If someone displays these 9 subtle behaviors, they have a high level of empathy

Mia Zhang by Mia Zhang | December 1, 2024, 10:48 am

I’ve always been fascinated by the quiet superpowers people carry around every day.

For me, empathy tops the list.

It’s not loud or attention-seeking—it’s subtle, often showing up in the smallest gestures.

Like the friend who notices your mood shift before you say a word or the stranger who offers a kind word at just the right moment.

Empathy is like a silent thread weaving us closer together, and if you know what to look for, you’ll see it everywhere.

That’s why I’ve put together this list of nine behaviors that reveal someone’s high level of empathy.

They’re the little signs that might go unnoticed but speak volumes.

Let’s dive in, and maybe you’ll even spot a little of this magic in yourself.

1) They really listen

In a world full of noise, a good listener is like a breath of fresh air.

Now, when I say ‘listening’, I don’t just mean nodding along while someone else talks.

No, empathetic people practice active listening.

Scientists describe it as a conversation in which the listener acknowledges receipt of the information and provides feedback to the sender to ensure mutual understanding.

They give their undivided attention, making you feel as though you’re the only person in the room.

Their focus is on understanding your thoughts and feelings, not just hearing your words.

Empathetic people don’t interrupt or try to steer the conversation towards themselves.

Instead, they allow you to express yourself fully, and they respond with thoughtful comments that show they’ve truly absorbed what you’ve said.

This kind of deep, attentive listening is a sure sign that someone has a high level of empathy.

They’re not just interested in your story – they want to understand your experience.

2) They pick up on non-verbal cues

Let me share a personal experience with you.

I have a friend named Sarah who, I believe, is one of the most empathetic people I know.

I remember one day, I was having a rough time but didn’t want to burden anyone with my problems.

Sarah noticed something was off immediately. We were at a group gathering, and I was trying to put on a brave face.

Sarah spotted the subtle changes in my body language – the forced smile, the way I was quieter than usual.

She gently pulled me aside and asked if everything was okay.

She didn’t pressure me to share what was going on but simply let me know she was there if I needed to talk.

Empathetic people like Sarah have this incredible ability to pick up on non-verbal cues.

In fact, according to research, 80% of all communication is non-verbal, so learning body language cues is important when it comes to maintaining relationships.

This kind of perceptiveness is a strong indicator of high empathy.

They see beyond the words and understand the emotions behind them.

3) They feel emotions deeply

Empathetic people don’t just understand other people’s emotions – they feel them, too.

It’s like they have an emotional echo that resonates with the feelings of those around them.

This is because empathy is actually hardwired into our brains.

Neuroscientists have discovered something called mirror neurons, which fire both when we perform an action and when we see someone else performing the same action.

This includes not just physical actions, but emotional responses as well.

So when someone else is happy, sad or angry, empathetic people literally feel a echo of those emotions inside their own minds.

This helps them to understand others’ experiences on a deep, intuitive level.

This profound emotional understanding is another telltale sign of high empathy.

Empathetic people aren’t just observers – they’re participants in the emotional lives of those around them.

4) They display genuine kindness

Kindness is a language that the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

This quote by Mark Twain perfectly encapsulates the essence of empathetic people.

An empathetic person’s kindness isn’t a one-time act or a display for attention.

Instead, it’s an integral part of their character, a constant undercurrent in their interactions with others.

Whether it’s offering a comforting word, helping someone in need, or just being there to lend an ear, they go out of their way to make others feel better.

Their kindness is not dependent on who the person is or what they can get in return.

This genuine kindness, driven by a deep understanding of people’s feelings and experiences, is a clear indicator of high empathy.

They don’t just sympathize – they empathize and act upon it by spreading kindness.

5) They’re non-judgmental

We all have our moments of weakness, our quirks, and our personal battles.

Empathetic people understand this.

They realize that everyone is fighting their own battles, often hidden beneath the surface.

This understanding leads them to be non-judgmental.

They don’t hastily label or categorize people based on limited information or a single interaction.

Instead, they keep an open mind, allowing room for the complexities and contradictions that make up a human being.

This non-judgmental nature is another subtle sign of high empathy.

Empathetic people see beyond superficial labels and understand the complex tapestry of emotions, experiences, and motivations that make us who we are.

They see us in our entirety, and they accept us just as we are.

6) They make people feel seen and valued

There’s a beautiful thing that happens when someone truly sees you – not just the version of you that you present to the world, but the real, authentic, sometimes messy you.

It’s like a weight is lifted off your shoulders.

You feel valued, understood, and accepted for who you truly are.

Empathetic people have a knack for this.

They see beyond the surface and acknowledge the worth in every person they encounter.

They make you feel like you matter, that your feelings are valid and important.

They recognize and affirm someone’s inherent value.

When someone makes you feel seen and valued in this way, chances are they have a high level of empathy.

They see the world through a lens of compassion and understanding, always seeking to uplift those around them.

7) They’re excellent at diffusing tension

A while back, I found myself in a heated argument with a colleague over a project we were working on.

Emotions were high, and both of us were stubbornly sticking to our perspectives.

Just when things were about to escalate, another colleague, Mia, stepped in.

She didn’t take sides but instead, she calmly acknowledged both of our viewpoints and helped us see the common ground we were missing.

Her ability to diffuse the tension was remarkable.

By showing empathy for both of us, she was able to turn a confrontational situation into a collaborative one.

People with high empathy levels are often great at resolving conflicts.

They can pick up on rising tensions and use their understanding of people’s emotions to help find a middle ground.

It’s almost like they have a sixth sense for harmony, which can be a real blessing in challenging situations.

8) They are patient and understanding

Patience is a virtue, and it’s one that empathetic people often possess in abundance.

They understand that everyone has their own pace, their own unique process of dealing with things.

And they respect this. They won’t rush you or make you feel inadequate for needing more time.

Whether you’re slow to open up about your feelings, or you’re struggling to master a new skill, they’re there by your side, offering understanding and support rather than pressure or judgement.

This patience isn’t just about waiting; it’s about offering space – space for growth, space for healing, space for being human.

It’s a subtle yet powerful demonstration of empathy.

A person who consistently shows this kind of patience and understanding is likely to have a high level of empathy.

9) They put themselves in other’s shoes

At the heart of empathy is the ability to put oneself in someone else’s shoes.

They are able to experience their emotions, their challenges, their joys, as if they were their own.

This is what empathetic people do.

They immerse themselves in other people’s experiences to truly understand their feelings and perspectives.

This ability to step into another person’s shoes is the essence of empathy.

It’s what allows empathetic people to forge deep connections, diffuse conflicts, and uplift those around them.

It’s the ultimate sign of high empathy – a beacon that lights the way to deeper understanding and genuine compassion.

Final thoughts

Empathy isn’t something you shout from the rooftops; it’s what you quietly give to the world.

It’s in the way you listen, notice, and show up for people—especially when they need it most.

As I wrote this, I couldn’t help but think of all the times someone’s small act of empathy made a big difference in my life.

Maybe you can think of a moment like that too.

Here’s the thing: these nine signs of empathy aren’t just traits to admire in others.

They’re reminders of how we can show up better for the people around us.

It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being present.

Empathy doesn’t just connect us—it transforms us.

So the next time you’re tempted to rush past someone’s emotions, take a moment. Feel their world, even just a little.

You might be surprised at how much it changes yours.