Let’s face it, we all have our moments of being difficult. But are you consistently challenging to be around?

The difference lies in understanding. Being a difficult person means you’re often unaware of the negative impact you have on those around you.

So, could you be that difficult person everyone’s trying to avoid? Well, there are telltale signs that point to a hard-to-handle personality.

Here’s my take on the “8 strong signs that you are a very difficult person”. Don’t worry, this isn’t a blame game. It’s about awareness and taking the first step towards change. Let’s dive in!

1) You’re often the center of drama

Ever notice that drama seems to follow you wherever you go? And no, I don’t mean the exciting kind of drama that keeps life interesting. I’m talking about the kind that drains energy and creates tension.

Being the constant center of conflict can be a strong indication that you’re a difficult person. This isn’t about having one-off disagreements or arguments – those are normal in any relationship.

The issue arises when these conflicts become a recurring theme in your life. If you always find yourself in the middle of arguments, misunderstandings or disputes, it could be a sign that you’re contributing to these situations more than you realize.

Remember, it’s rare for one person to always be the ‘victim’ in every scenario. So if you’re always at the heart of some drama, it might be time for some self-reflection.

2) People often seem taken aback by your comments

Relating to others is a two-way street, and communication is key. But if your words often leave people looking shocked or uncomfortable, it might be a sign that you’re being too blunt or insensitive.

I remember this one time at a friend’s gathering. We were all sharing updates about our lives, laughing, and having a good time. When it was my turn, I casually mentioned how I thought one of our mutual friends was being overly dramatic about her recent breakup.

There was an awkward silence. A few people shifted uncomfortably in their seats, and one even tried to change the subject quickly.

It hit me then – my comment, intended to be a light-hearted opinion, had been way too harsh. It was a wake-up call about how my words could impact others. And if you often find yourself in similar situations, it could be an indication that you’re being difficult without even realizing it.

3) You struggle with empathy

Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, is a key characteristic of emotional intelligence. But, did you know that being low on empathy can make you come across as difficult?

In the world of psychology, empathy is not just a ‘nice to have’ trait. It’s crucial for our social interactions. When we lack empathy, we can unintentionally hurt others’ feelings or seem unapproachable.

For example, imagine a friend is going through a rough time and you respond with “Well, life isn’t fair”. While it might be true, it dismisses their feelings and comes off as insensitive.

So if you often find it hard to put yourself in others’ shoes or dismiss their feelings, it could be a sign you’re more difficult than you think.

4) You’re resistant to change

Change is a part of life. It often pushes us out of our comfort zones and helps us grow. But if you find yourself constantly resisting change, it could be a sign that you’re a difficult person.

Perhaps you always insist on sticking to your own ways, even when presented with new or more effective methods. Or maybe you become defensive when others suggest changes to your plans or ideas. This resistance can create friction with those around you and make it challenging for them to cooperate with you.

It’s important to remember that being open to change doesn’t mean always giving in. It’s about being flexible and willing to adapt when it benefits the overall situation.

5) You don’t apologize easily

We all make mistakes – it’s part of being human. But owning up to those mistakes and apologizing sincerely? That’s where the real growth happens.

If you find it hard to say “I’m sorry” when you’re wrong, or if you often give half-hearted apologies just to end arguments, it could be a sign that you’re being difficult.

Apologizing doesn’t make you weak; instead, it shows strength and maturity. It shows that you value the relationship more than your ego.

Remember, a heartfelt apology can heal wounds and mend relationships. But refusing to apologize can create resentment and distance. So if apologies are a rare thing for you, it might be time for some introspection.

6) You’re often dismissive of others’ ideas

Collaboration and respect for others’ perspectives are key to any successful interaction. But if you find yourself frequently dismissing others’ ideas without consideration, it could be a sign that you’re a difficult person.

I remember in college, during a group project, I was so convinced that my approach was the best that I didn’t even consider my teammates’ suggestions. I was dismissive and adamant, which not only led to tension in the group but also resulted in a lower grade than we could have achieved.

Looking back, I realize that my unwillingness to consider other perspectives was not only unfair but also limiting. It’s a lesson I’ve carried with me since then.

If you’re often dismissive of others’ thoughts or ideas, it’s worth reflecting on why that might be and how it impacts those around you.

7) You’re not open to feedback

Feedback, both positive and negative, helps us grow and improve. But if you find yourself getting defensive or upset when someone offers you constructive criticism, it could be a sign that you’re difficult.

Being open to feedback doesn’t mean agreeing with everything that’s said. It’s about listening, considering the other person’s perspective, and then deciding if there’s something valuable you can take from it.

If you’re not receptive to feedback, it can create a barrier between you and others. It might make them hesitant to share their thoughts or contribute in the future.

Remember, a growth mindset embraces feedback as an opportunity for improvement. So if accepting feedback is a struggle for you, it might be an area worth addressing.

8) You struggle to maintain close relationships

At the end of the day, our relationships with others are what truly matter. If you find it difficult to maintain close, meaningful relationships, it could be a sign that you’re more difficult than you realize.

If friendships or romantic relationships seem to end without clear reasons, or if you frequently find yourself in conflicts with those closest to you, it could be an indication that your behavior is contributing to these fallouts.

Remember that it’s never too late to change and grow. Recognizing these signs is the first step towards becoming a better, more understanding person.

Reflecting on the journey

The complexity of human behavior and personality traits is as fascinating as it is intricate.

One key aspect is the concept of emotional intelligence, which includes self-awareness and empathy. Research indicates that individuals who score higher on emotional intelligence are often perceived as easier to get along with.

If you’ve identified with a majority of the signs listed in this article, don’t lose heart. The fact that you’re aware and willing to reflect on your behavior is an important step towards growth and change.

Remember, we’re all works in progress, continuously learning and evolving. It’s never too late to make a change, to be more understanding, patient, and empathetic.

As renowned psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” This acceptance of oneself, warts and all, is the first step towards becoming a better version of ourselves.

So take a moment today for some introspection. It might just open the door to more harmonious relationships and a happier you.