If you want your child to think you’re a good person as they get older, say goodbye to these 8 behaviors

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | April 18, 2025, 2:23 am

If your kid throws a tantrum, you know they’re upset. If they give you a hug, you know they’re happy.

Ah, the simplicity of parenthood.

But just like that, things can get complicated. As they grow older, their perception of you evolves and becomes more nuanced.

Want to ensure your child thinks highly of you as they mature? It’s time to bid adieu to these 8 behaviors.

Some parents find it easier than others – often because they’ve managed to ditch these traits early on.

That’s the gist of today’s topic, folks. Let’s dive in and see if we can make parenting a tad less complicated for all of us.

1) Avoiding difficult conversations

Growing up is tough. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions, challenges, and life lessons.

As a parent, you’re their guiding light in this tumultuous journey. But what happens when you constantly avoid the hard talks?

You might think you’re protecting them, but in reality, you’re creating a chasm of misunderstanding.

Children are more perceptive than we give them credit for. They can sense when something’s not quite right.

Whether it’s about school troubles, personal growth, or the harsh realities of the world – don’t shy away from these conversations. They may be tough, but they’re crucial.

The avoidance game might seem easier in the short term, but down the line, your child may perceive it as insincerity or lack of concern.

In short: face the music. It’s better to tackle issues head-on and show your child that you’re there for them through thick and thin.

Pretty important, don’t you think?

2) Over-reacting to mistakes

We all make mistakes. They’re the stepping stones to growth. But how we react to our children’s mistakes? That’s the real game-changer.

I still remember when my daughter came home from school, her face ashen. She’d forgotten her science project at home and got a zero.

Now, it would’ve been easy to get upset, to lecture her on responsibility. But I took a deep breath and chose a different path.

I kneeled down to her level, looked her in the eyes, and told her it was okay.

We all forget things sometimes – even adults. I promised we’d work on a system together to help her remember important stuff.

Her relief was palpable.

Over-reacting to mistakes can lead your child to believe that you’re an unforgiving person. Instead, use these moments as learning opportunities.

Show them that it’s okay to mess up and that the important thing is how we learn from our mistakes.

Trust me, your child will appreciate you for it in the long run.

3) Being too critical

In the pursuit of wanting the best for our children, we sometimes risk turning into harsh critics.

We may think we’re pushing them towards greatness, but too much criticism can have the opposite effect.

Did you know that studies have shown that children who are overly criticized are more likely to develop depression and anxiety?

They can also struggle with self-esteem and may even become overly critical of themselves and others.

Striking a balance is key. Encourage their efforts, celebrate their victories, and when it comes to their mistakes or shortcomings – guide them with kindness and understanding.

Remember, your words carry immense weight in your child’s world. Use them wisely.

4) Ignoring your own flaws

As parents, we often want to appear as superheroes in front of our children. We hide our flaws and only show our best selves. But here’s the thing: You’re a human, and it’s okay to not be perfect.

Admitting your own mistakes or acknowledging your weaknesses in front of your child can be incredibly powerful. It shows them that it’s okay to have flaws and to make mistakes.

By doing this, you’re teaching them to be self-aware and humble – two traits that are invaluable in life.

So next time you stumble, don’t just brush it off. Let your child see it, and more importantly, let them see how you handle it with grace. It’s a practical lesson they won’t forget.

5) Being too busy

I remember the days when I’d get so caught up in work, chores, and other responsibilities that I’d forget to take out time for my kids.

It wasn’t until my son asked me why I was always too busy to play with him that I realized the mistake I was making.

Being too busy for your child sends a message that they’re not important enough to deserve your time. And trust me, that’s not a message you want to send.

I started making changes. Small things like getting up an hour earlier to have breakfast with them or setting aside time each evening to just sit with them and talk about their day. It made a world of difference.

Remember, your time is one of the greatest gifts you can give your child. And it’s these moments they’ll cherish and remember when they grow older.

6) Always being the problem solver

As parents, it’s in our nature to want to fix everything for our children. But being their constant problem solver may not be the best approach.

Sure, it’s easy to step in and sort things out whenever they face a hurdle. But doing this can rob them of the opportunity to develop their own problem-solving skills.

Instead of always offering a solution, try guiding them to find their own answers.

Ask them what they think they should do, or how they can handle the situation. You might be surprised at their resilience and creativity.

Teaching them to tackle their own issues not only empowers them but also gives them a sense of accomplishment and boosts their confidence.

7) Overprotecting them

It’s a parent’s natural instinct to protect their children. But there’s a fine line between protection and overprotection.

Overprotecting children can make them feel as though they are incapable of handling life’s challenges on their own.

It can stifle their natural curiosity and hinder their ability to develop important life skills.

Instead of creating a bubble around them, equip them with the knowledge and tools they need to navigate the world safely.

Teach them about right and wrong, how to stand up for themselves, and the importance of being mindful of their surroundings.

In essence, prepare them for the world instead of hiding the world from them.

8) Failing to show unconditional love

This is, perhaps, the most crucial point of all.

Children need to feel loved unconditionally by their parents. It’s the foundation of their self-esteem, their sense of security, and their understanding of what love should feel like.

Show your love consistently, not just when they’ve done something worthy of praise or when they’re behaving well. Even during tough times or when they’ve made a mistake, let them know that your love for them remains constant.

Unconditional love doesn’t mean you don’t discipline them or allow unacceptable behavior.

It means you love them for who they are – their strengths, their flaws, their quirks – everything that makes them unique.

This is the kind of love that fosters healthy emotional growth in children and leaves a lasting positive impact on their perception of you as a parent.

Final thoughts

If you’ve made it this far, I hope you’ve realized that being a good person in your child’s eyes is not about being perfect.

It’s about being human – acknowledging your flaws, learning from mistakes, and most importantly, showing your child unconditional love.

Remember, it’s not just about what we say to our children, but how we behave around them that shapes their perception of us. And that perception, in turn, influences their own behavior and personality.

In the words of James Baldwin, “Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.” So let’s be the kind of people we want our children to become.

With these 8 points in mind, take a moment to reflect on your own behavior. Are there things you need to change?

If so, don’t be too hard on yourself. It’s never too late to start making adjustments for the better.

In the grand scheme of things, it’s not just about being seen as a good person by your child. It’s about genuinely striving to be one – for their sake and yours.