perspective. See challenges as stepping stones to success and personal growth. Trust me; the sense of satisfaction and contentment you’ll feel after overcoming a challenge is incomparable.

8) Overthinking

Overthinking is a trap that many of us fall into. It’s like a loop that plays the same worries and fears in our minds over and over again.

Overthinking doesn’t solve problems or change outcomes; it only creates stress and anxiety. It keeps us stuck in our heads, disconnected from the present moment.

If you find yourself overthinking often, it’s time to break this habit. Start by practicing mindfulness – being fully present and engaged in the current moment. It can be as simple as focusing on your breath, or immersing yourself in nature.

Life is happening right now, in this very moment. Don’t let overthinking rob you of the joy and contentment of living fully in the present.

9) Neglecting relationships

At the end of the day, life is about connections and relationships. It’s about the people we love, the friendships we cherish, and the memories we create together.

Neglecting these relationships for the sake of work or other pursuits can leave us feeling empty and unfulfilled. No achievement or success can replace the joy and contentment that comes from meaningful relationships.

So, cherish your loved ones, nurture your friendships, and invest time in building strong connections. These relationships are what truly enrich our lives and bring lasting contentment.

Final thoughts: It’s all about choice

The journey towards contentment is deeply personal and unique to each of us. But if there’s one universal truth, it’s this: our behaviors and choices play a significant role in our overall happiness.

Research by Sonja Lyubomirsky, a professor of psychology at the University of California, suggests that our actions and thoughts influence about 40% of our personal happiness. This means that we have an incredible power to shape our own happiness and contentment.

Each of the behaviors we’ve discussed today is a choice. Choosing to let go of comparison, to embrace the present, to prioritize self-care, and to nurture relationships isn’t always easy. But it’s these choices that pave the way for a life of contentment.