7 subtle behaviors of genuinely confident man, according to psychology

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | May 12, 2025, 1:25 pm

Ever heard the saying, “confidence is silent, insecurities are loud”?

Well, there’s a fair bit of truth to it.

Confident men, contrary to popular belief, don’t always need to flex their muscles or boast about their achievements. Instead, their confidence often manifests in more subtle ways. Behaviors that are less about showboating and more about quiet self-assuredness.

But how do you spot these subtle signs of confidence?

There’s quite a bit of psychology behind it, actually.

A genuinely confident man doesn’t need to constantly seek validation or approval from others. Rather, his actions and demeanor speak for themselves. And while some people might mistake this for arrogance or egotism, it’s actually the very opposite.

So buckle up, as we delve into the seven subtle behaviors of genuinely confident men, according to psychology.

This isn’t about creating an alpha male checklist or feeding into stereotypes. It’s about understanding the nuanced ways in which confidence can manifest in a person’s behavior – and how you can adopt these traits to boost your own confidence.

Let’s dive in!

P.S: While this article focuses on men, remember that these behaviors could apply to anyone regardless of gender!

1) They listen more than they speak

Ever noticed how some people just can’t stop talking about themselves?

Well, genuinely confident men don’t feel the need to constantly dominate the conversation. Instead, they often listen more than they speak.

Why is that?

The psychology behind it is simple. Confident men are comfortable in their own skin and secure in their abilities. They don’t feel the need to constantly prove themselves to others. Instead, they’re genuinely interested in learning about others and gaining new perspectives.

In fact, a study by the Harvard Business Review found that good listeners make for better leaders. This is because listening helps build stronger relationships and fosters better understanding.

So, if you’re looking to boost your confidence, consider improving your listening skills. Not only will it make you appear more confident, but it’ll also help you build stronger relationships and grow as a person.

2) They’re not afraid to show vulnerability

Now this is a trait that took me a while to understand.

Confident men, in my experience, aren’t afraid to show their vulnerability. They don’t see it as a weakness, but rather as a strength.

I remember a time when I was at a networking event with a good friend of mine, Jake. He’s one of the most confident people I know. At one point during the evening, he was sharing a story about a recent project he’d been working on that had failed miserably.

Instead of sugarcoating it or trying to shift the blame, Jake owned up to his mistakes. He spoke honestly about what went wrong and what he learned from the experience.

It was refreshing.

In that moment, Jake wasn’t just confident, he was authentic and real. And guess what? People respected him even more for it.

Showing vulnerability is a sign of emotional intelligence – an attribute often found in genuinely confident men. They understand that no one is perfect and that everyone has their struggles.

By being open and honest about their own, they foster deeper connections with those around them.

3) They’re comfortable with silence

I used to be that person who would fill every silence with mindless chatter. I thought if I wasn’t saying something, anything, then people would lose interest.

But let me tell you about my friend, Sam.

Sam was the kind of guy who could sit in silence and make it feel like the most natural thing in the world. He never felt the need to fill every conversation gap with words. And he certainly wasn’t uncomfortable with a little quiet.

What I realized after observing Sam was that he was incredibly confident in himself.

Being comfortable with silence is a sign of self-assuredness — it shows that you don’t feel the need to constantly validate your existence through words. Instead, you’re comfortable just being present in the moment.

Silence doesn’t scare confident people because they know it’s not an indication of disinterest or rejection. It’s just a pause, a moment of reflection, a part of life.

So next time you find yourself in a silent situation, don’t rush to fill it. Embrace it. You might be surprised at how liberating it feels to just…be.

4) They give genuine compliments

There’s something about a genuine compliment that can truly brighten up someone’s day. And confident men understand this power.

They’re not stingy with their praise, nor do they use compliments as a manipulative tool. Instead, they give them freely and sincerely, often focusing on people’s strengths and achievements.

Why? Because confident men are secure in their own self-worth. They don’t feel threatened by other people’s success. On the contrary, they celebrate it.

You see, giving compliments is a reflection of one’s own self-esteem. It shows that you’re comfortable enough in your own abilities to recognize and appreciate the abilities of others.

Next time you have the opportunity to give a compliment, don’t hold back. Not only will it make the other person feel good, but it will also boost your own confidence. Just remember to keep it real and sincere.

5) They’re not afraid to say “I don’t know”

In an era where information is at our fingertips, admitting you don’t know something can feel like a daunting task. But confident men are not afraid of these three words: “I don’t know.”

Here’s something to consider.

In a study conducted by the American Psychological Association, it was found that individuals who overestimate their knowledge are often seen as less competent. On the other hand, those who admit their lack of knowledge are viewed as more reliable and trustworthy.

Confident men understand this. They’re secure in their intelligence and skills, but they also acknowledge that they don’t have all the answers. And they’re okay with that.

In fact, they see it as an opportunity to learn and grow. After all, the first step to gaining knowledge is admitting you don’t already have it. It shows that you’re open-minded and willing to learn – traits that are deeply respected in both personal and professional settings.

6) They’re quick to lend a hand

I’ll never forget the day when I was struggling to change a flat tire on the side of the road. It was raining, and I was all alone.

Then, out of nowhere, a man pulled over and offered to help. He didn’t have to – he could’ve easily driven past like so many others. But he took the time out of his day to lend a hand.

That’s confidence.

Confident men are often quick to help others, not because they want something in return, but because they genuinely care.

Psychology tells us that being kind and helpful boosts our self-esteem and increases our sense of self-worth. It also fosters positive relationships with others, further enhancing our confidence.

So don’t be afraid to lend a hand when someone is in need. It’s not just about being a good Samaritan – it’s about being a confident one.

7) They acknowledge their mistakes

This is perhaps the most important trait of genuinely confident men – they’re not afraid to admit when they’re wrong.

It’s easy to pass the blame or make excuses when things go awry. But it takes real confidence to own up to your mistakes and take responsibility for your actions.

Why is this so crucial?

Because acknowledging our mistakes is a vital part of personal growth and self-improvement. It shows that we value learning and development over maintaining a flawless front.

The next time you make a mistake, don’t shy away from it. Acknowledge it, learn from it, and use it as a stepping stone towards becoming a better, more confident version of yourself.

Final thoughts

If you’ve been nodding along as you read these signs, it’s likely you already possess some of the subtle behaviors of genuinely confident men.

That’s great news!

But remember, confidence is not a destination, it’s a journey. It’s about continual growth, understanding, and self-improvement.

Start by recognizing these behaviors in yourself. Pay attention to how you react in different situations. Are you comfortable with silence? Do you give genuine compliments? Are you quick to admit your mistakes?

These small self-awareness exercises can do wonders for your confidence. They help you understand where you’re already strong and where there’s room for improvement.

As the famous psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

Embrace who you are, warts and all. Remember, it’s not about being perfect, it’s about being authentically you.

And that, my friend, is the true mark of confidence.