There’s a line between happiness and frustration in any relationship. The key lies in the behaviors we choose to foster or let go.

Certain behaviors can create friction, while others can foster harmony. The trick is knowing which ones to say goodbye to.

Want to be truly happy in your relationship? It’s time to take a hard look at your habits. And don’t worry – I’ve got you covered!

In this article, I’ll share the nine behaviors to be truly happy in your relationship. Let’s start! 

1) Playing the blame game

It’s a common scenario in many relationships – a disagreement arises, and suddenly, it’s a full-blown blame game.

Pointing fingers, however, rarely solves anything. It often escalates conflict and creates a culture of defensiveness.

We all make mistakes. It’s part of being human. 

Focusing on who is at fault instead of what can be done to resolve the issue is a surefire way to breed resentment.

If you want a happier relationship, it’s time to say goodbye to the blame game. Instead, focus on understanding, compassion, and finding solutions together.

Ensure both you and your partner are on board with this change. After all, a relationship is about teamwork.

2) Keeping score

In my relationship, I noticed a pattern causing unnecessary tension. It was the act of keeping score.

Keeping score is when you constantly tally up what you’ve done versus what your partner has done. 

For example, “I cooked dinner four times this week, and you only did it twice.”

The problem? This can lead to resentment and a tit-for-tat mentality, which is not conducive to a happy relationship.

Once I recognized this behavior, I consciously let go of it. Instead of keeping tabs on who did what, we started to appreciate each other’s efforts more openly.

The result? The atmosphere changed dramatically. We felt happier and more harmonious.

 A relationship isn’t a competition. It’s mutual support and understanding. Resist the urge to keep score, and watch how your relationship blossoms!

3) Neglecting communication

Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship. It’s how we express our needs, wants, and emotions.

Yet, it’s something that many of us struggle with.

 When communication breaks down, misunderstandings happen, feelings get hurt, and resentment can build.

The solution? Make open and honest communication a priority. Whether it’s about your day, your feelings, or even those niggling irritations – talk it out.

Saying goodbye to poor communication can make a difference in your relationship. 

It opens up the door to understanding, empathy, and closeness. This is what you need in your happy relationship. 

4) Avoiding conflict

It may seem counterintuitive, but avoiding conflict is unhealthy for a relationship. 

Nobody enjoys arguments, but they’re often a sign of engagement and investment in the relationship.

Sweeping issues under the carpet or turning a blind eye to problems doesn’t make them disappear. They often fester and grow, leading to more significant issues.

Instead of avoiding conflict, aim to address issues as they arise. Communicate your feelings calmly and constructively, and listen to your partner’s perspective without interrupting.

 Say goodbye to conflict avoidance and embrace healthy discussions. 

This strengthens your bond and fosters a more profound understanding between you and your partner in the long run.

5) Comparing your relationship to others 

In the era of social media, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing your relationship to the seemingly perfect ones you see online. 

 It’s important to remember that what you’re seeing is a highlight reel, not the whole story.

Every relationship has its dynamics, challenges, and joys. Comparing yourself to others can lead to feelings of inadequacy and dissatisfaction.

Instead of looking at what others have, focus on what makes your relationship unique. 

Celebrate your bond and improve it in ways that matter to you and your partner.

Embrace your unique journey and cultivate a relationship that brings out the best in both of you.

6) Taking each other for granted

Falling into a routine is accessible in a long-term relationship. Thus, sometimes, you must remember to appreciate the person right before you.

We forget those little things they do for us – from making our favorite coffee in the morning to always being there to listen after a long day.

Taking each other for granted can slowly erode the bond you share. 

It gives birth to feelings of being undervalued and unappreciated.

 Let’s make a pact never to let that happen. Let’s express our gratitude more often, appreciate those little things, and never lose sight of our partner’s uniqueness.

Say goodbye to taking each other for granted and hello to a renewed appreciation for your partner. Trust me, it can make all the difference.

7) Bottling up emotions

There was a time when I was holding back my emotions, which was the best way to keep the peace in my relationship.

I used to swallow my feelings, convinced that expressing them would only lead to conflict.

But over time, I realized this was doing more harm than good. The bottled-up emotions eventually spill over, leading to more arguments and increased tension.

The truth is, it’s okay to have emotions and express them.

It’s okay to feel hurt, angry or upset. What’s important is how we communicate these feelings.

Learning to express my emotions respectfully and constructively was a game-changer for me.

It paved the way for better understanding and deeper connections.

 Learn to express your feelings constructively. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.

8) Trying to change your partner

In any relationship, wanting your partner to change certain habits or behaviors is natural.

However, trying to mold them into your idea of a perfect partner can often lead to frustration and disappointment.

We all have our quirks and flaws that make us who we are.

Appreciate your partner for who they are, flaws and all, is crucial to a happy and fulfilling relationship.

Of course, this doesn’t apply to harmful or toxic behaviors. But for the more minor things – maybe they’re not as tidy as you’d like, or they have a habit of leaving cupboard doors open – learn to accept them as part of who your partner is.

Goodbye to trying to change your partner.

Focus on understanding, accepting, and loving them for who they are.

After all, it’s these differences that often make a relationship enjoyable!

9) Forgetting to nurture your relationship

A relationship is like a garden. It needs consistent care and attention to flourish.

You can only plant the seeds and expect them to grow with water, sunshine, and a little love.

Nurturing your relationship means spending quality time together, expressing your love and appreciation regularly, and never stopping dating each other.

 It means working through problems together, supporting each other’s dreams and goals, and continually finding ways to keep the spark alive.

Make nurturing your relationship a priority.

Because at the end of the day, it’s the love, care, and effort you put into your relationship that genuinely makes it thrive.

The heart of the matter

A relationship is a delicate dance of love, understanding, and compromise. It’s not always easy, but it’s unquestionably worth it.

The behaviors we’ve discussed are not just random habits. They carry weight and directly impact the happiness and harmony in our relationships.

Letting go of these behaviors won’t happen overnight.

It’s a process – a journey of conscious choices and deliberate actions towards building a healthier, happier relationship.

 Each relationship has its unique rhythm. There’s no one-size-fits-all blueprint for happiness.

What works for one couple might not work for another. But the willingness to reflect, learn, and grow together is universal.

 Take a moment to reflect on your relationship.

How many of these behaviors resonate with you? How many are you willing to let go of for happiness?

After all, at the end of the day, our choices shape our happy relationships and our lives.