We all know that one person, right?

The one who radiates charm and friendliness, yet something feels… off. It’s like a puzzle you can’t quite solve, but deep down, you sense manipulation at play.

Well, brace yourself—you might be dealing with a master manipulator.

But here’s the kicker: you’re not alone. We’ve all crossed paths with these smooth operators at some point.

But fear not! There are clues, red flags waving in the wind, that reveal their true colors.

Today, let’s crack the code and uncover 7 unmistakable signs of a fake and manipulative persona.

1) They’re always playing the victim

I remember a former colleague of mine. Let’s call her Susan.

Susan always had a sob story to share. Every single day, there was a new crisis that she was the innocent victim of. It took me some time to realize that this was her way of manipulating those around her.

By constantly playing the victim, she was able to gain sympathy, avoid responsibility and keep everyone around her on their toes.

Watch out for manipulative tactics! They’re masters at flipping the script, painting themselves as victims when they’re the ones pulling the strings. Notice someone constantly caught in drama, never taking responsibility? Beware!

2) They’re overly charming

When I first met my neighbor, let’s call him John, he was incredibly charming. He always had a compliment ready, and he seemed to have an answer for everything. But as time went on, I realized that his charm was a facade.

He used it to win people over and then manipulate them to his advantage.

Charm is great, but beware the charm overload! If someone’s always singing your praises, never offering a dissenting word, it’s time to question their sincerity. They might be using charm as a sneaky tool to manipulate you into dancing to their tune.

3) They never keep their promises

Promises are a common tool used by manipulative individuals. They use them to keep you hooked, to make you feel like there’s a reward coming your way.

Yet, fake and manipulative individuals continue to use this tactic, knowing that the hope of fulfillment often keeps people hanging on. If someone in your life is always promising big things but never follows through, it’s not a promising sign.

4) They’re quick to blame others

It’s tough when someone you care about won’t take responsibility for their actions. When their mistakes are always someone else’s fault. It’s draining and it can leave you feeling like the bad guy even when you’re not.

This blame game is a classic sign of a manipulative individual. They shift the blame to avoid any negative consequences and to keep you off balance.

When you’re made to feel guilty for things that aren’t your fault, remember, it’s not about you. It’s about them and their inability to take responsibility.

5) They gaslight you

Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic where a person makes you question your reality, your memory, even your sanity. It happened to me once.

A friend of mine would constantly tell me that events didn’t happen the way I remembered them. She would twist facts and deny things she’d said or done. It was so subtle that I started doubting my own memory. 

If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, where someone is making you question your own memory or perceptions, take a step back. You might be dealing with a master manipulator.  

6) They always want something from you

A common trait amongst manipulative individuals is that they always seem to need something from you. Whether it’s your time, your resources, or simply your emotional support, they’re never just around for the sake of friendship or companionship.

It’s always transactional.

In my college years, I had a friend who would only reach out when he needed something. Help with his assignments, a ride to someplace, or even someone to vent to when he was having a rough day. But when I needed someone? He was always too busy.

Spot someone thriving amidst chaos or delighting in stirring conflict? Stay on your toes. They could be orchestrating mayhem to wield power and maintain control.

7) They thrive on chaos

Manipulative individuals often thrive on chaos. They create situations where people are unsure, confused, or in conflict. This puts them in a position of power because they can then step in as the “problem solver” or the “peace maker.”

In my previous job, we had a manager who would intentionally pit team members against each other, creating a hostile work environment. But when everything would start falling apart, he’d swoop in with a solution, playing the hero. It was his way of keeping us on our toes and maintaining control.

If you notice someone in your life who seems to thrive when things are in disarray or who seems to enjoy creating conflict, be cautious. They might be creating chaos to manipulate others and keep control.

Your gut is your ultimate relationship compass

In conclusion, dealing with a manipulative individual can be draining and damaging. But by being aware of these signs, you can protect yourself and maintain your mental and emotional health.  

Trust your gut and establish unwavering boundaries. Surround yourself with those who genuinely uplift and honor you. And if you confront manipulation, stand strong, affirm your value, and stay true to yourself.