Spotting a liar isn’t always as easy as you might think.

Often, it comes down to being aware of certain tell-tale signs. People who are lying tend to use specific phrases to make their falsehoods seem more believable.

Just as there are key phrases that can be used to influence others without manipulation, there are also phrases that can hint at deception.

Here nine phrases that could signal someone is trying to pull the wool over your eyes.

And trust me, once you know what they are, you’ll start hearing them everywhere.

Let’s get started. 

1) “Trust me…”

Navigating the murky waters of truth and lies can be a bit like detective work. But sometimes, those who are lying give themselves away with their choice of words.

Deception often hides behind phrases that are intended to build trust. One of the most common offenders is the phrase, “Trust me.”

Ironically, when someone needs to assure you of their trustworthiness, it could be a sign that they’re trying to divert your attention from their dishonesty. It’s a classic misdirection technique.

It’s essential to remember that trust should be earned through actions, not words. If someone frequently uses this phrase, they might be attempting to build a false sense of security.

Don’t take it at face value. Instead, look at the bigger picture and consider their actions and other verbal cues before deciding whether to trust them or not.

When it comes to distinguishing truth from lies, your intuition is your best friend. If something feels off, it probably is.

2) “I swear…”

Now, this one is a phrase I’ve had personal experience with. I recall a distinct memory from my college days.

A friend of mine, let’s call him Rob, had a knack for spinning tales. He was always the one with the most extravagant stories. One day, he borrowed my favorite book and promised to return it the next week.

Weeks turned into months, and there was no sign of my book. When I confronted him about it, his immediate response was, “I swear I put it in your dorm room!”

Rob used the phrase “I swear” to reinforce his claim, but something didn’t feel right. My gut was telling me he was lying. And as it turned out, my instinct was spot on.

A few days later, I found that same book at a local bookstore with a ‘used’ tag on it. Apparently, Rob had been a little strapped for cash and decided to sell my book instead of returning it.

This taught me a valuable lesson: when someone uses phrases like “I swear,” they might be trying to cover up a lie. It’s an attempt to make their words seem more credible without providing any substantial proof.

Always trust your gut and look for actions that support the words. After all, actions speak louder than words.

3) “To be honest…”

Among the phrases used to mask deception, “to be honest” ranks high. This phrase is a psychological trick often used to create a perception of sincerity and openness.

Here’s the catch: research has shown that honesty is our default setting. Most people tell the truth most of the time. So, when someone feels the need to preface their statement with “to be honest,” it could signal they’re straying from that default.

This phrase is effectively trying to artificially heighten the value of the following statement. It’s as if they’re saying, “Listen up, what I’m about to say is especially truthful!” But why would they need to do that unless there’s a deviation from their normal truthfulness?

While this isn’t a foolproof lie detector (some people use this phrase out of habit), it’s certainly a red flag that should make you more alert to the possibility of deception.

4) “I don’t remember…”

Have you ever noticed someone conveniently forgetting details when you’re seeking the truth? The phrase “I don’t remember” is frequently used as a shield against lying outright.

It’s a way for individuals to sidestep questions they’d rather not answer truthfully. By claiming forgetfulness, they avoid the risk of their lie being uncovered later.

While it’s true that everyone forgets things from time to time, consistent selective memory can be a sign of deceit. If the person repeatedly fails to recall details related to a specific event or situation, it’s worth keeping your guard up.

Like all these phrases, however, it’s crucial to consider the context and the person.

Some people genuinely have poorer memories than others. But if “I don’t remember” is paired with other suspicious signs, it might be time to question their honesty.

5) “That’s about it…”

When someone is not telling the truth, they often want to close the conversation quickly. They’re aiming to avoid further questions that could expose their deception.

That’s where phrases like “That’s about it” come into play. It’s a subtle way of saying, “I’m done talking about this,” or “I don’t want to provide any more information.”

If someone frequently uses this phrase to wrap up their stories or explanations, especially when you feel there should be more details, it might be a sign they’re hiding something.

Keep an eye out for such conversation enders. They could be a warning signal that not all is as it seems.

Truth usually welcomes questions, while lies often avoid them.

6) “I never…”

This phrase hits close to home for many of us. “I never” is a definitive statement often used to deny accusations or involvement in something.

In my years of observing human behavior, I’ve noticed that people telling the truth tend to use softer language. They might say, “I don’t think I did” or “I can’t recall doing that”. On the flip side, those trying to hide something frequently resort to rigid language like “I never”.

It’s a defensive strategy, meant to shut down further questions. But it’s the absolute certainty of this phrase that often raises eyebrows. After all, life is rarely absolute.

So while it’s essential to avoid jumping to conclusions based solely on someone’s choice of words, hearing “I never” should encourage you to delve a little deeper and keep your senses alert for other signs of deceit.

7) “I wouldn’t do that…”

Once, during a rough patch in an old relationship, I noticed my partner started using the phrase, “I wouldn’t do that.” It was usually in response to accusations or suspicions.

It’s a phrase that’s meant to express innocence, but it can sometimes hint at the opposite. It’s like they’re trying to convince you—and maybe themselves—that they’re incapable of such behavior.

In my case, I eventually discovered my partner had been unfaithful. That phrase had been a smoke screen, an attempt to deflect my suspicions.

So, if someone frequently assures you they “wouldn’t do that,” especially when you haven’t accused them of anything, it might be a sign there’s more to the story. As ever, it’s crucial to consider the broader context and not jump to conclusions based solely on a single phrase.

8) “It’s just that…”

The phrase “It’s just that…” is often a prelude to an excuse or justification. When someone uses this phrase, they may be trying to divert your attention from the truth by explaining away their actions or behavior.

This phrase is a signal that the person might be uncomfortable with the truth of the situation and feels the need to reshape it in their favor. It’s a way of introducing an alternative version of events or reasons that make their actions seem more acceptable.

Always listen carefully to what follows “It’s just that…” and question whether it sounds like a truthful explanation or a crafted narrative.

Truth doesn’t usually need dressing up. If someone has to justify or excuse their actions frequently, they might not be telling you the whole story.

9) “But…”

The word “but” is a powerful conjunction often used to introduce a contrasting point. However, when it comes to detecting lies, “but” can serve as a critical red flag.

The phrase preceding “but” usually attempts to create a positive impression or pacify the listener. The part following “but” often contains the real message or intention, potentially revealing dishonesty.

If someone frequently uses “but” to contradict their initial statements, it could indicate they’re trying to mislead or manipulate the situation.

Keep in mind, the truth usually stands on its own without the need for contradictions.

If someone’s words are filled with multiple “buts,” it’s worth considering whether they’re painting an accurate picture or just a favorable one.

Final thoughts: It’s all about perception

The complexities of human communication and behavior are deeply intertwined with our understanding and perception of truth.

An interesting point to consider is the role of linguistic cues in detecting dishonesty. The phrases we’ve discussed are not a foolproof lie detector, but they can serve as a guide to navigate conversations with a more discerning eye.

Remember, everyone has their unique communication style. Some people might use these phrases innocently, out of habit or preference. It’s essential not to rush to judgment based solely on someone’s choice of words.

Instead, consider these phrases as part of a larger puzzle. Pair them with your observations of the person’s behavior, their consistency in words and actions, and your intuition.

After all, uncovering truth is often less about what is being said and more about how it’s being said. So the next time you hear these phrases, take a moment to reflect. Are they merely words or veiled falsehoods? The answer might just surprise you.