Relationships should be about liberation, not limitation.

Feeling suffocated in a relationship is a sign that something’s not right. It’s an indication that you’re being boxed in, rather than being allowed to grow.

The problem often lies not in the relationship itself, but in certain behaviors that have become a part of it.

So if your relationship feels more like a prison than a partnership, it’s time to say goodbye to these nine harmful behaviors. And remember, it’s not about blaming your partner or yourself – it’s about fostering a healthier, happier relationship.

In this article, we’ll explore these behaviors and offer advice on how to eliminate them from your love life.

1) Freedom over control

Healthy relationships are about mutual growth and independence, not control and dominance.

If you’re feeling suffocated, it’s likely because someone is trying to control every aspect of your life. This could be your partner dictating what you should wear, who you should hang out with, or even what you should think.

Control is a power play, and it’s a sign of insecurity. It’s the opposite of trust, which is the foundation of any strong relationship.

So if you’re in a relationship where control is more prevalent than freedom, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior. Recognize it for what it is – a barrier to your personal growth and happiness.

Remember, it’s not about assigning blame but about recognizing harmful patterns and making positive changes. Standing up for your freedom doesn’t mean you’re rejecting your partner, but rather rejecting a behavior that’s harming the relationship.

2) Goodbye to constant criticism

In any relationship, constructive criticism can be helpful. However, there’s a big difference between constructive criticism and constant, relentless criticism that chips away at your self-esteem.

I remember in one of my past relationships, my partner would critique everything I did – from the way I ate my food to the clothes I wore. It was as if I couldn’t do anything right in their eyes. This constant criticism left me feeling small and inadequate, like I was walking on eggshells.

Eventually, I realized that this wasn’t about me or my shortcomings. It was about them and their insecurities projecting onto me.

Saying goodbye to this behavior was liberating. I understood that it’s important to be with someone who encourages and uplifts you rather than tearing you down.

If you’re experiencing something similar, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior. Everyone has the right to be treated with respect and kindness in a relationship.

3) Stop the blame game

Blaming each other for every little thing that goes wrong is neither healthy nor productive. It creates a hostile environment and can lead to resentment over time.

Research in the field of psychology has shown that couples who engage in mutual blame are more likely to experience relationship dissatisfaction and breakup.

So if you find that your relationship is turning into a battlefield of accusations, it’s time to call a cease-fire.

Instead of pointing fingers, try to understand each other’s perspectives. Practice empathy and work together to find solutions. Remember, it’s not about who’s right or wrong but rather about resolving issues and growing together.

4) End the silent treatment

Silence might be golden in some situations, but when it comes to relationships, it can be suffocating. The silent treatment is a passive-aggressive form of emotional manipulation that aims to punish the other person without having to articulate why.

This kind of behavior can leave you feeling confused and uncertain, adding unnecessary stress to the relationship.

If you find yourself or your partner resorting to silence as a weapon, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior. Open communication is key in any relationship. Discussing what’s bothering you instead of resorting to silence can help to resolve issues and build a stronger bond.

5) Ditch the jealousy

Jealousy, in small amounts, can be a sign of affection. But when it becomes a recurring theme, it can suffocate a relationship.

Excessive jealousy is often driven by insecurity and a lack of trust. It can lead to unnecessary arguments and create an atmosphere of doubt and suspicion.

If you or your partner are continually battling feelings of jealousy, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior. Instead, work towards building trust and security in your relationship. Remember, it’s about cherishing each other, not owning each other.

6) Let go of conditional love

Love isn’t supposed to come with a list of conditions. It’s not a business contract where you’re expected to fulfill certain obligations to be worthy of love.

Real love is unconditional. It’s about accepting each other wholeheartedly, flaws and all.

If you’re in a relationship where love feels like a reward for meeting certain criteria, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior. Love should make you feel cherished and appreciated for who you are, not what you do or how well you meet someone’s expectations.

Releasing the chains of conditional love can be a liberating and heart-opening experience. It can help you foster a more authentic, loving, and fulfilling relationship.

7) No room for disrespect

Respect is one of the cornerstones of a healthy relationship. Without it, a relationship can quickly turn toxic.

I faced this in one of my relationships. I was made to feel like my opinions didn’t matter, and my needs were secondary. It was belittling and left me feeling less than.

It took me a while to realize that this was not okay, and I deserved better. Saying goodbye to the disrespect in that relationship was one of the most empowering things I’ve done.

If you’re in a relationship where disrespect is a common occurrence, it’s time to say goodbye to that behavior. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and respect, and it’s okay to demand that for yourself.

8) Eliminate emotional blackmail

Emotional blackmail is a manipulative tactic used to control and influence others by exploiting their fears, vulnerabilities, and insecurities.

It can take many forms, such as guilt-tripping, threatening, or even playing the victim. This behavior can be extremely damaging and can suffocate the joy and trust in a relationship.

If you’re experiencing emotional blackmail in your relationship, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior. You should never feel like your emotions are being used against you. Healthy relationships are about mutual respect, understanding, and emotional safety.

9) Say no to loss of individuality

In any relationship, it’s healthy to have shared interests and activities. But it’s equally important to retain your individuality – the unique qualities and passions that make you who you are.

When you start losing your sense of self in a relationship, it can feel suffocating. You might feel like you’re living for your partner’s desires and expectations, forgetting your own.

If you’re feeling this way, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior. It’s crucial to maintain your identity and continue doing things that make you happy. After all, it’s your individuality that makes you unique and attractive. Don’t let anyone, not even your partner, take that away from you.

Final thoughts: Establishing boundaries

The essence of a healthy relationship lies in the balance between togetherness and individuality.

This balance is often maintained through boundaries – invisible lines that define your personal comfort zone. They can be physical, emotional, or mental, but their purpose is the same: to protect your wellbeing.

Dr. Henry Cloud, a renowned clinical psychologist and bestselling author, once said, “Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me.”

If you’re feeling suffocated in a relationship, it might be a sign that your boundaries have been crossed or ignored. Saying goodbye to behaviors that disrespect these boundaries isn’t about pushing your partner away; it’s about establishing a healthier dynamic in your relationship.

Reflect on these behaviors and consider how they might be affecting your relationship. Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your wellbeing and emotional health. Relationships should be a source of love and support, not stress and suffocation.