As you get older, the importance of surrounding yourself with healthy, supportive people becomes crystal clear.

Toxic relationships can sap your energy, create unnecessary stress, and prevent you from living a peaceful life.

But avoiding toxic people isn’t just about recognizing their behaviors—it’s about reflecting on your own patterns, too. Certain habits and choices can unintentionally invite negativity into your life.

If you want to keep toxic people at arm’s length, it starts with changing the behaviors that make space for them.

Here are eight habits to let go of if you’re serious about protecting your peace.

1) Playing the victim

It’s a common behavior; when things go wrong, it’s easy to slip into the role of the victim. But this attitude often attracts toxic people who thrive on others’ perceived weakness.

Playing the victim means:

• Constantly blaming others for your own circumstances
• Refusing to take responsibility for your actions
• Expecting others to rescue you

This behavior can be incredibly draining for those around you and may attract individuals who feed off this negativity.

Toxic people are drawn to drama, and playing the victim is a surefire way to create unnecessary conflict.

The solution? Start taking control of your life. Accept responsibility for your actions and work towards finding solutions rather than dwelling on problems.

By saying goodbye to the victim mindset, you’re not only improving your own life but also making it less inviting for toxic individuals. Take charge of your life, and you’ll notice a shift in the type of people you attract.

2) The gossip habit

Once upon a time, I was quite the chatterbox. I had a habit of sharing office gossip without giving it a second thought. It felt like a harmless way to connect with others.

But over time, I noticed this behavior was attracting the wrong kind of people – those who thrived on rumors and negativity. Toxic people often enjoy gossip because it fuels their need for drama and attention.

So I decided to quit this behavior. Instead of engaging in gossip, I started focusing on positive conversations and discussing ideas.

The change was remarkable. The toxic individuals slowly drifted away, replaced by those who valued substantial and uplifting discussions.

Gossip might seem like an innocent pastime, but it’s a breeding ground for toxicity. Cutting it out from your behavior can significantly change the kind of people you attract.

3) The need to always be right

Insisting on being right all the time can create unnecessary tension and attract toxic people who thrive on conflict.

When you’re constantly trying to prove a point, it opens the door to arguments and power struggles that drain your energy.

Toxic individuals love to engage in debates where they can manipulate or dominate the conversation. By letting go of the need to always win, you take away their power and avoid being dragged into pointless drama.

Sometimes, it’s better to prioritize peace over being right. Letting things go doesn’t mean you’re weak—it means you value your emotional well-being more than a meaningless victory.

4) Letting your ego get in the way

A big ego can act like a magnet for toxic people. When you’re too focused on proving your worth, you might attract those who want to take advantage of your need for validation. Toxic individuals are experts at feeding egos to gain control or manipulate situations.

To add to that, here’s something interesting: In Buddhism, the ego is considered a major obstacle to enlightenment. It’s the part of us that clings to our self-image and drives us to defend it at all costs.

This can often result in a defensive, self-centered attitude that toxic people can manipulate for their own benefit.

In my book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego,” I delve into ancient Buddhist philosophies and practices that can help you manage your ego effectively.

By learning to let go of your ego, you’re not only adopting a healthier mindset for yourself but also creating an environment that is less attractive to toxic people.

Reducing ego-driven behaviors opens the door for genuine interactions and keeps at bay those who thrive on exploiting others’ insecurities.

5) Seeking approval

There was a time when I was constantly seeking approval from others. Whether it was my work, my appearance, or my life choices, I felt like I needed someone else’s validation to feel good about myself.

This constant need for approval was not only exhausting but also made me an easy target for toxic individuals.

Toxic people often prey on those who seek external validation as it gives them power. They can manipulate and control you by withholding or giving approval.

When I realized this, I decided to make a change. Instead of seeking approval from others, I started seeking it from within. This shift was empowering and helped me regain control over my life.

Remember, your worth is not defined by others’ opinions of you. Once you stop seeking external validation, you’ll find that toxic people have less power over you.

6) Avoiding confrontation

Confrontation is something most of us try to avoid. It’s uncomfortable, often awkward, and can lead to conflict.

But avoiding confrontation can actually attract toxic people into your life.

Why? Because toxic individuals thrive in environments where their behavior goes unchallenged.

They’re drawn to people who avoid confrontation because it allows them to continue their toxic behavior without any repercussions.

So, instead of avoiding confrontation, embrace it. Learn to express your feelings and stand up for yourself when necessary.

This doesn’t mean you have to be aggressive or rude, it’s about being assertive and respectful.

When you become comfortable with confrontation, you send a clear message to toxic individuals that their behavior won’t be tolerated. This can deter them from entering or staying in your life.

7) Perfectionism

Perfectionism seems like a positive trait on the surface. After all, who wouldn’t want to strive for excellence and precision?

But in reality, perfectionism can be a toxic trap, attracting people who exploit this trait for their own gain.

Toxic individuals often zero in on perfectionists because they know these individuals are hard on themselves and constantly seeking to improve.

They can manipulate this by criticising or belittling the perfectionist, knowing that they will take these comments to heart and work even harder to please.

Abandoning perfectionism doesn’t mean that you stop caring about doing a good job. Instead, it means understanding that it’s okay to make mistakes and that you don’t have to be perfect all the time.

Once you let go of perfectionism, you’ll notice a shift in the type of people you attract. You’ll draw in those who value your efforts and support your growth, rather than those who seek to exploit your insecurities.

8) Not setting boundaries

If there’s one thing you should remember from this article, it’s this: learning to set boundaries is the most effective way to avoid toxic people in your life.

Boundaries define what is acceptable behavior and what is not. They protect your mental and emotional health, and signal to others how they should treat you.

Toxic people often disregard or disrespect boundaries as a means of control. But if you’re firm and consistent with your boundaries, they will have a harder time manipulating or taking advantage of you.

Remember, it’s okay to say no. It’s okay to prioritize your own needs. And it’s more than okay to distance yourself from people who consistently cross your boundaries.

It’s a simple equation: the more you focus on your own growth and boundaries, the less room there is for toxicity in your life.

Protect your peace, and you’ll attract the kind of people who truly add value to it.