Compromise is about finding a healthy balance, a give-and-take that benefits both of you. Sacrifice, however, is when you’re constantly giving and not getting much in return.

The trouble is it’s not always easy to tell when you’ve crossed the line from compromise to sacrifice. Especially when you’re in love and willing to do just about anything for your partner.

Here are 9 things that might indicate you’re sacrificing too much in your relationship, and perhaps it’s time to reconsider.

1) Constantly putting their needs before yours

In a healthy relationship, both partners’ needs are equally important. But when you start to neglect your own needs to keep your partner happy, it’s a sign that the balance has tipped.

It might seem like a small sacrifice in the moment, but over time, neglecting your own needs can lead to resentment and dissatisfaction.

Ask yourself: Are you always the one making sacrifices? If so, it might be time to reassess.

2) Feeling like you’re losing your identity

I remember being in a relationship where I started to feel like I was losing my own identity. I was so wrapped up in doing everything for my partner, from choosing their favorite restaurants to hanging out with their friends more than mine, that I slowly started to forget who I was outside of the relationship.

I realized I was compromising too much when I looked in the mirror one day and didn’t recognize the person staring back at me. The things that once brought me joy and defined who I was, were replaced by my partner’s preferences.

This is a major red flag. In a balanced relationship, you should never feel like you’re losing yourself or your identity. Your individuality should be celebrated and respected, not suppressed or ignored.

3) You’re always the one apologizing

In any relationship, disagreements are bound to happen. It’s how we handle these disagreements that can determine the health of our relationship.

Did you know that couples who share responsibility in resolving conflicts tend to have healthier and more satisfying relationships?

Yet, if you find yourself always being the one to apologize, even when you’re not at fault, this could be a sign you’re compromising too much.

It’s important to remember that a successful relationship relies on both parties taking accountability for their actions and working towards resolution, not just one person shouldering all the blame.

4) You’re always the one making plans

Both partners should contribute to making plans and decisions. It’s not just about where to go for dinner or what movie to watch, but also about bigger things like where to spend holidays or major life decisions.

If you’re always the one putting in the effort to make plans and your partner is just going along for the ride, it’s a sign. It could indicate a lack of interest or commitment from your partner, and that’s not something you should overlook.

Remember, a relationship is a two-way street. Both partners should be equally invested in planning your shared life.

5) You’re tolerating behaviors that make you uncomfortable

Whether it’s constant lateness, a disregard for your feelings, or even something more serious like lying or cheating, no one should have to put up with behavior that makes them feel uneasy or disrespected.

When you’re compromising too much, you might find yourself making excuses for your partner’s behavior or brushing it under the rug just to keep the peace.

This is not a sustainable situation. Your feelings matter, and if something is making you uncomfortable, it needs to be addressed. Ignoring these issues won’t make them go away, and can even lead to bigger problems down the line.

6) Your dreams and ambitions take a backseat

We all have dreams and ambitions. They’re a part of who we are. They drive us, inspire us, and give us hope for the future.

There’s nothing wrong with supporting your partner’s goals – in fact, it’s a wonderful thing to do. But it should never come at the expense of your own dreams.

If you find that you’re constantly putting aside your own aspirations to help your partner achieve theirs, or if your partner doesn’t show the same support and encouragement for your dreams, it’s a sign that something isn’t right.

A loving partner will want to see you succeed just as much as they want to succeed themselves. Don’t let your dreams fall by the wayside in the name of compromise.

7) You’re constantly walking on eggshells

I recall a time when I found myself constantly walking on eggshells, worried that the slightest misstep would upset my partner. I was always cautious, always second-guessing my actions, always anxious.

This constant state of worry and fear is not a sign of a healthy relationship. You should feel safe and secure with your partner, not constantly stressed about upsetting them.

Relationships should bring joy and a sense of safety, not a constant state of tension.

8) Your friends and family have expressed concern

Your friends and family care about you and want the best for you. So, if they’re expressing concern about your relationship, it’s worth taking a moment to listen.

Often, those on the outside looking in can see things more clearly than we can when we’re in the thick of it. If they’re noticing that you’re unhappy or that you’re changing in ways that concern them, don’t dismiss their observations lightly.

While it’s ultimately your decision, do take the time to consider their perspectives. It’s possible that they’re noticing signs of excessive compromise that you’ve become too close to see.

9) There’s more pain than joy in the relationship

At the heart of it all, relationships should bring more joy than pain. They should uplift you, support you, and make you feel loved and appreciated.

If you find that your relationship is causing you more pain than joy, or if the thought of your relationship brings up more stress than happiness, it’s a strong sign that something isn’t right.

You deserve a relationship that enriches your life and makes you feel good about yourself. If that’s not what you’re experiencing, it might be time to consider moving on.

Ultimately, it’s about self-love and respect

At the core of this journey, it’s essential to remember that your feelings, needs, and happiness are just as important as your partner’s.

Renowned psychotherapist and relationship expert, Esther Perel, often says, “The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives”. This statement holds immense truth. If a relationship is causing you more pain than joy, it might be time to reevaluate its role in your life.

Self-love and respect are critical.

At the end of the day, the person you should be most accountable to is yourself. Your happiness and peace should never be at the mercy of another person’s actions or feelings.

Acknowledging that you too deserve love, respect, and happiness. And sometimes, moving on from a relationship that doesn’t serve you is the bravest act of self-love you can perform.