If a man uses these 7 phrases on a date, he isn’t worth your time
Navigating the dating world can often feel like walking through a minefield. You’re never quite sure if the charming individual sitting across from you is genuine or masking their true intentions.
As a woman, it’s essential to be aware of the verbal cues that can indicate whether a man is genuinely interested in getting to know you, or if he’s just looking to waste your time.
In this article, we’ll explore 7 phrases that, if uttered by a man on a date, should raise red flags about his true worth.
This isn’t about being judgmental or jumping to conclusions; it’s about empowering women to recognize when they might be dealing with someone who doesn’t value their time or respect their worth.
Ready to dive in? Let’s get started.
1) “You’re not like other girls”
Has this phrase ever slipped through his lips during your conversation? If so, it’s time to hit the brakes.
While this might initially come off as a compliment, it’s actually a subtle form of manipulation known as ‘negging’. The underlying message here is that there’s something inherently wrong with being ‘like other girls’. This generalization not only devalues women but also shows his lack of respect and understanding for individuality.
So ask yourself: Do you really want to invest your time in someone who uses such a backhanded compliment to make you feel ‘special’? Is this the kind of man who can truly appreciate you for who you are?
2) “My ex was crazy”
This should be a major red flag. When he tells you his ex was ‘crazy’, it not only shows a lack of respect and maturity, but also suggests he might have been the problem in his past relationships.
For instance, I once had a friend named Sarah who went on a date with a guy who couldn’t stop talking about how ‘insane’ his ex was.
He made it seem like he was the innocent victim of her unhinged behavior. Sarah, giving him the benefit of the doubt, continued to see him.
A few months down the line, she realized that he was manipulative and emotionally unavailable.
The so-called ‘crazy’ ex? Turns out she was just an ordinary woman who had been dealing with his poor behavior.
Remember, there are always two sides to every story. If he’s quick to label his ex as ‘crazy’, he might be trying to deflect any responsibility for the failed relationship. It could also indicate how he handles conflict and treats women when things don’t go his way.
3) “I don’t see the point in feminism”
As Ruth Bader Ginsburg, a champion of gender equality and women’s rights once said, “Women belong in all places where decisions are being made.” If a man tells you he doesn’t see the point in feminism, it’s a clear indicator he doesn’t understand or appreciate the struggle for gender equality.
Feminism isn’t about women being better than men; it’s about equal rights and opportunities for all genders.
A man who dismisses feminism may not recognize the systemic issues that have led to the need for such a movement in the first place.
Now, this doesn’t mean that he needs to be on the frontline of every women’s rights march, but he should at least respect and understand your right to be treated as an equal.
If he can’t get behind that basic principle, then it might be time to reconsider if he’s worth your precious time.
4) “I don’t believe in labels”
Picture this: You’ve been seeing each other for a while now, and things are going well. You enjoy his company, and you feel a connection.
But when you bring up the topic of defining the relationship, he throws in the “I don’t believe in labels” card.
While it’s completely okay to take things slow and not rush into a label, it becomes a problem when this phrase is used as an excuse to avoid commitment or keep the relationship ambiguous indefinitely.
This could indicate that he’s not serious about you or that he wants to keep his options open.
Communication and clarity are key in any relationship. If he can’t give you a straight answer about where you two stand, it might be an indication that he might not be ready for a serious relationship, or worse, he’s stringing you along while exploring other options.
5) “I hate drama”
Ever notice that people who claim to ‘hate drama’ often tend to be the ones who create it. This phrase is usually a preemptive strike to absolve himself from any responsibility for causing emotional distress.
When a man says, “I hate drama”, it might seem like he’s a peace-loving individual who avoids conflicts. However, it’s often used as a defense mechanism to shut down any conversation that might involve expressing emotions or discussing problems.
In a healthy relationship, open and constructive communication is crucial.
If he labels every serious conversation or disagreement as ‘drama’, he might be trying to manipulate you into not expressing your feelings or concerns.
Such behavior can lead to a lack of communication and understanding in the relationship, ultimately making it one-sided and unhealthy.
6) “I’m a nice guy”
I remember going on a date with a guy who kept insisting he was a ‘nice guy’. He said it so many times that it started to sound less like a characteristic and more like a sales pitch.
As the saying goes, actions speak louder than words. If someone is genuinely nice, their actions will show it, and they won’t feel the need to constantly announce it.
When a man repeatedly tells you he’s a ‘nice guy’, it’s usually because he wants to create a specific image of himself in your mind.
It can also be an attempt to manipulate you into overlooking his less-than-stellar behavior simply because he claims to be ‘nice’.
A genuinely nice person doesn’t have to convince others of their niceness; it would be inherently evident in their behavior. So if he feels the need to keep reminding you of his ‘niceness’, you might want to take a closer look at his actions rather than his words.
7) “No offense, but…”
“No offense, but…” is often followed by a statement that is, in fact, offensive. This phrase is a classic way of disguising an insult or a critical remark as an innocent observation.
What’s more, it shifts the blame onto you if you choose to get upset, under the guise of ‘just being honest’.
Honesty is crucial in any relationship, but there’s a significant difference between being honest and being hurtful.
If he’s using this phrase to justify disrespectful or insensitive comments, it might indicate a lack of empathy and consideration for your feelings.
In the dating world, it’s essential to find someone who communicates with respect and kindness. If he’s hiding behind this phrase to dish out criticisms or insults, he might not be the one worth your time.
The bottom line
Dating involves navigating through a sea of words and actions to truly understand a person’s intentions. These phrases can serve as early warning signs that the man you’re seeing might not be worth your time.
Remember, respect, honesty, and genuine interest in you as a person are non-negotiables in any relationship.
Have you experienced any of these phrases in your dating journey? Or perhaps there are other phrases that raised red flags for you?
We’d love to hear your experiences and thoughts in the comments below. Your insights might help someone else navigate their own dating maze more effectively.