Growing older can sometimes feel like one of life’s cruel jokes.

In a world obsessed with youth and vitality, it might seem like appreciation for you is dwindling as the years roll by.

More often than not, people might overlook your wisdom and experience and instead focus on your graying hair or deepening wrinkles.

In fact, you’ve probably felt undervalued or unacknowledged more times than you care to remember.

Sound familiar? 

If it does, keep on reading as we discuss the 10 habits you need to say goodbye to if you want to feel more appreciated as you get older.

Let’s dive in.

1) You’re stuck in your ways

As we get older, we tend to become more set in our habits—comfortable with the familiar and resistant to change. However, this rigid mindset might be limiting the appreciation you receive.

By being unwilling to adapt or open up to new experiences, you could be perceived as stubborn or inflexible. This can lead to people feeling frustrated or disconnected from you.

The reality is, though, that you might just be attached to your routine, not realizing its impact on how you’re perceived.

Embracing change and flexibility doesn’t mean changing who you are. It means being open to growth and new experiences—showing those around you that age doesn’t equate to stagnation.

By letting go of this habit, you not only make room for more appreciation but also for personal growth and new possibilities.

2) You’re not speaking up for yourself

I remember a time when I would always agree to do things I didn’t want to, just because I didn’t want to disappoint others. I would find myself overwhelmed and resentful, feeling unappreciated for all the things I was doing.

The truth was, people were unintentionally taking me for granted because I wasn’t expressing my needs or setting boundaries.

When you constantly put others before yourself without voicing your own desires, it can lead to feelings of being undervalued and underappreciated.

You might think you’re being kind or selfless, but there is a fine line between being generous and letting people unknowingly take advantage of your good nature.

Once I started to assert myself and express my needs clearly, I noticed a shift. People began to appreciate my efforts more because they understood the sacrifices I was making.

So, start speaking up for yourself. It’s not about being selfish—it’s about ensuring your needs are met, too. You’ll find that when you do this, people will not only respect you more but also appreciate you more for the value you bring to their lives.

3) You’re neglecting self-care

Often, we tend to place ourselves last on the priority list, especially when it comes to taking care of our physical and mental health. This can lead to a decline in our overall well-being and, consequently, how appreciated we feel.

When you take care of yourself, you’re in a better position to take care of others.

By neglecting self-care, you might be unintentionally communicating that your needs are not important. This can lead others to undervalue you as well.

Therefore, prioritizing self-care is not only essential for your health but also for boosting your sense of appreciation.

4) You’re not communicating your value

We live in a society that often equates youth with value, overlooking the wisdom and experience that come with age. Because of this, it’s important to be your own advocate and showcase the unique strengths and insights you bring to the table.

However, this doesn’t mean you should boast or brag about your accomplishments. Rather, it’s about gracefully sharing your experiences, knowledge, and skills in a way that adds value to others.

People can’t appreciate what they don’t know or understand. By communicating your value effectively, you help others see the unique contributions you offer. 

5) You’re holding onto grudges

Let’s get real for a moment. 

Grudges can make us bitter, cynical, and closed-off, causing us to push people away rather than invite them in. When we’re consumed by past wrongs, we’re less likely to see the genuine appreciation and goodwill offered to us in the present.

The truth is, holding grudges doesn’t punish the person who wronged us—it punishes us. It keeps us stuck in a cycle of negativity that can blind us to the appreciation we receive.

So, it’s time to let go.

Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing the harm done to you. It means freeing yourself from the burden of resentment and opening up to positivity and appreciation.

It’s tough, but the peace it brings is worth it.

6) You’re comparing yourself to others

In this age of social media, where people’s lives are often presented as perfect, it’s all too easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others. This habit can be particularly harmful as we age and can significantly impact our sense of self-worth and appreciation.

The thing is, comparison is a game no one ever wins. There will always be someone who seems happier, wealthier, more successful, or more appreciated. But keep in mind, what you see online is often a carefully curated highlight reel, not the full story.

