People who are insufferable on social media but likable in real life usually display these 7 habits, according to psychology

There’s a peculiar paradox in the realm of social media.
Have you ever noticed how some folks are absolute nightmares online, but entirely different – and surprisingly likable – in person?
It’s a fascinating aspect of human behavior that psychology might have some answers for.
Each one of us knows someone who fits this mold.
They might be a constant complainer on Facebook, or an Instagram celebrity with an ego bigger than their follower count, yet in real life, they’re entirely different – charming, funny, or even humble.
It’s a strange phenomenon that leaves us scratching our heads.
What is it that makes them so irritating online yet so pleasant offline?
According to psychologists, people who display this Jekyll and Hyde transformation usually exhibit seven specific habits.
In this article, we’re going to dive into what those are and why they create such a stark contrast between our digital and physical interactions.
Buckle up, reader – it’s time for a journey into the mind of your most annoying Facebook friend who is actually quite nice when you grab a coffee together!
1) Over-sharing life’s mundane moments
We all have that one friend whose life seems like an open book on social media.
They’re the ones who document every minor detail, from their morning cup of coffee to the traffic they’re stuck in.
Yet in real life, they are often engaging conversationalists who focus more on listening than talking about themselves.
It’s an intriguing contradiction that leaves many of us puzzled.
So why the disparity?
Well, psychology has an answer. Carl Rogers, a renowned psychologist once said, “What is most personal is most universal.”
This quote perfectly encapsulates the behavior of these individuals.
They believe that by sharing their everyday experiences, they are creating a bond with their audience, making their experiences relatable to others.
However, this constant over-sharing online can come off as self-absorbed and annoying.
In person though, this desire to connect manifests in a more endearing way – they are attentive and show a genuine interest in other’s lives, making them quite likable.
Next time you roll your eyes at their exhaustive Instagram story, remember they’re probably just trying to connect on a deeper level!
2) The constant complainer
Who doesn’t know a perpetual complainer on social media?
They’re the ones who always have something to gripe about – from the weather to politics to their disappointing lunch.
I have a friend, let’s call her Jane. Jane’s online persona is one of constant dissatisfaction.
Whether it’s the long queue at the grocery store or her misbehaving pet, her Facebook feed is a litany of complaints.
But here’s the surprise – in person, Jane is one of the most positive people I know.
Sounds confusing? Well, it might have roots in psychology.
Sigmund Freud once said, “Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.”
This could explain why Jane and others vent so much online. It’s an outlet for their frustrations, a way to keep their real-life interactions lighter and more pleasant.
While their constant complaints might be irksome online, in person they’re often quite positive and cheerful – making them much more likable in real life.
3) The social media warrior
Ever wondered why some people are always ready for a debate or argument on social media, but are peace-loving and non-confrontational in real life?
I’ve noticed this trait among many acquaintances.
They’re quick to jump into any heated discussion online, eager to share their opinions on everything from climate change to celebrity gossip.
Yet in person, they avoid conflict and are generally agreeable.
This might seem contradictory, but it actually makes sense when you think about it.
Online platforms provide a certain level of anonymity and distance that emboldens people to voice their opinions more assertively than they would face-to-face.
Renowned psychologist Abraham Maslow once said, “In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety.”
This quote can be applied here. Online, these individuals step forward into growth, embracing the opportunity to express themselves freely.
In real life, they often step back into safety, avoiding confrontation for the sake of harmony.
Their bold online persona doesn’t necessarily mirror their real-life temperament. It’s just another aspect of their complex personality!
4) The attention seeker
We all know someone who seems to crave attention on social media.
They post provocative photos, share controversial opinions, or constantly update their status.
Individuals who crave validation and attention are more likely to be heavy users of social media.
But here’s another twist. In real life, these attention-seekers are often quite likable.
They’re usually charismatic, lively, and bring a lot of energy to social gatherings.
Their need for validation translates into being great entertainers and storytellers in person.
As much as their constant need for likes can be insufferable online, their vivacious personalities often make them popular in real life.
It’s a classic case of two sides of the same coin!
5) The unrealistic perfectionist
We’ve all seen those social media profiles that seem too perfect to be true – flawless selfies, exotic vacations, and gourmet meals.
These individuals always appear to be living their best life online.
I have an old college friend whose Instagram profile looks like a luxury lifestyle magazine. It’s a constant stream of perfect moments.
But when we catch up over coffee, she’s the first to admit that her life isn’t as perfect as it seems online.
Albert Ellis, a significant figure in psychology, once said, “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.”
In this context, it could mean that the art of being likable lies in the persistence of being real.
These folks often project an image of perfection online.
But in offline interactions, they’re usually honest about their realities, making them more relatable and likable.
Their recognition of their own imperfections makes them human and approachable.
So, while the unrealistic perfection they present online can be off-putting, their authenticity in real life is what makes them truly endearing.
6) The silent observer
Here’s an interesting paradox: some of the most likable people in real life are often the most quiet on social media.
They rarely post, seldom comment, but they’re always there, silently observing.
Contrary to what you might think, these folks are not disinterested or aloof.
They’re simply more comfortable observing than participating in the online chatter.
This can sometimes make them seem distant or detached on social media.
But in real life, they are often quite personable and engaging.
Their observant nature makes them excellent listeners, empathetic friends, and insightful conversation partners.
Famed psychologist Carl Jung once said, “The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.”
This quote fits perfectly here. The silent observers have found their comfortable fit – they are spectators online but active participants offline.
While their silence may seem strange online, it’s this very trait that makes them more likable in the real world.
7) The over-analyzer
Finally, we have the over-analyzers. They’re the ones who dissect every post, every comment, every like.
Their social media presence is characterized by thoughtful, often lengthy comments or posts.
Famous psychologist Daniel Kahneman once said, “Nothing in life is as important as you think it is while you are thinking about it.”
This quote speaks volumes about the over-analyzers. They give weight to every detail online.
Off the screen, however, these individuals are often incredibly likable.
Their analytical nature translates into deep conversations and a unique perspective on life that can be truly refreshing.
While their propensity to overthink can be exhausting online, it’s what makes them engaging and likable in person.
Wrapping up
The realm of social media is a fascinating playground of human behavior. It’s a mirror into our personalities, albeit a somewhat distorted one.
It allows us to project a version of ourselves that might not always align with who we are in the real world.
The individuals we’ve talked about – the over-sharers, complainers, warriors, attention seekers, perfectionists, silent observers, and over-analyzers – they all have their unique quirks.
These traits may make them insufferable on social media, but they’re often the very same traits that make them so likable in person.
In the end, it’s essential to remember that people are more than just their online personas.
The next time you find yourself getting frustrated with someone’s social media behavior, take a moment to consider what they might be like offline.
You might be pleasantly surprised.
After all, aren’t we all a little bit insufferable online sometimes?