I’ve always thought friendships were like shoes—you’ve got your comfortable pairs, your flashy heels, and then… the ones that give you blisters but somehow keep finding their way back onto your feet.

You know the friend I’m talking about. The one who always seems to need just a little more—more time, more attention, more everything.

Sometimes, being their friend feels less like a night out and more like a job that you never applied for.

But hey, we’re here, right?

So, let’s walk through this together—8 signs you might have one of those friends who’s taking up way more closet space in your life than they should.

1) Never-ending demands

We all have needs and wants, and it’s normal to seek help from our friends from time to time.

However, when it starts to feel like you’re constantly at their beck and call, that’s a good sign you’re dealing with a high-maintenance friend.

They always seem to have a request or favor to ask, no matter how big or small.

And somehow, these demands always seem to take priority over your own needs or plans.

It’s like they’ve got an endless list of requests and the moment you tick one off, another one appears. It becomes mentally and emotionally draining after a while.

If this sounds familiar, you might just have an incredibly high-maintenance friend in your life.

2) They turn every conversation into a monologue about themselves

Have you ever had those conversations where it feels like you’re just an audience to a one-man show?

I remember once when I had just gone through a pretty rough breakup. I needed someone to talk to, so I called up my friend.

I started sharing my feelings, but before I could even finish my story, she interrupted me.

Suddenly, the conversation took a sharp turn and it was all about her latest drama. My breakup was completely forgotten.

Every conversation seems to revolve around them, their problems, their achievements, their life.

You often find yourself listening more than you talk.

If this rings a bell, it’s another sign of a high-maintenance friend.

3) They require constant reassurance

High-maintenance friends often need a lot of validation and reassurance. It’s as if they feed off compliments and words of affirmation.

In fact, according to psychologists, people who constantly seek reassurance might be struggling with their self-esteem or self-worth.

You find yourself constantly having to reassure them, compliment them, or validate their feelings.

They need to be told that they’re loved, valued, and appreciated more often than not.

If you’re always the one giving out gold stars, it’s another indicator that you might have a high-maintenance friend.

4) They’re never wrong

Ever have a disagreement with a friend who just can’t accept they might be in the wrong?

High-maintenance friends often have a hard time admitting their mistakes. They always want to be right and will go to great lengths to prove their point.

Psychologists say that even when presented with clear evidence or logical arguments, they’ll twist the narrative or play the victim to avoid taking responsibility.

This stubborn refusal to admit they’re wrong can lead to unnecessary conflicts and damage relationships.

A friendship should have room for healthy disagreements and acceptance of each other’s mistakes.

If this isn’t the case, you might be dealing with a high-maintenance friend.

5) They don’t reciprocate

Friendship is a two-way street, it’s about giving and taking.

You’re there for them in their tough times, and they should be there for you in yours.

But with high-maintenance friends, it often feels like you’re the only one doing the giving.

You pour your heart and soul into supporting them, but when you need them, they seem to be nowhere in sight.

Their promises of “I’m here for you” often fall flat when you’re the one in need of a shoulder to lean on.

It can hurt to realize that the person you’ve been there for doesn’t seem to have the same level of commitment to you.

If this resonates with you, it’s another sign of a high-maintenance friend.

You deserve a friend who values and respects the balance of give and take in a friendship.

6) They’re overly critical

Nobody’s perfect, and we all appreciate a friend who can gently point out our mistakes and help us grow.

But there’s a difference between constructive criticism and constant nitpicking.

I recall a time when I wore a new dress that I was really excited about.

Instead of sharing my excitement, my friend immediately started pointing out all the things she didn’t like about it.

Her comments left me feeling self-conscious and deflated.

If your friend consistently criticizes you, your choices, or your appearance, under the guise of honesty or concern, it’s another sign of high-maintenance behavior.

Constructive criticism is one thing, but constant negativity is neither helpful nor healthy in a friendship.

7) They’re always the victim

Does your friend always seem to have a sob story? Is the world always against them?

High-maintenance friends often portray themselves as the victim in every situation.

They refuse to acknowledge their role in any problems they face and instead, blame everyone else. It’s never their fault.

If they didn’t get the job, it’s because the interviewer was biased.

If they had a falling out with another friend, that friend was obviously in the wrong.

This perpetual victim mentality can be exhausting and can prevent them from learning from their mistakes.

If your friend always plays the victim card, you might be dealing with a high-maintenance friend.

8) They don’t respect your boundaries

At the heart of any healthy relationship is respect for each other’s boundaries.

High-maintenance friends, however, often have a hard time understanding this concept.

Whether they’re calling you at all hours, demanding your time when you’re busy, or sharing your personal information without permission, these are clear violations of personal boundaries.

Respect for your time, privacy, and personal space is not negotiable.

If your friend repeatedly crosses these boundaries despite your attempts to communicate and set limits, it’s a definitive sign of a high-maintenance friend.

Final thoughts

Friendships are meant to be that little something extra in our lives, not another item on our to-do list.

I’ve learned that sometimes, the most loving thing we can do for ourselves—and our friends—is to set a boundary and see who respects it.

Because here’s the thing: real friends show up for the small stuff, the quiet moments, and yes, even the occasional meltdown.

Here’s one of my favorite quotes: “Friendship isn’t a big thing, it’s a million little things.”

And if those little things aren’t adding up in your favor, maybe it’s time to rethink the balance.

In the end, friendships should lift us, not leave us feeling drained.

So, take a look around—who’s lifting you up, and who’s just weighing you down?