People who were criticized too much as a child typically develop these 7 traits later in life, says psychology

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | January 23, 2025, 9:44 pm

Childhood patterns have a lasting impact on our personalities and behaviors, especially when they involve criticism. If you’ve experienced this, you’re likely to have developed certain traits in response to this upbringing. 

The process of identifying these traits can be enlightening. It’s a journey of understanding one’s self, offering insight into why we behave the way we do.

In the following listicle, we will delve into these seven traits that often stem from a critical upbringing. Recognizing them can be a crucial step towards self-improvement and healing.

But remember, these traits do not define you. They are simply outcomes of past experiences, and with awareness and effort, they can be transformed.

Now, let’s examine these traits more closely to help you understand your personal growth journey better.

1) Overly self-critical

One common trait developed by those who were criticized too much as children is being overly self-critical. In an attempt to meet the high standards set for them in their formative years, such individuals often become their own harshest critic.

They may have an intense fear of making mistakes and could be prone to anxiety and perfectionism.

This self-criticism extends beyond just their actions; it can also manifest in negative self-talk and a pervasive feeling of inadequacy, regardless of their achievements.

The constant internal dialogue of “I’m not good enough” or “I should have done better” is a typical indicator of this trait.

2) Hypersensitivity to criticism

Growing up with a lot of criticism can result in a hypersensitivity to any form of critique later in life. This is because the individual may perceive criticism as an attack on their self-worth, rather than constructive feedback.

Even mild critique can lead to an intense emotional response, including feelings of anger, sadness, or anxiety.

This hypersensitivity might also cause avoidance of situations where criticism may occur. It can hinder personal growth and hold back professional advancement, as constructive feedback is often an essential part of improvement and progression.

3) Difficulty trusting others

Experiencing excessive criticism in childhood can lead to trust issues in adulthood.

The individual may find it hard to believe in the sincerity of others, often suspecting ulterior motives or anticipating betrayal. The root of this mistrust typically stems from a fear of being judged or criticized.

This difficulty with trust can impact relationships, creating barriers to forming deep, meaningful connections with others. It can also result in a defensive attitude, as the person tries to protect themselves from perceived harm.

4) Tendency for people-pleasing behavior

Another trait often developed by those who were excessively criticized in childhood is people-pleasing behavior. This stems from a deep-seated desire to avoid criticism and gain approval from others.

As a result, such individuals may find it hard to assert their own needs and preferences, often putting others’ needs before their own.

This people-pleasing behavior can lead to a loss of personal identity and feeling unfulfilled, as the person constantly prioritizes pleasing others over addressing their own desires and needs.

It can also result in difficulty saying ‘no’, leading to overcommitment and stress.

5) Perfectionism

Perfectionism is another trait often developed by those who were criticized excessively during their childhood. Striving for perfection becomes a defense mechanism to avoid criticism and gain approval.

They may set impossibly high standards for themselves, leading to burnout, anxiety, and even depression when these standards are not met.

This relentless pursuit of perfection can also lead to procrastination, as the fear of failure or not meeting the high standards can result in avoiding tasks altogether.

6) Difficulty expressing emotions

Excessive criticism in childhood can lead to difficulty in expressing emotions in adulthood.

Individuals who were constantly criticized may have learned to suppress their emotions to avoid further criticism or punishment. They may struggle to identify and express their feelings, often opting for a more stoic exterior.

This can lead to a disconnect with their own emotional world and hinder the formation of emotionally intimate relationships with others. It may also result in bottled-up emotions, leading to outbursts or emotional numbness.

7) Low self-esteem

The last trait we’re highlighting that often develops in individuals who were excessively criticized as children is low self-esteem.

Constant criticism can erode a child’s sense of self-worth, leading to an adulthood marked by feelings of inadequacy and inferiority.

People with low self-esteem often doubt their abilities and worth, regardless of their accomplishments. This can limit their potential, as they may avoid taking risks or pursuing opportunities due to fear of failure or further criticism.

While understanding these traits is essential, it’s also crucial to know that they can be transformed.

Transforming these traits

Understanding these traits is the first step towards transformation. If you recognize these traits in yourself, it’s important to remember that they are not definitive.

They are simply outcomes of past experiences, and with awareness, self-compassion, and effort, they can be transformed.

Therapy can be an invaluable tool in this process. A skilled therapist can provide a safe space to explore these traits and their roots in your childhood experiences.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is particularly effective in challenging negative thought patterns and developing healthier coping mechanisms.

Self-care also plays a crucial role in this journey. Practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and journaling can help cultivate self-awareness and self-compassion. Physical exercise and a balanced diet can also contribute to overall mental wellbeing.

Remember, it’s not about erasing these traits but transforming them into strength. Overcoming excessive self-criticism can lead to self-compassion, transforming hypersensitivity to criticism into resilience, and turning low self-esteem into self-love and acceptance.

This journey might not be easy, but it’s certainly worthwhile. Remember, you are more than the criticism you received as a child.

You have the power to redefine your worth and shape your life in the way you desire.