If you want to attract high-quality people without trying, say goodbye to these 9 habits

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | July 4, 2024, 12:20 pm

Attracting high-quality people isn’t about putting on a facade or trying too hard. In fact, it’s the opposite. It’s about letting go of certain habits that might be holding you back.

Here’s the thing; high-quality people are attracted to authenticity and positivity. They’re also repelled by certain behaviors and attitudes that seem desperate or unattractive.

In this article, I will reveal the nine habits you need to say goodbye to if you want to attract high-quality people effortlessly. It’s not about changing who you are, but about enhancing your natural appeal by making small but significant adjustments to your behavior.

So let’s dive in, shall we?

1) Complaining constantly

First things first, let’s talk about the habit of complaining.

Most of us are guilty of this to some extent. Be it about the weather, work, or even our own shortcomings – we complain. But here’s the thing: complaining doesn’t serve us well.

Actually, it pushes high-quality people away. They are usually those who value positivity and solutions over constant negativity and problems.

Don’t get me wrong, everyone has bad days and it’s totally okay to vent. But if your default mode is to complain, you might be driving potential high-quality people away without even realizing it.

2) Being a chronic procrastinator

Let’s face it, we all procrastinate at some point, myself included. But there’s a difference between occasionally putting things off and being a chronic procrastinator.

I remember a time when procrastination almost cost me a great friendship. I kept pushing back plans with a very dear friend, always promising to make it up. But in reality, I was just avoiding the commitment because of my laid-back attitude. It wasn’t until she confronted me about it that I realized the impact my procrastination was having on our relationship.

Here’s the thing: Top-notch people value their time and respect others who do the same. That’s why they are attracted to those who are reliable, punctual, and keep their word.

If you’re known for always saying “I’ll do it later”, it might be time to reconsider this habit. Start respecting your commitments and valuing your time as well as that of others.

3) Neglecting self-care

Self-care goes beyond just physical wellness; it includes mental and emotional health as well. It’s about treating yourself with kindness, love, and respect – the way you would treat someone you care deeply about.

The elite crowds are often hard-core investors in their own well-being. And they are attracted to those who do the same. If you’re always putting others before yourself or neglecting your needs, it’s time to break that habit.

You see, these people have a deep sense of self-awareness and alignment with their core values. When they encounter others who also invest in themselves, it signals a shared mindset and common ground.

Also, they swear by the importance of continuous growth and development. They recognize that surrounding themselves with like-minded individuals who prioritize self-improvement creates an environment conducive to mutual growth and success.

For this reason, they seek out peers who inspire and motivate them to maintain high standards in all aspects of life, including health, personal development, and success.

4) Being judgmental

We all have our own opinions and judgments—it’s just part of being human.

But when those judgments start creeping into every conversation, it can put a damper on things, especially when you’re trying to vibe with top-notch folks.

See, high-quality people?

They’re all about that open-minded vibe. They dig to hang out with folks who can roll with different viewpoints, even if they’re not on the same wavelength.

If you catch yourself slipping into a habit of constant criticism or judgment, maybe it’s time for a reality check. Give empathy and understanding a shot instead.

‘Cause here’s the deal: everybody’s got their own journey, their own struggles—stuff you might not even be clued in on.

And guess what?

Ditching the judgmental energy doesn’t just score you cool points with the high-quality crowd—it actually amps up your whole relationship game.

When people feel like you’re not sizing them up, but actually seeing where they’re coming from, they’re way more likely to kick back, open up, and connect with you on a deeper level.

5) Living in the past

We all have a past. It’s filled with both triumphs and failures, joys and sorrows. But it’s just that — the past.

Living in the past, be it dwelling on past mistakes or always reminiscing about ‘the good old days’, can prevent you from fully embracing the present and attracting high-quality people.

The crème de la crème?

They’re all about forward-thinking. They’re drawn to those who can learn from their past but don’t let it define their present or future.

So, if you find yourself stuck in a time warp, constantly hitting rewind on past events—yours or anyone else’s—it’s high time to kick that habit to the curb. Shift your focus to the present, and set your sights on what lies ahead. 

6) Ignoring your passions

Life can get busy. Between work, family, and other commitments, it’s easy to push your passions to the back burner.

But here’s something you should know: ignoring your passions can hinder your ability to attract high-quality people.

Why? Because high-quality people are often passionate individuals themselves. They are drawn to those who have a zest for life and pursue what they love.

When you follow your passions, you exude a certain energy that is incredibly attractive. It shows that you are not just existing, but truly living, and that’s contagious.

So go ahead, reignite that spark and let your passion shine. It’s one of the most beautiful gifts you can give to yourself and the world around you.

7) Avoiding difficult conversations

I’ll admit it—I used to steer clear of those tough conversations like they were trouble with a capital T. It seemed way easier to just sweep things under the rug than to dive headfirst into potential conflict.

But let me tell you, that avoidance tactic? Total backfire. Turns out, sidestepping those chats only brewed up a storm of misunderstanding and hard feelings.

But here’s the twist: Class-A folks are all about honesty and straight-up communication. They respect people who aren’t afraid to lay it all out there, even when it’s not the smoothest ride.

So, if you catch yourself doing the ol’ dodge-and-weave routine with those sticky convos, it’s time to switch gears. Sure, it might feel like stepping into a lion’s den at first, but trust me, it’s a total game-changer for building rock-solid connections.

Start by putting your thoughts and feels out there in a cool, assertive way. And remember, it’s not about winning some verbal showdown—it’s about finding common ground and keeping it real.

8) Not setting boundaries

Boundaries are like the invisible lines that define where we end and others begin. They’re like the guardrails of our mental and emotional space, keeping us safe and sound.

But let’s face it, setting and sticking to them can be a real struggle for many of us.

Standout personalities get it. They’re all about respecting boundaries and recognizing their importance.

And you know what? They’re drawn to folks who can hold their ground and say “no” when they need to.

So, here’s your reminder: it’s totally okay to put yourself first and lay down some boundaries. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, and anyone worth your time will totally get that.

By setting these healthy boundaries, you’re not just looking out for yourself; you’re also sending out a signal to the universe that you’re all about that self-respect.

And guess what? You’ll find that high-quality peeps who respect and value your autonomy start gravitating your way.  

9) Trying to please everyone

Let’s keep it real: trying to be everyone’s cup of tea is a recipe for disaster.

Fact is, you can’t please everyone, and that’s totally cool. The minute you start bending over backward to fit into everyone’s mold of perfection, you’re waving goodbye to your authenticity.

Listen up: High-caliber individuals are champions of authenticity. In fact, authenticity is the secret sauce to their unparalleled prowess. For this reason, they are drawn to those who are true to themselves, even if it means displeasing others at times. 

If you’re constantly trying to meet everyone’s expectations at the cost of your own happiness, it’s time to break free from this habit. Be yourself, unapologetically.

Final thoughts: Becoming your best self

When it comes to attracting high-quality people, the key lies not in becoming what others want to see, but in being the best version of yourself.

Remember, it’s not about changing who you are, but about embracing your authenticity and letting go of the habits that hold you back. And while these changes won’t happen overnight, every small step you take towards breaking these habits brings you closer to becoming a magnet for high-quality people.

As you embark on this journey of self-improvement and personal growth, remember to be kind to yourself. Change is a process that requires time, patience, and commitment. But rest assured, the rewards of attracting high-quality people and building meaningful relationships are worth every step.

So now it’s your turn. Reflect on these habits and identify which ones resonate with you. Then take that first step towards change. Because in the end, it’s not just about attracting high-quality people, but about becoming a high-quality person yourself.