The combination of a woman who is both genuine and caring are kinda hard to find these days.

With so many people learning how to butter up people in a conversation just to get what they want, it can be quite difficult to find someone who’s not just  being “fake nice.”

So how do you find these rare women in a sea of small talk and random conversations? 

Pay attention to how they talk.

Here are 12 phrases  they usually use in a convo.

1) “Do you have five minutes?”

If you say no, she’ll say “Well, tell me when you’re free then.”

And if you say yes, she’ll try to get her point across as quickly as possible.

She’s not being a doormat. She’s just being respectful.

That’s because a woman who genuinely cares for others cares about their time. 

She won’t just dump her emotional baggage and talk non-stop just because you’re not doing anything.

Even if you’re just on the couch watching a st*pid show, she knows you could be taking some rest—something that she thinks you truly deserve.

2) “Everything okay?”

A woman who’s caring would notice when you’re acting a bit strange—let’s say if you’re unusually quiet or you look stressed.

And unlike others who just pretend to be blind, they’d tell you that they’ve actually noticed.

Then they’ll give you an opportunity to open up by asking “Is everything okay?”

She truly cares about others and she doesn’t want anyone to feel alone in whatever they’re going through.

3) “I’m here if you need me”

Let’s say she’s a teacher or a boss.

When she gives instructions and you pretend to understand everything she’s saying, she will end with “I’m here if you need me.”

Why?

So you won’t be shy to ask for help.

She’s perfectly aware that you could be shy to ask questions and clarifications—that you’d think you’re inconveniencing her.

And so, she’d say this line to reassure you that no matter what, you can just reach out to her and she’ll be there in a heartbeat.

And this applies to many other situations, too.

If you just shared your problems with her, 

If you’re doing something for the first time,

If your life has changed dramatically,

She’ll say “I’m here if you need me” and really mean it.

4) “You don’t have to!”

When she invites you to attend a party or if she asks you to do something (like donate money), she’ll say “You don’t have to.”

And she really means it!

It’s not a line she says to be passive-aggressive or manipulative. 

You’ll feel from her relaxed and open demeanor that there is zero pressure.

You know because you’ve said “no” to her several times in the past and yet, she remains cool about it.

5) “I know it sounds complicated, but…”

If you’re having a hard time grasping something, she’ll say this line…but not in a condescending way.

She’ll add “I also got so confused at first” or “I had a headache trying to figure it out.”

Again, when a woman uses this phrase, she wants you to not feel intimidated by her.

She wants you to know that it’s okay if you don’t understand something or if you mess things up.

You know you can show your soft underbelly and you won’t be judged. 

You’re safe.

6) “I’m all ears”

“Attention is one of the rarest forms of generosity.”

In a world where attention is currency, giving it to someone fully is a form of love.

A woman who uses this phrase wants to assure you that she’ll be listening to whatever it is you want to say.

That you’re her top priority at that moment.

That she’ll try her best to understand you.

That she can be your safe space.

Essentially, even if there’s a thousand things happening in the world right now, you are all that matters to her.

7) “I really like it!”

But what makes her different is that she’s not just flattering you.

She’s actually genuine when she gives praise!

So when she gives you compliments, you know it’s not just to make you like HER, she really means it.

Genuine compliments can lift our spirits, especially if we’re a little insecure (and aren’t we all?).

That’s why an incredibly genuine and caring woman would not keep her admiration for the things you do a secret. She’d openly express it!

8) “There’s something I need to tell you”

A woman who’s genuine will tell you things you NEED to know—even if it can make things a little bit uncomfortable.

While she won’t stick her nose in other people’s business, if you’re close, she’d choose to tell you than keep her mouth shut.

She’d tell you that she saw your wife holding hands with another man.

She’d tell you if your boss is planning to fire you.

She’d tell you discretely if your foot stinks before other people notice it.

Why?

Because she’ll never let people diss you behind your back!

So even if it is difficult for her too, she musters the courage to tell you because she values you.

9) “Well, that sucks”

If you tell her bad news, she won’t gaslight you.

She won’t go “Gee, I thought you were in BIG trouble. That’s it?”

Neither will she go straight to finding solutions or reciting inspirational quotes like she’s some guru.

Instead, she’d commiserate with you.

She’d acknowledge that what you went through wasn’t easy and not say a word more.

Genuine care is not just about offering solutions, it’s also about letting another person feel that what they’re feeling is valid.

10) “Enough about me, tell me about you”

Do you know those people who could just talk about themselves for days?

Well, a woman who’s incredibly caring isn’t like that!

She’d make sure that everyone else would be able to speak up during conversations.

So yes, when she has an opportunity to talk, she would.

But she has the self-awareness to stop and pass the mic to the person she’s talking to.

Even in a circle of people, she’s the person who notices when someone hasn’t been able to share but would like to and passes the conversation onto them. 

When they know they have people’s attention, they’re not greedy about keeping it and will shine the light on people around them too.

11) “That’s not fair”

Even if she’s nice, she’s genuine and honest.

And so if she thinks what you’re doing is not fair or not nice, she’d say it (in the kindest manner possible).

An incredibly genuine and caring person cares about fairness.

She will call you out if you’re being unfair to her or to others.

But don’t worry. With this kind of woman, you can rest assured that she’s got your back too if other people are being unfair to you.

12) “I believe in you”

From time to time, we just want someone to remind us that we’re good enough.

And to you, that someone is her.

Without exaggeration, she always reminds you of your skills and talents.

Because she’s genuine, she won’t say “You’re the best painter!”

Instead, she’d be honest and say “I really like how you can make colors pop. Keep at it.”

This kind of respect and faith in you encourages you to become better.

And if that isn’t care, I don’t know what is.

Final thoughts:

If you find a woman who uses these phrases in conversations with you, remember to never take them for granted because you’re incredibly lucky to have them in your life.

And if you’d like to be more genuine and caring yourself, try to practice a few of these with attentive listening and see how your relationships improve.

You might be surprised that even the gentle shift of a few small phrases can have such a deep impact in making people feel how genuinely caring you can be.