If you want to get on somebody’s good side almost immediately, say goodbye to these habits

Being likable can often feel like a Herculean task.
You try to be friendly, you put in the effort to be helpful, but somehow, you’re just not clicking with certain people.
And it’s not always about grand gestures or major personality overhauls.
Sometimes, it’s those pesky little habits that we hardly notice about ourselves that can be the biggest roadblocks.
Here’s how to identify those subtle behaviors that might be keeping you from hitting it off with someone from the get-go.
This is your guide to understanding the habits you need to bid adieu to if you want to get on somebody’s good side almost immediately.
1) Dominating the conversation
Building rapport with someone almost immediately requires a delicate balance in conversation.
We all have our moments when we get carried away, especially when we are passionate about something.
But here’s the thing: conversations are a two-way street.
If you’re always the one doing the talking, leaving no room for the other person to express their thoughts, it can be off-putting.
It’s not just about what you say, but how much you’re willing to listen as well.
To get on someone’s good side right off the bat, learn to take a step back and give them the floor.
This isn’t about silencing yourself; it’s about creating an environment where both parties feel heard and valued.
Let go of the habit of dominating conversations if you want to make a positive impression quickly.
2) Not showing genuine interest
Now that you’ve mastered the art of not dominating conversations, there’s another habit to address: not showing genuine interest in the other person.
We’ve all been there.
I remember this one time I was at a networking event, and I got into a conversation with a fellow attendee.
While he was talking about his work and experiences, I found myself nodding along, but my mind was elsewhere, thinking about what I would say next.
And guess what? It showed.
The guy picked up on my lack of enthusiasm and soon enough, our conversation fizzled out.
That was an eye-opener for me.
Just being present in a conversation isn’t enough; you need to show authentic interest in what the other person is saying.
Ask relevant questions, engage with their stories, and show empathy where needed.
People can tell when you’re genuinely interested in them, and it helps build rapport almost instantly.
Here’s the next habit to let go: feigning interest or not showing any at all. True engagement is key.
3) Neglecting the power of positivity
Willie Nelson once said, “Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.”
This quote always resonates with me, particularly when thinking about how we interact with others.
Our attitude can make or break a budding relationship.
If you’re constantly focusing on the negatives, complaining, or criticizing, it can make it tough for people to want to be around you.
I’ll be the first to admit that it’s not always easy to maintain a positive outlook, especially when life throws curveballs our way.
But here’s the thing: positivity is infectious.
People are naturally drawn to those who are positive and upbeat.
Even if you’re not feeling 100% cheerful, simply focusing on the positive aspects of a conversation or situation can have a significant impact on how others perceive you.
If you’re looking to get on somebody’s good side almost immediately, it’s time to say goodbye to constant negativity and embrace a more positive outlook.
4) Overlooking the magic of small gestures
In the world of social psychology, there’s a concept called the ‘Ben Franklin Effect’.
It’s based on a simple idea: if you want to get someone to like you, ask them to do you a favor.
Sounds counterintuitive, right?
Well, it’s backed by research. When someone does a favor for you, their brain rationalizes that they must like you enough to have helped you.
Now, I’m not suggesting you start asking everyone for favors left and right.
But it highlights something important: our interactions with others aren’t just about what we say or how we say it.
It’s also about the small gestures we make towards others.
A simple ‘thank you’, remembering someone’s name, or showing appreciation for their help can go a long way in increasing your likability.
If you want to get on somebody’s good side almost immediately, don’t underestimate the power of these small but meaningful actions.
5) Ignoring the importance of body language
We’ve talked about conversations and attitudes, but there’s another crucial aspect to consider: body language.
Even when we’re not saying a word, we’re communicating. Our stance, our facial expressions, even the way we use our hands while talking – it all sends a message.
And it’s not just about how you present yourself. Paying attention to someone else’s body language can also be a game-changer.
For instance, if someone crosses their arms during a conversation, they might be feeling defensive or uncomfortable.
Adjusting your approach accordingly can help put them at ease.
On the flip side, maintaining eye contact and nodding when someone is speaking can show that you’re engaged and interested in what they’re saying.
Hoping to get on someone’s good side almost immediately? Don’t neglect the role of body language.
It’s a silent but powerful tool in your interaction toolkit.
6) Forgetting to be yourself
We’ve covered a lot of ground on habits to drop if you want to get on someone’s good side quickly.
But there’s one more thing that’s crucial to remember: authenticity.
Amid all these tips and techniques, it’s easy to lose sight of the most important thing—being yourself.
People can sense when you’re trying too hard or being someone you’re not, and it can make them feel uneasy.
While it’s essential to be mindful of our actions and behaviors, it’s equally important to stay true to who we are.
Think about it: the best relationships, whether personal or professional, are built on authenticity.
While you’re saying goodbye to certain habits, make sure you’re not saying goodbye to your true self.
Remember, getting on someone’s good side almost immediately doesn’t mean morphing into what you think they want.
It means being the best, most genuine version of yourself.
7) Dismissing the value of patience
You’ve mastered the art of conversation, started showing genuine interest, embraced positivity, appreciated small gestures, paid attention to body language, and stayed true to yourself.
But there’s still one more piece to the puzzle: patience.
In our fast-paced world, we often want immediate results. We want to win people over right away, but building meaningful relationships takes time.
Expecting instant connections can lead to disappointment and can even push people away.
It’s essential to understand that everyone is different. Some people may warm up to you quickly, while others might take a bit longer.
The key lies in being patient and giving the relationship time to grow naturally.
Bear in mind, if you’re looking to get on someone’s good side almost immediately, remember that sometimes, a little patience can go a long way.
8) Neglecting empathy
We’ve talked about a lot of habits and behaviors, but there’s one that stands out as the most crucial: empathy.
Understanding and sharing the feelings of another person is the cornerstone of any successful relationship.
It’s not just about being a good listener or showing interest. It’s about being able to put yourself in their shoes, to see their perspective, and to respond with kindness and understanding.
Empathy allows us to connect with others on a deeper level. It shows that we value them, that we care about their experiences and feelings.
And in turn, it makes us more likable, more approachable, more… well, human.
Make empathy your superpower. It’s not just a habit; it’s a way of life.
Wrapping up
Shifting habits can seem like a daunting task. But remember, every journey begins with a single step.
You’ve now acknowledged the habits that might be standing in the way of you making immediate connections with others.
It’s time to bid them goodbye, but not without understanding the value they once served.
As you begin this journey toward change, take it one day at a time, one habit at a time.
Observe when these habits show up and gently steer yourself towards a different response.
Embrace the discomfort that comes with change – it’s a sign that you’re growing.
And most importantly, be patient with yourself. Changing long-standing habits takes time and consistency.
As the renowned psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
In your quest to get on somebody’s good side almost immediately, don’t forget to be kind to yourself first.
You’re on your way to creating more meaningful connections and a more authentic you.