7 scenarios in life where a person’s true character is revealed, according to psychology

Life can be a tricky business. We all want to believe we’re good judges of character, but how many times have we been wrong?
Hi, I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder of Hack Spirit and a self-professed psychology enthusiast.
Just a few years ago, I was completely misguided. I thought I knew people well, only to be surprised again and again by their actions when the chips were down.
Throughout my journey in the world of psychology, I’ve learned that people’s true colors often come out in certain situations.
But what if we could predict these moments? Wouldn’t it make life a whole lot easier?
In this article, I’m going to share 7 scenarios, backed by psychological studies, where a person’s true character is often revealed. These insights have helped me immensely, and I hope they do the same for you. Let’s dive in.
1) In moments of crisis
Psychology has often shown that it’s during a crisis when a person’s true character is most clearly revealed.
I’ll be honest, this was something that took me by surprise. I had always thought that people are at their best in times of calm and stability, but life had other lessons in store for me.
During a crisis, whether it’s a personal tragedy or a global pandemic, all pretenses fall away. The pressure mounts and suddenly, there’s no hiding from who we truly are.
It can be a time of tremendous growth or a moment of stark revelation. But invariably, it’s during these challenging times that the mask slips and the true self emerges.
There’s an old adage that goes, “Adversity doesn’t build character, it reveals it.” And from my own experiences and observations, I’ve found this to be profoundly true.
So next time you find yourself or someone else in the midst of a crisis, pay close attention. It could be a window into the soul revealing aspects of character you might never have seen in more placid times.
2) When faced with moral dilemmas
I can still remember a moment in my past that candidly revealed a lot about my character. I was faced with a moral dilemma: To stand up for a friend being unjustly targeted or to stay silent and keep myself out of the line of fire.
According to psychology, it’s these moral crossroads that truly test and reveal our character.
The renowned psychologist Lawrence Kohlberg once said: “Moral development is the process through which individuals develop proper attitudes and behaviors toward other people in society, based on social and cultural norms, rules, and laws.”
In that moment of truth, I had to dig deep and decide who I was. Was I someone who stood by the sidelines or someone who stepped up?
I chose to stand up, even though it was uncomfortable and risky. That decision not only revealed my character to others, but also to myself.
So the next time you’re faced with a moral dilemma, remember it’s not just about the immediate situation. It’s an opportunity to discover and define your true character.
3) When given power
Power dynamics can be tricky, and they reveal a lot about a person’s character. I once found myself in a position of authority at an old job, and it was a learning experience to say the least.
Suddenly, I was the one making decisions and setting the rules. It was easy to get carried away, to let the power go to my head.
But I soon realized that how I conducted myself in this role said more about me than any title ever could.
As Abraham Lincoln wisely said, “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power.”
I could have chosen to be domineering and strict, but that didn’t align with who I wanted to be. Instead, I chose to lead with empathy and understanding.
It wasn’t always easy, but it was a true test of my character and values.
In positions of power, your true character isn’t hidden behind a mask of subordination or fear. It’s out there for everyone to see. And trust me, people are watching.
4) When dealing with money
Money, whether it’s the lack of it, or an abundance, can reveal aspects of our character that we may not even be aware of.
I remember when I got my first big paycheck. It was tempting to splurge it all on frivolous things, to live in the moment. But the way I chose to handle that money revealed a lot about my priorities and values.
On the other hand, those who spent more on personal items or expenses were seen as more extroverted.
The way we handle our finances, it turns out, provides a window into our attitudes, priorities, and quite possibly our character.
So next time you’re about to make a financial decision, big or small, take a moment to reflect. How you choose to spend your money could say more about you than you think.
5) When they believe no one is watching
There’s a saying that goes, “Character is what you do when no one is watching.” I’ve found this to be particularly true in my own life.
I remember a time when I found a lost wallet full of cash on a nearly deserted street. There was no one around, and it would have been easy to pocket the money with no consequences.
But what we do when we think nobody will find out, in those quiet, unobserved moments, speaks volumes about our character.
In that moment, I chose to track down the owner of the wallet and return it. Not because I wanted praise or recognition, but because it felt like the right thing to do.
Your actions in these unobserved moments are a raw, unfiltered reflection of your character. So, pay attention to what you do when you think no one is watching. It might reveal more about your character than you realize.
6) How they treat those who can do nothing for them
In my life, I’ve often noticed that you can tell a lot about a person by how they treat those who can’t do anything for them in return.
I recall a time when I was at a restaurant with a friend who was quite rude to the waiter. It struck me that this person, who was generally charming and friendly, could be so dismissive to someone who couldn’t offer them anything beyond their immediate service.
As the famous psychologist Carl Jung once said, “You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.”
This experience reminded me of Jung’s words and made me reflect on my own actions. It’s easy to be kind and polite to those who can benefit us in some way.
But showing respect and empathy to everyone, regardless of what they can do for us, is a true mark of character.
So, pay attention not just to how people treat their equals, but also how they treat those from whom they have nothing to gain.
7. How they handle success
Now, this may seem counterintuitive, but I’ve come to realize that success can reveal just as much about a person’s character as failure does.
I once landed a big promotion at work, something I’d been working towards for years. While it was a time of celebration, it was also a revealing period in my life.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of letting success inflate your ego. You might begin to believe you’re superior to others or let the success define your self-worth.
However, handling success with humility and grace is a true testament to character.
As I navigated my new role, I had to remind myself that success is not an excuse for arrogance or complacency. I chose to use my success as a platform to lift others up and to continue learning and growing.
So the next time you find yourself basking in the glow of a win, take a moment to reflect on how you’re handling it. Remember to stay humble, keep learning, and use your success for good. It’s a practical way to ensure your character remains intact even when you’re on top of the world.
Conclusion
Understanding these scenarios and how they reveal our true character can be a powerful tool for personal growth. But remember, character isn’t set in stone. It’s something that we continuously shape and evolve throughout our lives.
Take these moments as opportunities to reflect, learn and grow. If you don’t like what you see, it’s never too late to change.
As you navigate through life, remember the words of Helen Keller: “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”
Keep questioning, keep learning and most importantly, keep growing. Your character is your legacy – make it one you’re proud of.
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