Overthinking and anxiety can often go hand in hand, trapping you in a cycle that feels impossible to break.

In my journey, I’ve discovered that particular behaviors tend to fuel this cycle.

But the good news? We can say goodbye to them.

In this piece, I’ve identified 9 behaviors that you need to ditch if you’re constantly overthinking and feeling anxious. These are behaviors I’ve personally grappled with and, by recognizing and addressing them, I’ve found my path towards a calmer mind.

1) Perfectionism

We all aspire to do our best, but when this aspiration turns into an obsession, it becomes a problem.

Perfectionism is one of those behaviors that can fuel overthinking and anxiety. The constant quest for the ‘perfect’ outcome, the ‘perfect’ choice, the ‘perfect’ response can send our minds into a constant whirl of overthinking.

Let’s face it. Not everything will go as planned and that’s okay. Accepting the fact that we’re all human and we all make mistakes can be a liberating step towards breaking the cycle of overthinking and anxiety.

2) Procrastination

I’ll be the first to admit, I’ve been a chronic procrastinator.

There’s always that voice in the back of my head saying, “You can do it later.” But as most of us know, ‘later’ often turns into ‘never’.

Procrastination is a sneaky behavior that feeds into overthinking and anxiety. The more you delay tasks, the more they pile up, leading to stress and a constant sense of unease.

One day, I decided to break this cycle. I started with small tasks, like doing the dishes immediately after dinner or replying to emails as soon as they came in.

The change was remarkable. My mind was less cluttered and I felt lighter. By not procrastinating, I was cutting down on the mental load of pending tasks.

3) Nighttime screen time

Our modern lives are intertwined with technology. We’re constantly scrolling through social media, checking emails, or binge-watching our favorite shows, often right up until bedtime.

Here’s the downside: exposure to screens before sleep can actually alter your body’s production of melatonin, the hormone that regulates sleep. This can lead to disrupted sleep patterns, which in turn can exacerbate feelings of anxiety and overthinking.

Bottom line? Cutting down on screen time before bed can be a significant step towards reducing overthinking and anxiety. Instead, try reading a book or practicing some gentle yoga to help your mind and body wind down for restful sleep.

4) Constantly seeking validation

We all like to be appreciated. It’s human nature. But when we start relying on others for validation, it can take a toll on our mental health.

Constantly seeking approval can keep the mind in a perpetual state of anxiety. You may find yourself overthinking every decision, wondering what others will think or say.

The key is to start trusting yourself. Your decisions are just as valid as anyone else’s. You don’t need someone else’s approval to affirm your worth.

Start by making small decisions independently, and gradually work your way up. With time, you’ll find your confidence growing and your anxiety fading.

5) Neglecting self-care

In the hustle and bustle of life, it’s easy to put ourselves last. Work, family, friends – all these often take priority while we push our own needs to the back burner.

But neglecting self-care is a surefire way to invite overthinking and anxiety into your life. When you don’t take time for yourself, stress builds up, leaving you feeling overwhelmed and anxious.

Whether it’s a hot bath, a brisk walk in the park, or simply spending a few quiet moments with a cup of tea, find what rejuvenates you and make it a part of your routine. 

6) Holding on to past mistakes

We’ve all made mistakes. Big or small, they’re a part of our journey. They shape us, teach us, and help us grow.

But when we hold on to these past mistakes, constantly replaying them in our minds, they become a prison. Overthinking sets in as we dissect every detail of what went wrong and how we could have done better.

It’s important to remember that mistakes are not life sentences. They’re lessons. And once the lesson is learned, it’s time to let go.

7) Avoiding difficult conversations

I used to be someone who would dodge difficult conversations. The mere thought of confrontation would send my anxiety levels through the roof.

But avoiding these discussions only caused the problems to fester, leading to more stress and overthinking. It was like a cloud hanging over my head, casting a shadow on everything else.

One day, I decided to face this fear head on. I realized that having these conversations wasn’t about confrontation, it was about resolution. It was about clearing the air, addressing the issue, and finding a way forward.

It wasn’t easy, but it was worth it. The relief I felt after having these conversations was immense.

8) Suppressing emotions

In our society, we’re often taught to suppress our emotions. Showing feelings is sometimes seen as a sign of weakness.

But here’s the truth: emotions are a part of being human. Suppressing them can lead to an internal buildup of stress, which can trigger overthinking and anxiety.

It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or frustrated. What matters is how you handle these emotions.

My advice? Find a safe outlet for your feelings. It could be a trusted friend, a family member, or a mental health professional. Alternatively, writing in a journal can also be a great way to express your emotions freely.

9) Living in the future

The future is uncertain, and that can be a breeding ground for anxiety and overthinking. We can get so caught up in planning, anticipating, and worrying about what’s to come that we forget to live in the present.

While it’s prudent to prepare for the future, it’s equally important to live in the now. The present moment is all we truly have. It’s where life is happening.

So, take a deep breath, look around you, and live this moment to the fullest. By staying present, you’re giving your mind a break from the endless cycle of ‘what ifs’ and worries about the future.

Final thoughts: The power of change is in your hands

Ah, the human mind—an enigmatic marvel that dances between boundless creativity and the tangled webs of overthinking and anxiety.

But remember, we are not helpless victims of our thoughts. We have the power to change, to break free from the shackles of overthinking and anxiety.

Each of the behaviors we’ve discussed is something we can choose to let go of. It may not happen overnight. It may take time, patience, and persistence. But it’s a journey worth embarking on.