There’s a thin line between self-love and selfishness.

Identifying a selfish person isn’t always straightforward, as they often mask their true intentions.

Dealing with a selfish person can be draining, as their needs usually come at the expense of others. And being aware of this trait is the first step to managing its impact on you.

In this article, we’ll focus on the signs that reveal you’re dealing with a very selfish individual. It’s about understanding and recognizing these signs so that you can navigate your interactions effectively.

Let’s delve into the telltale signs of a truly selfish person.

1) They always put their needs first

We all have moments when we prioritize our own needs. That’s just being human. But with a selfish person, it’s a consistently recurring pattern.

A major sign of a very selfish person is when they always put their needs above everyone else’s, regardless of the situation or the people involved.

Sometimes, it can be subtle. They might always choose the movie you watch or the restaurant you eat at. Other times, it can be more noticeable, like always talking about themselves or failing to show empathy when you’re going through a tough time.

The key here is to watch for patterns. If they repeatedly focus on their wants and needs while disregarding yours, it’s a clear sign of selfish behavior.

Remember, we’re not just talking about occasional self-centered actions here. Everyone has those. It’s when these behaviors become consistent that you’re likely dealing with a very selfish person.

2) They rarely show empathy

In my experience, one of the most telling signs of a selfish person is a lack of empathy. There was a time when I was going through a rough patch, dealing with job loss and personal issues. I had a friend whom I reached out to, hoping for emotional support.

Instead of lending a sympathetic ear or offering any form of comfort, she simply brushed off my concerns. She quickly changed the topic to her recent vacation and how she was having trouble deciding where to go next.

It wasn’t about her not being able to solve my problems, but the sheer disregard for my feelings was what stung the most. Her inability to empathize and constant need to shift the focus back on herself was a clear sign of her selfish nature.

So if you notice someone who repeatedly fails to show empathy or acknowledge your feelings, you might be dealing with a very selfish person.

3) They don’t appreciate the efforts of others

A common trait among selfish people is their inability to genuinely appreciate or acknowledge the efforts of others. This is often due to their self-centered perspective which limits their ability to see beyond their own needs and desires.

A study conducted by the University of Kent found that individuals with a strong sense of entitlement are less likely to express gratitude. This is because they perceive the good things they receive from others as rights or entitlements, rather than gestures deserving appreciation.

So, if you notice someone consistently failing to express gratitude or acknowledge the efforts and contributions of others, it’s another sign pointing to their selfish nature.

4) They never admit they’re wrong

It’s a universal truth – we all make mistakes. But a sign of maturity and emotional intelligence is the ability to admit when we’re wrong and apologize.

Selfish individuals, however, struggle with this. They find it hard to accept their mistakes and often deflect blame onto others. They’ll go to great lengths to avoid taking responsibility for their actions, even when it’s clear they’re at fault.

This inability to admit wrongdoings can create a toxic environment, as it prevents resolution of conflicts and fosters resentment among those around them.

So if you’re dealing with someone who never seems to admit they’re wrong, you might be dealing with a very selfish person.

5) They have trouble celebrating others’ success

One of the most beautiful aspects of human relationships is the joy we derive from celebrating the achievements of those around us.

However, a selfish person finds it hard to genuinely share in the happiness of others’ success. They may feel threatened or diminished by it, unable to see past their own desires and insecurities.

Their inability to celebrate others’ success often stems from their deep-rooted need to always be the center of attention. When someone else is in the spotlight, they feel sidelined, which is something they can’t handle.

So if you notice someone who seems begrudging or dismissive about your accomplishments or those of others, it could be a sign that you’re dealing with a very selfish person. Remember, genuine joy for others reflects a spirit of generosity and empathy – traits that are often missing in a selfish individual.

6) They take more than they give

Relationships are a two-way street. They thrive on mutual give and take. But with a selfish person, the scales are often tipped in their favor.

I remember being in a relationship where I felt like I was constantly giving – emotionally, physically, and even financially. But when it was my turn to need support, it felt like pulling teeth. It was always about their problems, their needs, their time. My needs were often overlooked or dismissed as unimportant.

This imbalance was exhausting and left me feeling depleted. It was a clear sign that I was dealing with a selfish person.

So if you find yourself in a situation where you’re constantly giving and rarely receiving, it’s time to reassess the relationship. It’s likely you’re dealing with someone who is more focused on taking than giving back.

7) They’re excessively controlling

Selfish people often have an innate need to control those around them. This control could manifest in various ways, from dictating how you spend your time to making decisions on your behalf without consulting you.

This controlling behavior stems from their desire to ensure things always go their way. They’re more interested in satisfying their needs and wants than considering what’s best for others.

So if you find yourself constantly being controlled or dictated by someone, it’s a clear sign of their selfish nature. Everyone deserves a say in matters that concern them, and anyone who tries to take that away is likely putting their interests before yours.

8) They lack genuine interest in others

At the crux of it all, a very selfish person exhibits a distinct lack of genuine interest in others. They tend to steer conversations towards themselves and show little curiosity about other people’s feelings, experiences, or opinions.

This is the most telling sign of a selfish person – their world revolves around them, and they have little room for others unless it serves their interests. Be it in conversations or relationships, if you feel like you’re an audience rather than a participant, it’s likely you’re dealing with a very selfish person.

Final thoughts: It’s about boundaries

When it comes to dealing with a very selfish person, understanding and acknowledging their traits is just the first step. The real challenge lies in setting clear boundaries.

Boundaries are crucial in maintaining our mental health and well-being, particularly when dealing with self-centered individuals. They allow us to protect ourselves, ensuring that we’re not consistently sidelined or overpowered by the needs and wants of others.

Remember, your feelings, needs, and opinions are as valid and important as anyone else’s. Don’t let the selfishness of others overshadow your worth.

After all, the words of American author Bryant H. McGill ring true: “One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.” If you’re dealing with a person who consistently fails to show this respect, it might be time to reassess your relationship with them.

As you move forward, keep these signs in mind and remember – you have every right to assert your boundaries and demand respect.