If a man casually uses these 8 phrases in a conversation, he isn’t as nice as he seems

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | September 20, 2024, 9:07 am

If a guy flatters you, he seems kind.

If he apologizes when he’s wrong, you might think he’s a gentleman.

But is it really that simple?

The human psyche is far more complex, and what’s on the surface often hides something deeper; it takes sharp intuition to truly understand what lies beneath.

In fact, there are 8 common phrases men use that may reveal a less-than-genuine character.

Let’s dive into the hidden meanings behind these everyday words and uncover what he might really be saying—it’s time to read between the lines!

1) “You’re too sensitive”

We all have feelings, and they can be as turbulent as a stormy sea.

One moment, you’re calm, the next, a wave of emotion sweeps over you.

You can’t control when they come or how they affect you. All you can do is ride them out.

Now, some men might try to belittle your feelings by saying you’re ‘too sensitive’. This is a classic manipulation tactic.

It’s not about being overly sensitive; it’s about being human and responding naturally to situations.

Instead of validating your feelings, he’s dismissing them, which is neither kind nor respectful.

2) “I was just joking”

Ever been in a situation where someone says something hurtful, only to brush it off as a joke when you show your discomfort? Yeah, I’ve been there.

I remember this one time, a guy friend of mine casually made a negative comment about my career choices. When I expressed my displeasure, he quickly said, “I was just joking.”

It wasn’t the first time he’d ‘joked’ about something I cared deeply about.

His ‘jokes’ had a pattern and they always belittled things that mattered to me.

If a man frequently uses the phrase “I was just joking” as a scapegoat for his hurtful comments, he might not be as nice as he seems.

He’s using humor as a mask for his disregard and disrespect.

3) “I don’t see what the big deal is”

Hear a man say, “I don’t see what the big deal is” and an alarm bell should ring.

This phrase often serves to trivialize your concerns or problems.

Interestingly, psychologists have identified this as ‘minimization’, a type of cognitive distortion where people downplay the importance or severity of an event or emotion.

When someone minimizes your feelings or experiences, they’re effectively saying that your reality doesn’t matter. It’s a lack of empathy, a refusal to understand and acknowledge your perspective.

True kindness involves validation and understanding, not dismissal and diminishment.

4) “You’re overthinking it”

We all have moments when our thoughts spiral out of control.

It’s part of being human!

But when a man tells you, “You’re overthinking it,” in a dismissive tone, it’s not always the empathetic advice it seems to be.

This phrase can be a subtle way of invalidating your worries and concerns.

Instead of offering support or trying to understand why you might be feeling anxious, he’s brushing off your emotions as trivial.

The next time you hear this phrase, take a step back and consider the context.

No one should make you feel guilty for trying to make sense of your own emotions.

5) “That’s just how I am”

I’ve met my fair share of people who use this phrase as an excuse for their less-than-stellar behavior.

“That’s just how I am,” they’d say, as if it were justification for being rude or insensitive.

I remember once, a guy snapped at me for a minor mistake.

When I expressed my hurt, he shrugged it off with, “That’s just how I am.”

Using this phrase doesn’t absolve anyone of their actions. It’s not an excuse to treat others poorly.

Nice people take responsibility for their actions and strive to improve, instead of hiding behind fixed notions of their personality.

6) “I’m not like other guys”

At face value, this phrase might seem like a compliment.

After all, who wouldn’t want to be unique or different? But when a man uses it excessively, it can be a subtle warning sign.

“I’m not like other guys” is often a way to set oneself apart, to seem special or superior.

But the hidden implication is that there’s something wrong with ‘other guys’, which can reflect a lack of humility or an inflated sense of self-worth.

Moreover, it can also be manipulative, a way to make you feel lucky or privileged for their attention, which can lead to an imbalanced relationship.

7) “Can’t you take a compliment?”

Compliments are supposed to make you feel good, right?

But when a man says, “Can’t you take a compliment?” after you express discomfort or unease, it’s a red flag.

This phrase is often used to deflect from the fact that his ‘compliment’ might have been inappropriate or unwelcome.

Instead of acknowledging your feelings and apologizing, he’s putting the blame on you for not accepting his words in the way he intended.

It’s a form of gaslighting, making you question your own feelings and reactions.

A true compliment is given with respect and received with comfort.

8) “Trust me”

Trust is earned, not demanded.

So when a man frequently uses the phrase “Trust me” in a conversation, it’s often a cause for concern.

This phrase can be used to manipulate, to convince you to let your guard down or go against your better judgment.

It’s an attempt to bypass the process of building trust naturally through actions and consistent behavior.

Always remember that true trust is built over time, through actions and not just words.

In conclusion

As we wrap up, it’s clear that words can reveal just as much as actions about someone’s character. True kindness and respect aren’t just in what we say, but how we say it, and the intention behind it.

The phrases we’ve covered aren’t definitive proof of someone’s nature, but they are potential red flags suggesting there may be more beneath the surface.

Everyone deserves kindness, and if someone makes you feel otherwise, they might not be as genuine as they appear.

As Maya Angelou once said, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”

In the end, our words are a mirror of our character, and it’s up to us to pay attention and see them for what they truly are!