If you want to come across as confident, stop using these 12 phrases

Ever found yourself in a room full of successful people, feeling less confident, and wondering why?
Chances are, you’ve been using certain phrases that are unintentionally undermining your confidence.
While it may seem trivial to some, the words we use can significantly impact how others perceive us, especially when it comes to projecting confidence.
Let’s dive right in and discover the 12 phrases you need to avoid if you want to come across as confident.
These might sound harmless to you, but trust me, eliminating them from your speech will do wonders for your self-esteem.
1. “I’m just”
We all have a habit of using certain phrases that we think are harmless, but one that can really undermine your confidence is “I’m just”.
Saying “I’m just” before your job title, actions, or opinions subtly devalues your worth and can make you come across as less confident.
This phrase suggests you’re downplaying your role or your thoughts, which can lead others to view you as less assertive or influential.
For instance, instead of saying “I’m just an intern,” say “I’m an intern.” Similarly, instead of saying “I’m just thinking,” say “I think”.
It’s a small change but dropping the “just” can make a significant difference in how people perceive you.
When you’re about to use “I’m just” in a sentence, pause and reconsider. Eliminating this phrase from your vocabulary is a simple yet effective way to project more confidence.
2. “I’m no expert, but…”
This is one phrase I’ve caught myself using more times than I’d like to admit.
Just like “I’m just”, the phrase “I’m no expert, but…” is another way of downplaying our knowledge or experience.
There was a time when I was discussing marketing strategies in a meeting. I had done my research and was confident about my suggestions, but instead of presenting them assertively, I started with, “I’m no expert, but…”.
This phrase immediately undermined my input and made it seem as though I was unsure about my ideas – even though I was quite confident.
And guess what? My suggestions were overlooked. It wasn’t until later that the team realized the value in the strategies I had proposed.
From that day on, I pledged to drop “I’m no expert” from my vocabulary and present my ideas confidently and assertively.
You don’t have to be an expert to have valuable ideas or opinions. Avoid using this phrase and stand by your contributions with confidence.
3. “Does that make sense?”
Asking for validation or reassurance can be a good thing in moderation; but if you find yourself constantly ending your statements with, “Does that make sense?”, it may signal a lack of confidence in your communication.
This phrase suggests that you’re unsure about the clarity or value of what you’ve just said, and you’re seeking approval or confirmation from others. It can give the impression that you doubt your own words.
Instead, if you want to ensure your audience understands your point, try rephrasing it into something like, “Do you need any clarification?” or “Any questions about this?” This way, you project confidence in your communication while still inviting feedback.
Confidence is about believing in what you say. So, trust that your words do make sense and allow others to ask for clarification if they need it.
4. “Sorry, but…”
The phrase “Sorry, but…” is often used as a precursor to a statement or opinion that one feels may not be well received.
Apologizing unnecessarily not only diminishes your confidence but also gives the impression that you’re in the wrong even before you’ve stated your point.
Instead of starting with an apology, try expressing your thoughts directly and assertively. For instance, instead of saying “Sorry, but I disagree,” you can simply say, “I see it differently,” or “I have a different perspective.”
There’s no need to apologize for having an opinion or a unique viewpoint. Be confident in expressing your thoughts without feeling the need to apologize first.
5. “I can’t”
“I can’t” is a powerful phrase that can severely limit your potential and confidence. It’s a self-defeating prophecy that convinces you of your incapabilities even before you’ve tried.
I’ve seen many people, including close friends, fall into the trap of saying “I can’t” even when they haven’t given themselves a chance. It’s heartbreaking to see them sell themselves short due to a lack of belief in their own abilities.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that we’re often capable of far more than we give ourselves credit for.
So instead of saying “I can’t,” try saying “I’ll try” or “I’ll learn.” Changing the language you use can shift your mindset towards growth and open up possibilities you might not have considered before.
Words are powerful and can shape our reality. Choose them wisely and make sure they reflect the confidence and capability that lies within you.
6. “This may be a stupid question…”
Ever started a question with this phrase? It’s an all too common way of undermining our own curiosity and intellect.
By prefacing your question with this phrase, you’re essentially apologizing for wanting to learn or understand something better. It suggests that you lack confidence in your ability to contribute to the conversation.
But here’s the thing: there’s no such thing as a stupid question. Questions are a sign of engagement and a desire to learn, and they should be encouraged, not belittled.
When you have a question, instead of downplaying its importance, ask it confidently.
Remember, every question is a step towards learning and growth, and there’s nothing stupid about that.
7. “It’s probably not that important…”
This phrase is another way we tend to downplay our thoughts or contributions. By using it, you’re suggesting that what you’re about to say isn’t valuable or worth listening to.
But here’s the truth: your thoughts, ideas, and feelings are important. You bring a unique perspective to the table, and it deserves to be heard.
Using this phrase can make it seem like you lack confidence in the value of your input. Instead of dismissing your thoughts as unimportant, assert them confidently.
For example, instead of saying “It’s probably not that important, but I think we should consider…”, try saying “I believe we should consider…”.
Confidence starts with valuing your own thoughts and ideas. So, stop assuming they’re unimportant and start asserting them with assurance.
8. “I guess…”
Starting a sentence with “I guess…” can make you come across as unsure or indecisive. It suggests you’re not fully committed to the idea you’re about to express and can undermine your confidence.
In a study conducted by Quantified Impressions, an organization that analyzes communication effectiveness, it was found that people rated speakers as more competent and likable when they used an assertive communication style.
Instead of saying “I guess we could try this approach,” say “Let’s try this approach.” It’s a small change in language that can significantly boost the confidence you project.
9. “I’ll try…”
“I’ll try…” is a phrase that I used to use quite often, especially when I was unsure of my abilities or hesitant about taking on a task.
But what I’ve realized over time is that “I’ll try…” often leaves a backdoor open for potential failure. It’s a safety net that doesn’t fully commit you to the task or goal at hand.
I’ve learned to replace “I’ll try…” with “I will…”. It’s a straightforward commitment to the task, and it communicates confidence in my own abilities to get it done.
Instead of saying “I’ll try to finish the project by Monday,” I now say, “I will finish the project by Monday.” The shift in language has made a noticeable difference in my confidence levels.
10. “It’s all my fault”
Taking responsibility for our actions is one thing, but blaming ourselves excessively can be damaging to our self-confidence.
The phrase “It’s all my fault” indicates a tendency to self-blame and can make you appear less confident. It’s important to remember that we all make mistakes and it’s rarely, if ever, entirely one person’s fault.
So instead of habitually taking the blame, acknowledge the mistake, learn from it, and focus on how to improve or rectify the situation.
Replace “It’s all my fault” with “Let’s see how we can fix this” or “Here’s what I’ve learned from this situation”. This encourages a growth mindset and projects confidence in your ability to handle challenges and learn from your mistakes.
11.”Hopefully…”
Using “hopefully” might seem like you’re being optimistic, but it actually can make you sound less confident.
It’s like you’re not quite sure if what you’re hoping for will really happen.
For example, saying “Hopefully, I’ll get the job” sounds like you’re not too sure about your chances.
Instead, try saying something more confident like, “I am looking forward to the possibility of getting the job.”
This way, you show that you’re hopeful but also confident in your abilities.
12. “If I’m honest…”
This phrase can make it sound like you’re not usually honest or that you’re not confident in what you’re about to say.
It’s as if you need to prepare people for your honesty, which shouldn’t be the case.
Honesty should be a given, not something you need to announce.
So, instead of saying, “If I’m honest, I don’t think this is a good idea,” you can say, “I believe this might not be the best approach.”
This approach keeps the honesty but drops the self-doubt.
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