7 phrases a woman will use when she’s quietly struggling through life, says psychology

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | May 15, 2025, 11:44 am

We all have our fair share of personal battles, don’t we?

As a woman, you might often find yourself in a whirlwind of emotions, trying to juggle multiple roles – a mother, a wife, a career woman – all at once. And sometimes, it might just feel like too much.

But here’s the catch.

Women are particularly good at concealing their struggles – so good that you might not even notice when they are silently fighting their own battles. So, how do you really know when a woman is quietly struggling through life?

Well, according to psychology, there are seven phrases that a woman may use when she’s facing challenges.

Isn’t it fascinating how language can serve as a window to our internal struggles? This is the beauty of human psychology and communication intertwined – and boy do they tell an intriguing story!

Prepare yourself to delve into the world of words and emotions as we unravel these seven phrases that hold deeper meanings than what meets the eye.

Through this journey, you will not only become more empathetic but also possibly aid someone silently struggling, merely by understanding the unspoken words behind their spoken phrases.

1) “I’m fine, don’t worry about me”

Let’s kick things off with a phrase we’ve all heard (and probably used) countless times: “I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”

But here’s a little secret.

When a woman repeatedly insists she’s ‘fine’ and urges you not to worry, it might be a subtle cry for help.

This could be her way of trying to convince herself that everything is okay, even when it’s not. It’s a brave face she puts up, a form of self-preservation.

It’s her attempt to avoid burdening others with her problems, while simultaneously hoping someone might see past the facade.

The next time you hear this phrase, don’t just take it at face value. A gentle nudge or an open-ended question might just open the door for her to share her struggles.

2) “I’m just tired”

This one hits close to home.

I remember this one time, my best friend kept using this phrase – “I’m just tired.” I thought she was not getting enough sleep, juggling her job and two rowdy toddlers.

But the truth was far from it.

The repetitive use of “I’m just tired” was not about physical exhaustion. It was a mask for the emotional and mental fatigue she was battling with each day.

In retrospect, I realize that her tiredness was a manifestation of her struggle with postpartum depression and the chaos of becoming a new parent all over again.

This phrase, often thrown around casually, might be a woman’s way of conveying her internal struggle without explicitly stating it. She’s expressing that she’s mentally or emotionally drained, even when she looks physically fit.

So, if you know a woman who often says she’s tired, it might be worth checking in on her. Because sometimes, “I’m just tired” can be a silent plea for understanding and support.

3) “Maybe it’s just me”

“Maybe it’s just me.” Doesn’t that sound familiar?

This phrase can be a hidden cry echoing from the depths of self-doubt and insecurity. When a woman uses this phrase, she might be struggling with an internal battle of feeling isolated or misunderstood.

It’s like standing in a room full of people, yet feeling utterly alone. Or having a sea of thoughts, yet feeling like no one would understand.

I’ve been there. It feels like you’re on the outside looking in, questioning your thoughts, your feelings, even your worth. It’s a struggle that often goes unnoticed because it’s easier to blame oneself than to admit that you’re going through a tough time.

When you hear a woman say “maybe it’s just me,” take a moment. Offer a listening ear or a comforting word. You might just be the lifeline she needs in her sea of self-doubt.

4) “It doesn’t matter”

Ever heard the phrase, “It doesn’t matter”?

When a woman utters this phrase, she might be struggling with feelings of insignificance or frustration.

You see, it’s a dismissive phrase, often used to subtly communicate that her feelings or needs are not being acknowledged or understood. It can be a way for her to withdraw from a situation that she finds overwhelming or hurtful.

On the surface, it seems like a simple statement of indifference, but beneath it lies a world of unexpressed emotions and unmet needs.

So, if you notice a woman frequently stating, “It doesn’t matter,” it may be time to pause and pay attention. A little empathy and understanding could go a long way in helping her navigate through her unspoken struggles.

5) “I should be able to handle this”

Now, here’s a phrase that’s quite common yet often overlooked – “I should be able to handle this.”

According to psychology, this is known as ‘should’ thinking and it’s a cognitive distortion that can lead to feelings of guilt or inadequacy.

When a woman says this phrase, she might be dealing with an internal pressure to meet certain standards or expectations – whether they are self-imposed or societal.

It can stem from a belief that she needs to be strong, independent, or even perfect.

This phrase can be an indication of her silently struggling with self-doubt, stress or anxiety. It’s her way of expressing that she feels overwhelmed yet believes she should be able to cope with it all.

When you hear “I should be able to handle this,” remember, it might be her way of saying that she’s feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders. A small gesture of reassurance can make a big difference in making her feel supported and understood.

6) “I don’t want to be a burden”

“I don’t want to be a burden.” This phrase is heart-wrenching, isn’t it?

When a woman says this, she might be silently struggling with feelings of guilt or unworthiness. She might worry that her problems will inconvenience others or make them uncomfortable.

The fear of being a ‘burden’ can keep her from reaching out for help, even when she’s drowning in her own troubles. It’s her own kind-hearted nature not wanting to impose on others, yet it’s this very nature that can also add to her struggle.

So, the next time you hear a woman say “I don’t want to be a burden,” remind her that it’s okay to lean on others. That asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, but of strength. After all, we all need a helping hand once in a while, don’t we?

7) “I just need some time alone”

The statement “I just need some time alone” is often a woman’s discreet cry for help.

When she uses this phrase, she might be grappling with overwhelming emotions or stressors that she needs to process privately. It could be her way of saying that she’s struggling internally and needs some space to gather her thoughts.

Remember, seeking solitude is not always about wanting to be lonely. Sometimes, it’s about needing a safe space to heal, to cry, or simply to breathe.

So, if you hear “I just need some time alone,” respect her need for space but remind her that you’re there for her when she’s ready to reconnect. Because sometimes, knowing that someone cares can be the beacon of hope in her stormy sea of struggles.

The takeaway

Unraveling the phrases women use when they’re quietly struggling can be eye-opening, can’t it?

If these phrases strike a chord with you or remind you of someone you know, remember – understanding is the first step towards change.

Psychology suggests that awareness and empathy can make a world of difference. Noticing these subtle signs can provide a lifeline for someone silently battling their struggles.

Keep in mind, everyone’s journey is unique. If a woman in your life – or even you – often uses these phrases, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s on the brink of despair. But it could signify she’s facing challenges she’s yet to voice out loud.

So, lend an ear, offer a comforting word, or simply remind her (or yourself) that it’s okay not to be okay. And most importantly, that she’s not alone in her battle.

After all, we’re all human, beautifully flawed and perfectly imperfect.

As we navigate through life’s ebbs and flows, let’s remember to extend the same compassion and patience we offer others to ourselves too. Because sometimes, the person who needs our understanding the most is the one staring back at us in the mirror.