If you recognize these 7 behaviors in yourself, you probably grew up with overly-frugal parents

Lucas Graham by Lucas Graham | October 11, 2024, 9:14 pm

Growing up, did you ever feel like your family was a bit more tight-fisted than others?

There’s a difference between being careful with money and being excessively penny-pinching.

The difference is all about perspective. Overly frugal parents often take saving money to an extreme, unknowingly instilling certain behaviors in their children.  What behaviors?

Well, that’s what we get into today. 

Spotting these in yourself can be enlightening, and maybe even a little amusing.

Let’s dive in.

1) You’re a master at resource optimization

Being thrifty often means making the most of what you have. Growing up, did you learn to squeeze every last bit out of toothpaste tubes or use soap down to the tiniest sliver?

This is all about resource optimization.

Resource optimization is a skill that’s second nature to people raised by overly-frugal parents. The fundamental idea is that you should maximize the value of everything you possess and minimize waste.

Think about it. It’s what drives people to repurpose leftovers into new meals or mend clothes instead of buying new ones.

If you find yourself going to great lengths to extend the life of everyday items and strict budgeting, you’re probably carrying over behaviors from an excessively frugal upbringing.

This is generally a good thing but keep in mind there’s a fine line between being resourceful and overdoing it. 

It’s okay to replace things when they’ve genuinely served their purpose.

2) Buying full price feels like a sin

We all love a good deal, don’t we?

But for some of us, the idea of buying something at full price feels downright wrong.

I remember a particular incident from my own childhood. I had my eye on this cool skateboard that all my friends were buzzing about. I begged my parents to buy it for me.

They agreed, but not before they had spent days scouring different stores to find the best deal. Buying it at full price was out of the question.

This behavior is so ingrained in me now that even as an adult, I find myself spending hours hunting for discounts and promo codes before making a purchase.

Can you relate to this?

If so, you’ve probably also grown up in a household where every penny was pinched, and full-price purchases were considered frivolous.

3) You instinctively hoard non-perishable items

Is your pantry packed with cans of soup from literally years ago? Do you have a mountain of paper towels and soap that could last you through the next apocalypse?

If your answer is yes, you’re not alone.

This habit of hoarding non-perishable items often stems from a “just in case” mindset. It might seem logical to stockpile during sales or for emergencies, but let’s dive into where this behavior comes from.

Historically, during the Great Depression, many families survived by stockpiling essentials. This survivalist mentality was passed down, and for many of us raised by overly frugal parents, it’s become second nature.

You might have grown up hearing, “Better safe than sorry,” and now your cupboards are stuffed with nonperishables that haven’t been touched in years.

While being prepared is wise, excessive hoarding can easily cross the line into clutter, and as noted by experts like those at WebMD, this can negatively impact our mental health by causing stress. 

Instead of saving you money, it might be creating stress and unnecessary chaos in your living space. Is it time to declutter?

4) You feel a deep satisfaction from DIY

Do you feel a sense of accomplishment when you fix a leaky faucet or assemble a piece of furniture yourself?

That’s probably because you were raised in a household where hiring professionals was considered an unnecessary luxury.

Growing up with overly-frugal parents often means learning to be self-sufficient. Whether it’s home repairs, car maintenance, or even crafting homemade gifts, doing it yourself is seen as a way to save money.

It’s great to have these skills but it’s also okay to hire professionals for tasks that are beyond your expertise. There’s no shame in asking for help when you need it.

5) Splurging on yourself feels uncomfortable

Growing up, birthday parties in my household were always homemade cakes and DIY decorations. The idea of spending money on a fancy bakery cake or hiring a party planner was unheard of.

As an adult, this has translated into an uncomfortable feeling whenever I consider spending money on myself.

Treating myself to a spa day or buying that high-end gadget I’ve been eyeing feels like an overindulgence, even when I can comfortably afford it.

Sound familiar?

It’s important to treat yourself every now and then. This is especially true when it involves self-care.

Self-care activities like a massage, a weekend getaway, or even simply buying a nice dinner might cost a few dollars, but as noted by Choosing Therapy, the benefits can include happier relationships, less stress, and increased self-esteem.

6) You’re always prepared with a packed lunch

If you can’t remember the last time you bought lunch at work or school, you were almost certainly raised by frugal parents.

Packing a lunch is often seen as a money-saving tactic, and those brought up in frugal households will usually have this practice ingrained in them from a young age.

It’s okay to occasionally enjoy a meal out. It’s about balance and allowing yourself the freedom to enjoy small conveniences when you can.

7) You equate spending with guilt

Perhaps, the most significant behavior indicating a frugal upbringing is feeling guilty whenever you spend money, even on necessities.

As noted by Dani Pascarella, the Founder and CEO of OneEleven, a financial wellness platform, “A big reason why people feel guilty about spending money is they fear that it could be going towards something better or more important.”

And I mean, that’s probably always true, right?

Anyway, this reasoning often stems from a childhood where every dollar was accounted for, and unnecessary spending was discouraged.

It’s perfectly okay to be mindful of your spending habits, but when guilt becomes associated with every purchase, it might be time to reassess your relationship with money.

Final thoughts: The link to your roots

The behaviors we carry into adulthood often have strong ties to the roots of our upbringing.

If you find yourself resonating with these frugality indicators, it’s likely a reflection of the financial habits you were exposed to in your formative years.

Growing up with overly-frugal parents can shape your relationship with money in profound ways.

It can teach you the value of thriftiness, resourcefulness, and financial prudence, but also inadvertently instill feelings of guilt associated with spending.

Recognizing these behaviors is the first step toward understanding your relationship with money and how it shapes your life choices.

It’s about finding a balance that allows you to enjoy the fruits of your labor without guilt while still maintaining a sensible approach to money management.

In essence, it’s about making peace with your past while crafting a future that aligns with your financial goals and personal happiness.