There’s a stark difference between those who are genuinely happy and those who simply appear to be.

The difference lies in the chase. Those who are truly joyful don’t waste their time pursuing things that don’t contribute to their happiness.

Psychology, in its vast wisdom, provides us with insight into what these non-chase-worthy things are.

And as someone who’s interacted with a multitude of personalities across the globe in my editing work, I can attest that these insights ring true universally.

Through these 7 things, you might uncover the secrets to a happier, more content life.

1) Chasing societal norms

The world keeps spinning and with it, societal norms keep changing. But here’s the thing – genuinely happy people don’t spend their energy chasing these societal norms.

Why, you might ask? Well, they understand that trying to keep up with ever-changing expectations is a recipe for stress, not joy.

In the words of famed psychologist Carl Rogers, “The only person who is educated is the one who has learned how to learn and change.”

This implies that genuine happiness lies in our ability to adapt and grow, rather than rigidly adhering to societal expectations.

So, if you’ve been feeling the pressure of society’s ever-changing norms, take a cue from the genuinely joyful. Don’t waste time chasing them. Instead, focus on your personal growth, and you’ll find that happiness comes naturally.

2) The pursuit of perfection

Here’s a personal anecdote. About a decade ago, I was caught up in the relentless pursuit of perfection.

Whether it was my professional editing work or my personal life, I was constantly striving for that 100% mark, believing it to be the key to my happiness.

But over time, this chase started to take a toll on me. I felt exhausted and, ironically, far from happy.

Psychologist Harriet Braiker once said, “Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.” It dawned on me that my pursuit of perfection was not only futile but also detrimental to my happiness.

I shifted my focus from chasing an elusive ‘perfect’ to embracing growth and learning.

This transformed my perspective, making me realize that genuine happiness lies in acknowledging our imperfections and celebrating our progress.

So if you’re stuck in the perfection trap like I once was, remember: perfection is an illusion. Embrace your fallibility and cherish the journey of growth. That’s where you’ll find your joy.

3) The quest for constant positivity

Ever feel like you’re supposed to be happy all the time? It’s an exhausting and frankly unrealistic expectation.

Life is a mix of good and bad days, highs and lows. And it’s okay not to be okay sometimes. Genuinely happy people know this and don’t chase after constant positivity.

Let’s be honest here. It’s okay to feel down, to have off days. What matters is that we pick ourselves back up, learn from these experiences, and move forward.

Chasing after constant happiness is like trying to hold water in your hands – it’ll just slip through your fingers. Instead, embrace life with all its ups and downs. It’s in this acceptance that you’ll find genuine joy.

4) Living in the future

One common trap many of us fall into is the constant anticipation of future happiness. “I’ll be happy when I get that promotion,” or “I’ll be satisfied when I buy that new car.” Sound familiar?

However, genuinely joyful people don’t waste their time living in the future. They understand the importance of living in the present moment.

A study published found that people reported greater happiness when they lived in the present moment, rather than constantly planning for the future. It showed that a wandering mind often leads to unhappiness.

So, instead of constantly chasing after future goals and milestones, try to live in the now. Embrace the present moment, with all its imperfections. After all, happiness isn’t a destination – it’s a journey.

5) The need for material possessions

I’ll admit it, I’ve been drawn to the allure of material possessions. The latest gadget, the trendiest fashion – they seem to promise happiness. But over time, I’ve realized that these things offer nothing more than temporary pleasure.

Genuinely happy people don’t waste their time chasing after material possessions. They understand that real joy comes from experiences and relationships, not things.

So, if you find yourself yearning for the latest iPhone or a luxury car, take a step back. Ask yourself if these material possessions will truly bring you happiness or if they’re just distractions from what really matters in life.

6) Avoiding discomfort

It might seem counterintuitive, but genuinely joyful people don’t run away from discomfort. Instead, they acknowledge it and face it head on.

They understand that growth often comes from discomfort and thus, they don’t waste their time avoiding it.

Psychologist M. Scott Peck once said, “The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled.

For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.”

It’s a powerful reminder that sometimes, stepping out of our comfort zone is necessary for growth and ultimately, happiness.

So, next time you’re faced with a challenging situation or feeling uncomfortable, don’t shy away. It might just be the stepping stone you need to find your path to genuine joy.

7) Seeking validation

Genuinely happy people don’t chase after validation from others. They know their worth doesn’t hinge on others’ opinions.

Renowned psychologist Albert Ellis once said,  “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” This applies to self-love too. Persist in loving and valuing yourself, irrespective of external validation.

So stop seeking outside approval. Your happiness lies within you, not in the views of others.

Wrapping it up

The journey of genuine happiness isn’t about an endless pursuit. It’s about mindfulness, acceptance, and growth.

We’ve explored the seven things that genuinely happy and joyful people don’t chase after. Now, it’s time for some self-reflection.

Are you spending your precious time and energy chasing after the things that truly matter? Or are you caught up in societal norms, the pursuit of perfection, and the illusion of constant positivity?

Remember, happiness isn’t a destination. It’s a journey, a process. It’s about finding joy in the present moment, cherishing our relationships over material possessions, and facing discomfort head-on.

As you navigate your path toward happiness, keep these insights in mind. Let them guide you toward a more joyful and fulfilling life.

After all, genuine happiness doesn’t come from what we chase but from what we choose to let go of.