If you feel like an outsider in life, these 8 truths might explain why

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | January 16, 2025, 5:34 pm

Feeling like an outsider is something we’ve all experienced at one point or another. It’s a nagging sense that you just don’t fit in, no matter how hard you try.

Sometimes, it’s not about trying harder but understanding better. There are certain truths about life that can shed light on why you might feel sidelined.

This article will dive into eight of these truths. They might not make the feeling vanish instantly, but they will certainly offer you a fresh perspective and perhaps, a way forward.

Stay with me as we unravel this together, starting with truth number one.

1) It’s not always about you

In life, it’s easy to internalize every glance, every comment and every situation. The truth is, most people are too engrossed in their own lives to analyze your every move.

Feeling like an outsider can often be a result of overthinking. You perceive people’s actions and words as a reflection on you, when in reality, it might have nothing to do with you at all.

Understanding this can help alleviate the sense of being an outsider. Once you realize that much of the world isn’t actually focused on you, it can help you feel less isolated and more connected.

Remember, it’s not always about you. And that’s perfectly okay.

2) Fitting in isn’t the same as belonging

I’ve spent too many years trying to fit in, trying to mold myself into the person I thought others wanted me to be. I played roles, masked my true self, and in the process, I lost sight of who I was.

One day, it hit me. Fitting in isn’t the same as belonging. In fact, it’s the complete opposite. When you fit in, you hide your authentic self to be accepted by others. But when you belong, you are accepted for who you truly are.

Feeling like an outsider might just mean that you’re trying to fit into places where you don’t genuinely belong. Finding your tribe, where you can be unapologetically yourself, can change that feeling of being an outsider into a sense of true belonging.

3) Everyone feels like an outsider at times

Here’s something you might not expect: everyone, even the most seemingly popular and confident individuals, feel like outsiders at times. In fact, a psychological phenomenon called the “impostor syndrome” affects an estimated 70% of people.

This syndrome is characterized by an internalized fear of being exposed as a “fraud”, despite evident success or competence. Many successful professionals believe they don’t deserve their jobs and are just fooling people, reinforcing their outsider status.

So, if you’re feeling like an outsider, remember that you’re in good company. Most of us feel the same way, more often than we let on.

4) Differences can be strengths

Feeling like an outsider often comes from the perception that we’re different from those around us. But remember, differences can be strengths, not weaknesses.

What sets you apart might be your unique perspective, your individual skills, or your distinct experiences. These differences can enable you to bring fresh ideas, solve problems creatively, and contribute in ways others can’t.

Next time you feel like an outsider because of your differences, remind yourself that those very differences might be your greatest assets. Embrace them, nurture them, and watch them transform you from an outsider to a valuable contributor.

5) You’re not alone in your loneliness

Feeling like an outsider can often come with a heavy sense of loneliness. But please remember, you’re not alone in feeling this way.

Across the globe, countless others are experiencing the same feelings. Living in a world that often values conformity over individuality, it’s no surprise that many people feel like they don’t quite fit in.

So, if you feel like an outsider, know that there are others out there who understand your experience. Reach out, share your feelings, and you might just find a community of “outsiders” ready to support and embrace you as you are.

6) It’s okay to want to fit in

I’ve spent countless nights wondering why I couldn’t just be like everyone else. Why couldn’t I enjoy the same things, laugh at the same jokes, or fit into the same mold?

Over time, I’ve come to understand that it’s okay to want to fit in. It’s a basic human desire to be part of a group, to feel accepted and loved. But it’s also okay, and necessary, to accept yourself as you are.

Feeling like an outsider might be a sign that you’re trying to fit into the wrong crowd or suppressing your true self to meet others’ expectations. The key is to find balance – seek acceptance from others, but not at the cost of your authenticity.

7) Being an outsider can lead to growth

Feeling like an outsider isn’t always a negative thing. In fact, it can be a catalyst for personal growth.

When you’re on the outside looking in, you have the opportunity to observe, reflect, and gain a broader understanding of people and situations. This unique vantage point can foster empathy, enhance critical thinking, and inspire creativity.

Remember, personal growth often comes from stepping outside of our comfort zones. So, embrace your outsider status as an opportunity for self-discovery and growth.

8) You define your worth

At the end of the day, the most important thing to remember is this: You define your worth, not other people’s opinions or the societal norms.

Feeling like an outsider can shake our self-esteem. But remember, your value doesn’t diminish just because you feel misunderstood or out of place.

Your worth is inherent. It’s not contingent on fitting in or being accepted by others. Own your worth, embrace your individuality, and let no one make you feel like an outsider in your own life.

The final truth: Embrace your outsider status

It’s important to recognize that feeling like an outsider is not necessarily a drawback. In fact, many great minds in history—artists, inventors, philosophers—have felt like outsiders during their lives. Their unique perspectives allowed them to see the world differently and contribute in meaningful ways.

Consider the words of Albert Einstein: “The one who follows the crowd will usually get no further than the crowd. The one who walks alone is likely to find himself in places no one has ever been before.”

Feeling like an outsider may simply mean you are on a path less travelled, ready to explore the unexplored and discover the undiscovered. It’s a journey that can lead to innovation, creativity, and profound personal growth.

So, rather than fighting this feeling, embrace it. Your outsider status might just be your ticket to a life less ordinary. As you journey through life, remember that it’s okay to be different, to stand out, and most importantly, to be your true self.