There’s a fine line between sincere affection and feigned feelings.

Unfortunately, some men can be masters of deception, pretending to be in love while hiding their true intentions.

As Tina Fey, the founder of the Love Connection blog and a seasoned relationship expert, I’ve spent years observing and analyzing romantic behaviors. I’ve discovered that when a man is faking his love, he will usually display certain subtle behaviors that you can learn to recognize.

In this article, I’m going to share with you eight of these telltale signs. It’s not about playing detective, but about empowering you with knowledge so you can make the best decisions for your heart.

Let’s dive in and explore these eight subtle behaviors that may indicate a man is not as smitten as he claims to be.

1) Unmatched actions and words

Love, as they say, is not just about words but also actions.

When a man truly loves you, there’s a harmony between what he says and what he does. His actions validate his words, painting a consistent picture of his feelings for you.

However, if you notice a mismatch between his sweet nothings and his behavior, that’s a red flag. He might say he adores you but fails to show it when it counts. Or perhaps he showers you with affection in private but acts distant in public.

These inconsistencies could indicate he’s not being genuine in his declarations of love. It’s as if he’s reading from a script rather than expressing heartfelt emotions.

Actions speak louder than words. And if his actions don’t match his words, it might be time to question the authenticity of his love.

But let me be clear, everyone can have off days. Don’t jump to conclusions based on a single instance. Look for consistent patterns over time before drawing any conclusions.

2) Avoids future commitments

As someone who has been studying love and relationships for years, I can assure you that a man genuinely in love will be excited about planning a future with you.

However, if he’s always dodging discussions about the future or giving vague answers about your shared path, it could be a sign that his feelings aren’t as deep as he portrays.

When we are in love, we naturally want to share our lives with our partner and build a future together. If he’s reluctant to commit to plans beyond the next few weeks, it could indicate he’s not seeing you in his long-term picture.

As the great writer Mark Twain once said, “Actions speak louder than words but not nearly as often.” If his actions – or rather lack of them – don’t reflect a shared future, it might be time to reconsider the sincerity of his feelings.

It’s important to trust your gut instinct. If something feels off, it probably is. Don’t ignore your intuition. It’s there to protect you.

3) Rarely initiates contact

One powerful indicator of a man’s feelings is his eagerness to reach out to you. When a man is truly in love, he can hardly wait to hear your voice or see your face.

If you find yourself always being the one to initiate contact, it could be a sign that he’s not as invested in the relationship as he should be. You deserve someone who can’t wait to talk to you, who checks in on you, and who wants to share his life with you.

In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I talk about the importance of mutual investment in a relationship. True love is not one-sided; it requires both partners to actively participate and show interest.

Love isn’t about convincing someone to care about you. It’s about finding someone who naturally does. If he’s not initiating contact, it might be worth reconsidering whether his feelings are genuine or not.

4) Overly agreeable

Now, this might come as a surprise. After all, don’t we all love someone who agrees with us and supports our ideas?

Well, yes, to a certain extent. But if a man is always agreeing with everything you say or do, without ever expressing his own opinions or preferences, it could be a subtle sign that he’s faking his love.

In a genuine relationship, there’s room for healthy disagreements. It’s through these clashes that we get to know each other better and grow together. If he’s always nodding his head and never challenging you, it might be because he’s trying too hard to make you believe he’s perfectly compatible with you.

Keep in mind that genuine love encourages individuality and respects differences. It’s perfectly okay – even beneficial – for couples to have different opinions and interests. If he’s constantly mirroring your thoughts without adding his own, you might want to take a closer look at his sincerity.

5) He’s not there in times of need

As someone who has been in love and also experienced heartbreak, I can vouch for the fact that a man who truly loves you will be there for you, especially during tough times.

It’s easy to be around during the fun, happy moments. But it’s during the challenging times that a man’s true feelings are revealed.

If he’s always too busy or unavailable when you need him most, it could be a sign that his love isn’t genuine.

True love is about being a pillar of support for each other, through thick and thin.

If he’s only around when things are easy and disappears in times of need, it might indicate his feelings aren’t as deep as he claims.

A man who truly loves you will stand by your side, not just when it’s convenient, but especially when it’s not.

6) Intimacy feels forced

This one might be hard to swallow, but it needs to be said. If the physical aspect of your relationship feels forced or unnatural, it could be a sign that his love isn’t genuine.

Love is more than just physical attraction, but a genuine emotional connection often leads to a natural and passionate intimate relationship. If he seems disinterested or treats intimacy like a chore, it could be because his emotional investment isn’t as deep as he portrays.

In a loving relationship, intimacy isn’t just about physical satisfaction. It’s about expressing love, creating connection, and building trust. If this vital component feels forced or lacking, it’s worth taking a closer look at the sincerity of his feelings.

As raw and hard as this may sound, you deserve someone who craves your touch not just out of physical desire, but out of deep emotional love.

7) Absence of jealousy

Now, let’s be clear. Unchecked jealousy can be a toxic element in any relationship. But a total absence of it can also be a red flag.

If a man truly loves you, he will naturally feel a twinge of discomfort at the idea of losing you to someone else. If he’s entirely nonchalant when other men express interest in you or when you spend time with male friends, it could indicate his feelings aren’t as strong as he claims.

As the iconic actress Katharine Hepburn once said, “Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get—only with what you are expecting to give—which is everything.” A man who loves you will undoubtedly want to protect your relationship, and a certain level of jealousy can be a natural manifestation of that desire.

It’s not about him controlling or restricting your interactions with others. It’s about him caring enough to fear the thought of losing you. If he never shows even a hint of jealousy, it could be a sign that his love isn’t genuine.

8) He avoids introducing you to his close circle

This is a hard pill to swallow, but it’s crucial to face the truth. If a man truly loves you, he would want to share his world with you. This includes introducing you to his friends and family.

If he’s constantly dodging or making excuses when it comes to meeting his close ones, it could be a sign that he’s not serious about you.

In a genuine relationship, a man would be proud to introduce you as his partner. He would want his loved ones to know about you and for you to be a part of his social circle.

It’s raw and it’s honest, but if he’s keeping you hidden from his close ones, it might be time to question the authenticity of his love. You deserve someone who isn’t just proud but thrilled to have you in their life.

Conclusion

Recognizing the subtle signs of a man faking his love can be challenging. But by paying attention to these behaviors, you can better protect your heart and make more informed decisions about your relationship.

Remember, you deserve someone who loves you genuinely and wholeheartedly. Don’t settle for less.

For more insights and advice on navigating relationships, check out my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship. It’s packed with practical tips and strategies to help you build healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

Stay strong, trust your intuition, and always choose love – the real kind.