If someone displays these 7 subtle behaviors, they’re probably not a great person
I’ve always believed that people are like books. You can’t judge them by their covers, but by their actions.
And let’s face it, we’ve all come across someone who appears to be a great person on the surface, but after spending some time with them, you start to see that they’re not exactly who they seemed to be.
You see, it’s the subtle behaviors that often reveal the most about a person’s character. And while we’d all like to believe in the goodness of people, the reality is not everyone is as great as they appear to be.
So, if you’re asking yourself “How can I tell if someone is not a great person?”, I’ve got your back.
Let’s dive into some of these subtle behaviors that might indicate someone isn’t as fantastic as they first appear. It might be a bit uncomfortable to face these truths, but understanding them can save you from unnecessary disappointment down the line.
This isn’t about being overly critical or judgmental. It’s about recognizing patterns and making informed decisions about who we let into our lives. And trust me, this knowledge can be a real game-changer.
1) Lack of empathy
Let’s start with something that’s often overlooked – empathy. This is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, and it’s a key characteristic of a good person.
Now, we’re not talking about grand gestures of kindness here. It’s more about the small things, like being there for you when you’re having a tough day, or showing genuine interest in your life.
But if someone consistently seems detached from your feelings or indifferent to your experiences, it could be a sign that they lack empathy. And unfortunately, without this essential trait, it’s hard for a person to be truly great.
Remember, empathy is not just about understanding emotions on a surface level. It’s about truly caring for others and their well-being.
2) They’re always right
Have you ever met someone who just can’t admit when they’re wrong? I have, and let me tell you, it’s a frustrating experience.
A few years ago, I had a friend named Sam. He was smart, funny, and charismatic – the life of every party. But there was one significant issue. Sam could never accept that he was wrong, no matter how clear the evidence was.
Whether it was a trivial matter like a movie trivia question or something more serious like a disagreement about personal boundaries, Sam always had to be right. He would twist facts, change his previous statements, and even discredit others just to maintain his stance.
At first, I brushed it off thinking it was his competitive streak. But over time, I realized this behavior was more about his ego than anything else. Sam’s inability to admit his mistakes or consider other perspectives showed a lack of humility and respect for others’ views.
This constant need to be right can be draining and can create a toxic environment.
3) Gossip is their second language
I’m not talking about the occasional harmless chatter we all engage in. No, I’m talking about the kind of gossip that’s mean-spirited, destructive, and serves no purpose but to belittle others.
Ever been around someone who constantly talks about others behind their back? It’s uncomfortable, isn’t it? They make you question what they might be saying about you when you’re not around.
I once knew a person like that. Let’s call her Jane. Jane was the type of person who always had the latest scoop on everyone. At first, it was entertaining – like being privy to some sort of secret club.
But as time passed, I began to see the ugly side of it. The way Jane spoke about others was a reflection of her own insecurities. It was as if putting others down gave her a sense of superiority.
This habitual gossiping is a subtle sign that someone might not be as great as they seem. It shows a lack of respect for others and a disregard for their feelings. After all, great people elevate others, they don’t bring them down.
4) They never take responsibility
Taking responsibility for our actions is a fundamental part of being a decent human being. It shows maturity, integrity, and respect for others.
But not everyone grasps this concept.
I’m sure you’ve come across someone who always plays the victim. No matter what happens, it’s never their fault. Somehow, they always find a way to shift the blame onto others.
This behavior can be incredibly damaging, especially in close relationships. It creates a toxic environment where nothing gets resolved because the person refuses to acknowledge their part in the problem.
Avoiding responsibility doesn’t just show a lack of integrity; it also prevents personal growth. Because if we can’t admit our mistakes, how can we learn from them?
So if someone consistently avoids taking responsibility for their actions, it’s a clear sign that they might not be as great as they seem.
5) They’re consistently negative
Negativity can be contagious, and the constant presence of a pessimist can be draining.
You might have come across someone who always sees the glass as half empty. They find fault in everything, complain incessantly, and struggle to see the positive side of life.
Here’s the interesting part. According to research from the Mayo Clinic, people with a positive outlook actually live longer. They’re also less likely to get depressed or stressed out.
Now, we all have bad days where we lean towards negativity. But if someone is consistently negative, it can be a sign that they may not be as great as they seem.
Living with a positive outlook doesn’t mean ignoring life’s difficulties. It means facing them with optimism and resilience. So, if someone is persistently negative, it might be worth reevaluating their place in your life.
6) They’re dismissive of your feelings
We all want to feel understood and validated, especially by the people we care about. It’s a basic human need.
However, you might have encountered someone who brushes off your feelings as though they’re insignificant. This could be a subtle sign that they’re not as great as they seem.
I’ve been there, and it’s tough. You share something important with them, perhaps something that’s been bothering you, and their response is dismissive or indifferent. It leaves you feeling unheard and unimportant.
It’s crucial to keep in mind that your feelings matter. Everyone has the right to express their emotions without fear of being judged or dismissed.
The people who truly care about you will take the time to listen and validate your feelings, even if they don’t fully understand them. And that’s what makes them great.
7) They don’t respect your boundaries
In any relationship, respect for personal boundaries is non-negotiable. It’s a clear indicator of how someone values you as a person.
If you’ve ever felt uncomfortable because someone consistently oversteps your boundaries, despite having voiced your concerns, it’s a red flag.
Boundaries protect our mental and physical well-being. They’re a measure of self-respect and self-care. Anyone who dismisses them is showing a fundamental lack of respect for your autonomy and well-being.
Remember, you have the right to establish your own boundaries and expect them to be respected. Anyone who doesn’t honor that isn’t worth your time or energy.
Final thoughts
We’ve taken a journey down a path that’s not always easy to tread – recognizing that someone might not be as great as they initially seemed. It can be tough, I know. But remember, recognizing these signs is about protecting your peace and well-being.
That’s not to say people can’t change. Everyone has the capacity for growth and change, and sometimes people act in certain ways because of their own fears or insecurities.
The key takeaway here is awareness. By recognizing these behaviors, you’re better equipped to make informed decisions about the relationships in your life. You have the power to surround yourself with positivity and respect.
So, take some time to reflect on your relationships. And most importantly, remember: You deserve to be treated with kindness, respect, and understanding. You deserve relationships that uplift you, not bring you down.
And with this knowledge, you’re one step closer to ensuring that those in your life truly reflect the greatness you embody. After all, we are the company we keep.