It’s important to know that everyone has their own unique journey, complete with ups and downs. Your value isn’t determined by how you stack up against someone else. You bring your own unique strengths and experiences to the table.

So, be kind to yourself. Instead of comparing yourself to others, focus on celebrating your own growth and achievements. 

7) You’re overlooking your own accomplishments

Let’s face it, we’re often our own worst critics. We push ourselves hard, always striving for the next big thing, and in the process, we tend to overlook our own accomplishments. 

Think about it.

How often have you downplayed your successes, attributing them to luck or timing instead of acknowledging your own effort and skill? 

Maybe you’ve finished a big project at work, helped a friend through a tough time, or even mastered a new recipe. These are all accomplishments worth celebrating, no matter how small they may seem.

Your accomplishments are not just defined by grand gestures or significant milestones. They’re also found in the everyday victories and the small steps you take towards your goals.

So, start giving yourself credit where credit is due. Celebrate your wins and recognize your efforts. Not only will this boost your self-esteem, but it can also help others see and appreciate your achievements too.

8) You’re forgetting to laugh

Believe it or not, one habit that might be standing in the way of you feeling more appreciated is forgetting to laugh. Yes, you heard it right!

Laughter truly is the best medicine, and as we age, keeping our sense of humor can make all the difference.

Life comes with its fair share of ups and downs, and as we get older, the downs can sometimes feel a bit heavier. But maintaining a positive attitude and the ability to laugh at life’s absurdities can make us more approachable and appreciated.

Think about it. Aren’t the people who make us laugh some of our most treasured companions? Laughter brings people together, breaks down barriers, and fosters connection.

So go ahead, embrace your silliness, find joy in the little things, and don’t be afraid to share a hearty laugh. It’s not just good for your soul, but also a great way to invite appreciation from those around you. 

After all, who doesn’t love being around someone who lightens up their day?

9) You’re not setting boundaries

Too often, we fall into the trap of saying “yes” to everything, whether it’s taking on more work than we can handle or agreeing to social engagements we’d rather avoid. We do this in the hopes of pleasing others, but at what cost?

The truth is, when you don’t set boundaries, you allow others to dictate your time, energy, and even your worth. This not only leads to burnout but can also leave you feeling less appreciated and taken advantage of.

It’s time to put a stop to this. Setting boundaries isn’t about being selfish or unkind—it’s about respecting your own needs and limits.

And guess what? When you respect yourself enough to set boundaries, others will start respecting and appreciating you more too.

So no more excuses. Start saying “no” when you need to and don’t apologize for it. It might be uncomfortable at first, but trust me, it’s a game-changer.

10) You’re not appreciating yourself

At the end of the day, the most important habit to break if you want to feel more appreciated as you age— is not appreciating yourself.

The harsh reality is that you can’t control how others perceive or appreciate you. But what you can control is how you view and appreciate yourself.

When you appreciate yourself, you set the standard for how others should treat and appreciate you. Plus, it boosts your self-esteem, happiness, and overall well-being.

So start today. Look in the mirror and say something kind to yourself. Acknowledge your accomplishments, no matter how small.

Treat yourself with kindness and respect. Because ultimately, you deserve to be appreciated—and that starts with appreciating yourself.

Breaking Negative Patterns

To stop feeling undervalued as you age, it’s crucial to break established negative patterns like harsh self-criticism, comparisons with others, or spreading yourself too thin trying to please everyone. These behaviors often stem from deeply ingrained mindsets.

Ideapod founder Justin Brown unpacks the need to shift from self-negating mental models in a thought-provoking YouTube video. He examines how consciously rewriting our internal narratives creates space for more positivity and appreciation to enter our lives.

Justin emphasizes that while we cannot fully control external validation, we have agency in choosing how we talk to and frame ourselves. By focusing inward first, we start dismantling notions of the societal disregard for maturity. We recognize our wisdom as progress, not decline. And we open doors for others to acknowledge our value too.

Approaching aging with proactive empathy and compassion is key – for both ourselves and those around us.