Humans are works in progress.

As much as we might fear change, it’s the only certainty in life.

Trouble is, sometimes we can’t help but stand in our own way.

If you’re struggling with growing pains, it may not be because you need to embrace the new.

Perhaps you must let go of the old to make progress.  

If you really want to grow as a person, say goodbye to these 7 attachments.

Only then you can finally be free.

1) Others’ expectations

Letting go of others’ expectations liberates you from living your life according to someone else’s standards.

Growing up, we are subjected to all sorts of expectations about how our lives will unfold.

Societal expectations, cultural expectations, religious expectations, our family’s expectations.

We don’t know better, so we internalize them.

We strive to become something we might not want to become to meet these expectations we didn’t even set for ourselves.

If you’re lucky, however, you eventually experience a moment of underlying clarity and ask yourself: is this what I want to do with my life?

Even if the answer is no, the pressure of conforming to what others want doesn’t dissipate.

It may still weigh you down as you attempt to make life decisions better aligned with your desires. You feel guilty for choosing an alternate path.

But becoming the architect of your destiny is the only way to reach your full potential.

And to do that, you must release the guilt and trust your gut, allowing yourself the freedom to discover and explore your passions.

Doesn’t that sound like fun?

2) Need for approval

I’m currently having the kind of day when I question my career path.

These days happen whenever I get negative feedback or no feedback at all.

See, I love writing, but I occasionally struggle with the blank page.

I lose sight of why I do it, and I get too wrapped up in what other people have to say about my wordy concoctions.

The uneasy feeling extends to everything I write, from this article to my Instagram stories to emails to nonsense I scribble on post-its, hoping it will morph into an idea if I stick it to the wall and never look at it again.

On days like this one, I feel like no one else cares about the words I commit to (digital) paper, so why should I keep bothering with them?

Wouldn’t I be better off doing literally anything else?

To get myself out of the funk, I try to write something that will appeal to as many people as possible.

This way, I can feed on external validation and believe that my words matter once more.

The problem is that whenever I attempt to write something like that, it comes across as a betrayal of who I am.

That’s when I remember why I chose this career in the first place. Because I find writing to be cathartic, and healing, and transformative.

It’s what helps me grow. And me being happy with the words I put out there is the only metric that matters.

Chasing after other people’s approval stifles your growth.

It makes you compromise your authenticity.

When you learn to let go of your need for approval, you discover new avenues of self-expression.

You find your voice.

Once that happens, there’s no turning back.

3) Past mistakes

Dwelling on past mistakes keeps you stuck in yesteryear.

Instead of reveling in the present and planning for the future, you remain fixated on what has already gone, which hinders your ability to evolve.

The worst part is that you can’t change any of it.

You know this, yet you keep obsessing over what you could have done differently.

Can you imagine what might happen if you put all that brain power to better use?

Acknowledge your past mistakes.

Learn from them.

Make amends if possible.

Then, release the guilt and move on.

Your self-esteem will skyrocket.

4) Relationships that have run their course

Not all people are meant to stay in our lives forever.

A couple of years ago, I realized that one of my friendships had run its course. We steadily grew apart and didn’t have much in common anymore.

Moreover, we had developed conflicting opinions on a lot of stuff, so every time we hung out we ended up fighting.

Even so, I was reluctant to leave the friendship behind because I cared for him deeply and we had known each other for years and years.

The more I clung to our dwindling connection, the more my disappointment grew.

At one point, we both stopped reaching out. I miss him from time to time, but I admit that the friendship was no longer serving us.

If a relationship becomes unfulfilling, it inevitably leads to feelings of resentment, frustration, or sadness.

By letting it go, you prioritize your emotional well-being and create space for healthier connections in your life.

You don’t have an endless amount of free time.

Make sure you spend it with people who have a positive influence.

5) Grudges

Another essential thing you should leave behind to become a better version of yourself?

Grudges.

Holding onto grudges ties you to negative emotions.

Anger. Bitterness. Stress.

Letting go of grudges, meanwhile, frees you from the burden of carrying around these bad feelings.

The world isn’t all sunshine and rainbows.

People can betray you or wrong you in a million little ways.

But just because someone ruined your day or your year doesn’t mean you should give them the power to ruin your entire life.

Trust in karma and focus your energy on building a better life for yourself.

Yearning for revenge can become a part-time job.

Not a very productive use of brain cells, in my humble opinion.   

6) Negative self-talk

If you really want to grow as a person, say goodbye to that mean little voice in your head that says you’re not good enough.

That you’re untalented or unattractive. That tries to convince you that you’ll never get what you want, so there’s no use in trying.

That little voice is lying.

It wreaks your confidence and keeps you from pursuing your dreams.

It convinces you to procrastinate, avoid challenges, and settle for less than you deserve.

When you choose to bid farewell to your tough inner critic, you can begin to reframe your negative thoughts.

You’re free to cultivate a mindset of self-empowerment and self-acceptance.

It will greatly benefit you in the long run.

7) Your comfort zone

It’s natural to be attached to your comfort zone.

That’s where you’re safe and cozy. It’s where you know what to expect, so there’s little chance of life taking you by surprise.

Unfortunately, though, clinging to your comfort zone equals clinging to stagnation.

You might feel snug as a bug in a rug, but you’re facing zero challenges.

By confining yourself to this limited space, you prevent yourself from spreading your wings.  

That’s why your best course of action is to venture outside and face the music.

You can still revisit that warm cocoon from time to time.

Final thoughts

Holding on to the attachments above hinders your ability to flourish.

Once you leave them behind, it will feel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

You’ll no longer be tied down by limiting beliefs or external pressure.

All that’s left is to look inward and figure out where you want to go from there.

When the path forward is wide open, forging ahead suddenly doesn’t seem that hard.