Parenting is a tricky business. It’s not just about providing for your child’s needs; it’s also about setting the right example. Because let’s face it, our kids are always watching, absorbing our behaviors and attitudes like sponges.

But here’s the thing, some habits we’ve picked up along the way might not be the best ones to pass on to our little ones. As a role model, it’s crucial to acknowledge these behaviors and say goodbye to them – for good.

In this piece, I will walk you through some behaviors that might be hindering your ability to be the influential role model you aspire to be for your child. Trust me, it’s easier than you think. Let’s dive in.

1) Criticizing others

One of the most common behaviors we all carry is criticizing others. We do it without thinking, sometimes as a way to vent or just engage in idle chit-chat. However, our children see and hear us.

The problem here is two-fold. Firstly, our kids learn that it’s okay to judge and criticize people, a habit that can lead to negativity and strained relationships. Secondly, they may begin to worry about being criticized themselves, leading to self-esteem issues.

As a role model, it’s essential to demonstrate respect and acceptance towards others, no matter their flaws or mistakes. So, let’s say goodbye to criticism and hello to a more positive environment for our children.

2) Being too protective

It sounds counterintuitive, right? After all, as parents, we’re wired to protect our children from harm. However, being overly protective can actually be detrimental to their growth and development.

Here’s why: when we constantly shield our kids from challenges or failures, we rob them of the chance to learn, grow, and build resilience. They need to experience life’s ups and downs to become well-rounded individuals.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying you should leave your child to fend for themselves entirely. It’s about finding a balance – stepping in when necessary while also allowing them the freedom to make mistakes and learn from them.

3) Over-relying on your partner

As parents, we all lean on our partners for support. And that’s normal. However, it’s important not to let this reliance turn into codependency. It’s something I’ve noticed over the years and discussed in my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship.

Codependency is when you rely so heavily on your partner that you begin to lose your sense of self. It’s not healthy for you, and it’s not the example we want to set for our children. We want them to learn the importance of individuality and self-reliance.

And if you want to find out more about this crucial concept, you might find it useful to check out my book. 

4) Neglecting self-care

This one hits close to home. As parents, we often put ourselves on the back burner. We get so involved in taking care of everyone else that we forget about our own needs. But remember the wise words of Eleanor Roosevelt, “You must do the things you think you cannot do.”

Self-care isn’t selfish. It’s necessary for our well-being, and it’s an important life lesson for our children. When they see us taking time for ourselves, they learn the value of self-care and self-respect.

5) Sweeping issues under the rug

I’ll be the first to admit, that solving conflicts can be tough. It’s often easier to sweep issues under the rug and pretend they don’t exist. But I’ve learned that this approach doesn’t solve anything; it only delays the inevitable.

When we avoid dealing with problems, our children notice. They learn to do the same, which can lead to poor problem-solving skills and unhealthy coping mechanisms.

As challenging as it may be, it’s essential to tackle conflicts head-on and show our kids how to handle disagreements in a respectful, constructive way.

6) Negative self-talk

We’ve all been there. You mess up, and before you know it, you’re down a spiral of negative self-talk. I’ve done it too. But as the great Maya Angelou once said, “You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.”

Negative self-talk not only brings us down but also sets an unhealthy example for our children. They learn to doubt themselves and their abilities, which can impact their confidence and self-esteem.

For more insights on positive parenting and relationships, feel free to follow me on Facebook. You’ll get my latest articles straight in your feed!

7) Trying to be perfect

Here’s a raw, honest truth: There’s no such thing as a perfect parent. We all make mistakes. We stumble, we falter, and sometimes we mess up badly. And that’s okay.

Striving for perfection sets unrealistic expectations for ourselves and our children. It can lead to stress, anxiety, and feelings of inadequacy.

Instead of aiming for perfection, let’s strive to be real. Let’s acknowledge our mistakes, learn from them, and show our kids that it’s okay to be human.

Final thoughts and reflections

Parenting is a delicate dance of love, learning, and letting go. The behaviors we exhibit today will shape our children’s lives tomorrow. Remember, we’re not just raising kids; we’re nurturing the next generation of thinkers, dreamers, and change-makers.

As we journey through this path of self-improvement for the sake of our children, let’s remember that change takes time. It’s about making a conscious decision every day to be better than we were yesterday.

In the spirit of personal growth, I’d love for you to watch this insightful video by Justin Brown. He explores the complexities of finding a life partner, reflecting on his personal experience after a failed date and the lessons he learned. From understanding the importance of shared values to the significance of growth and mutual support in a relationship, he shares his top insights to help you navigate the journey of finding a compatible partner.

In closing, remember that our children are always watching and learning from us. Let’s strive to be the best role models we can be by embracing positive behaviors and saying goodbye to those that don’t serve us or our children well.