There’s a real generation gap when it comes to manners and etiquette. Boomers, those born between 1946 and 1964, have certain habits that they hold dear, believing they’re the cornerstone of good behavior.

Younger folks, though? They tend to see these habits as unnecessary, outdated, or even downright odd. It’s safe to say they often roll their eyes at these boomer-beloved mannerisms.

In this article, I’m going to walk you through eight etiquette habits that boomers can’t get enough of while their younger counterparts just can’t help but scoff.

So, buckle up! It’s time for a manners showdown between the generations.

1) Writing thank you notes

Boomers are big on gratitude. And nothing says “thank you” quite like taking the time to put pen to paper.

A handwritten note is the epitome of personal touch for many boomers. They see it as a way to express genuine appreciation and make the recipient feel special.

But younger generations? They often view this practice as a bit over the top. After all, isn’t a quick thank-you text or email just as good?

Some might argue that it’s even better, considering the environmental impact of paper production. But try telling that to a boomer who loves their stationery and stamps.

This clash of perspectives is just one example of how etiquette habits can vary widely between age groups, sparking plenty of eye-rolling along the way.

2) Phone etiquette

I’ll never forget the day my mom scolded me for not answering the home phone by stating my full name. To her, that was just basic phone etiquette.

Boomers, like my mom, tend to have a whole host of rules about phone manners. Answering with a polite greeting, always returning calls promptly, and never interrupting someone else’s call are just a few examples.

But for younger people like me? We’re more likely to let calls go to voicemail or respond with a quick text. And we certainly don’t feel the need to announce ourselves every time we pick up the phone.

Perhaps it’s the shift from landlines to cell phones that has caused this change in perspective. After all, nowadays we usually know who’s calling before we answer. But it’s clear that this is one etiquette habit that can cause some generational friction.

3) Dress codes

Boomers have a reputation for dressing more formally than their younger counterparts. It’s not unusual to see them donning suits and dresses for occasions where millennials and Gen Z would opt for jeans and a t-shirt.

This isn’t just about fashion trends, though. It’s a reflection of the importance that boomers place on showing respect through attire. In their view, dressing up is a way to demonstrate that you value the event and the people involved.

But here’s something you might not know: this etiquette habit could be linked to the fact that boomers grew up during a time when dress codes were much more rigid. They were expected to wear certain types of clothing for different occasions, from church services to family dinners.

Younger generations, however, have grown up in a more casual era. They’ve been encouraged to express their individuality through their clothing choices. So it’s no surprise that they sometimes roll their eyes at the formalities of boomer-style dress codes.

4) Table manners

When it comes to dining, boomers have some strong opinions about what’s acceptable and what’s not. Elbows off the table, napkins in your lap, and never, ever starting to eat before everyone has been served are just a few of the rules they tend to follow.

For boomers, these table manners are a mark of respect for both the food and the company. It’s about making the meal a pleasant experience for everyone involved.

Younger generations, on the other hand, may find these rules a bit stuffy and unnecessary. They’re more focused on the conversation and enjoying their food than worrying about where their elbows are.

It’s not that younger people don’t care about being polite. It’s just that their idea of what constitutes good manners can be quite different from their boomer counterparts.

5) Giving up your seat

Boomers tend to be sticklers for this one — if you’re in a crowded bus or train and you see someone older, pregnant, or with a disability, you should give up your seat.

They see this as a simple act of kindness and respect, a way to show consideration for others who might be having a harder time than you.

But nowadays, younger people might not see this tradition in the same light. With the rise of discussions around equality, they might argue that everyone should have an equal opportunity to a seat, regardless of age or physical condition.

However, no matter where you stand on the issue, it’s undeniable that this is one habit that encapsulates the generational divide on etiquette. And it’s certainly a topic that can tug at the heartstrings, as it’s rooted in our basic human compassion for others.

6) Handwritten letters

I have a box at home, filled with handwritten letters from my grandparents. Each one, penned with care, carries a special memory, a story, or advice that they wanted to share.

Boomers like my grandparents often prefer handwritten letters over digital communication. They believe that taking the time to write a letter shows a level of thoughtfulness and care that can’t be matched by an email or text message.

But for younger people like me, the idea of writing a letter seems almost archaic. With the convenience and speed of digital communication, it’s tempting to view traditional letter-writing as a waste of time.

Yet, every time I read through the letters in that box, I can’t help but appreciate the thought and effort that went into each one. It’s a stark reminder that some boomer etiquette habits might seem outdated but can carry a unique charm of their own.

7) Addressing people formally

“Mr.”, “Mrs.”, “Sir”, “Ma’am” – these are terms of address that boomers often use when talking to others, especially those they don’t know well. For them, it’s a demonstration of respect and politeness, setting a tone of formality and distance that they believe is appropriate in many situations.

Younger generations, however, are more likely to use first names right off the bat, even in professional settings. They see this as a way to break down barriers and create a sense of equality and familiarity.

This shift in communication style can sometimes lead to misunderstandings or feelings of disrespect. It’s one of those etiquette habits where the generational divide is most apparent. But like all habits on this list, it’s a reflection of changing times and evolving social norms.

8) Punctuality

Boomers place a high value on being on time. To them, punctuality is more than just a matter of logistics – it’s a sign of respect. It shows that you value the other person’s time and that you’re organized and reliable.

But younger generations often have a more relaxed attitude towards time. They might show up a few minutes late to a casual get-together without thinking twice about it.

This difference in attitudes can lead to friction, with boomers seeing lateness as rudeness, while younger people might view strict punctuality as inflexible and old-fashioned.

But here’s the thing: no matter what your stance on punctuality is, it all comes down to respect. And that’s something that holds true across all generations.

Final thoughts: It’s all about understanding

The differences in etiquette habits between generations are often a source of amusement, confusion, and sometimes even frustration. But at the heart of these differences lies a wealth of information about our social evolution.

Each generation grows up under distinct societal norms and expectations. Boomers, with their penchant for formality and tradition, were shaped by a post-war era that emphasized order and respect. Meanwhile, younger generations were nurtured in a world that values individuality, equality, and informality.

Understanding these generational etiquette habits is more than just an exercise in patience or tolerance. It’s a fascinating glimpse into the shifting sands of societal values and norms.

So next time you find yourself rolling your eyes at a boomer’s insistence on punctuality or formal attire, take a moment to reflect. Just as they might struggle to understand our casual approach to communication or our reliance on digital technology, we might find it hard to appreciate their adherence to traditional etiquette.

In the end, it’s all about understanding each other better and recognizing that every generation brings its own unique flavor to the grand feast of human interaction.