The people we surround ourselves with play a significant role in shaping our happiness, growth, and overall quality of life.

Attracting high-character individuals into your circle requires self-reflection and a willingness to let go of behaviors that may unknowingly push them away.

As we age, these shifts become even more important for building meaningful, lasting connections.

In this article, we’ll explore the seven behaviors to leave behind if you want to welcome more high-character people into your life:

1) Dishonesty

Reflect on your interactions right now: You may find that you sometimes tell white lies or embellish the truth.

We all do it as it’s a societal norm to occasionally twist the truth to avoid hurting feelings or to make ourselves look better.

However, let’s acknowledge something fundamental about becoming a high-character individual: Honesty is non-negotiable.

It’s crucial to dismiss the illusion that white lies are harmless—they aren’t.

Your actions speak, and they resonate loudest when they’re rooted in truth and authenticity. When you act honestly.

If you can cease relying on half-truths and start cultivating transparency in your life, your character will become evident from your actions.

You won’t need to pretend or put on a facade.

2) Avoiding discomfort

This understanding evolved for me from my interaction with a life mentor.

Guidance on personal growth often suggests “staying in your comfort zone” or “avoiding unnecessary stress.”

While this is frequently preached, it’s not the pathway to attracting high-character individuals.

Instead, personal growth stems from willingly stepping into discomfort.

When you try to avoid discomfort all the time, you give too much power to your comfort zone.

In turn, you inhibit your growth potential.

3) Constant criticism

It’s not uncommon to find oneself indulging in minor criticisms or negative observations about others. It’s an easy trap to fall into.

Here’s the thing: If you want to attract high-character individuals as you grow older, it’s crucial to acknowledge that constant criticism is counterproductive.

You’re functioning in a negative space.

It’s vital to let go of the habit of criticism that comes from believing your negative observations about others are always justified.

Your words have impact, and they are most potent when they stem from a place of understanding and empathy. When you speak constructively.

If you can stop banking on criticism and start fostering a habit of understanding in your life, the quality of your relationships will become obvious from your interactions.

4) Impatience

I began this section by focusing on honesty and embracing discomfort.

Honesty and embracing discomfort also shape how we treat time and patience.

In my own experience, I found myself chasing after goals as I felt the urge to achieve the next milestone in my personal growth.

My intentions were noble—personal growth had the potential to make me a better person—but when I got so focused on reaching my goals, I slipped into the habit of thinking that my progress was more important than the process.

I lost sight of the present moment and became anxious—if only I judged myself for my intentions, I wouldn’t have question my impatience.

With that, I was able to reflect on my actions and change how I behaved by reminding myself to slow down and appreciate the journey of life.

Nurturing patience is what matters, not just the intentions that drive your behavior.

5) Practicing apathy

Years ago, I found myself in a heated argument with a close friend.

The issue was trivial, but our egos were on the line.

In the heat of the moment, I was more focused on winning the argument than understanding my friend’s perspective—I believed I was standing up for my viewpoint.

But in the process, I overlooked one crucial thing: Empathy.

I was so engrossed in making my point that I failed to consider my friend’s feelings and point of view.

I apologized to my friend soon after, restoring the bond we once had.

From that day forward, I made a conscious effort to practice empathy in all my interactions.

6) Lack of self-awareness

Psychological studies suggest that self-awareness plays a crucial role in personal development and forming meaningful relationships.

It acts as a cornerstone for emotional intelligence, influencing how we perceive ourselves and how we relate to others.

This knowledge prompts us to reflect on our actions, to understand our patterns, and to value the insights gained through self-reflection.

For those seeking high-character individuals, cultivating self-awareness can provide a sense of clarity.

It’s a reminder that we are not just shaped by external influences, but also by our internal dialogue and perceptions.

Valuing self-awareness encourages us to see our journey as part of a larger personal narrative and can provide a sense of purpose and direction.

7) Focusing on imperfections

In our pursuit of attracting high-character individuals, we often set high standards for ourselves.

We strive for perfection in our actions, words, and thoughts. We believe that by being perfect, we will become more attractive to others.

However, perfection is a myth.

It’s not only unattainable but also creates an unrealistic expectation that can lead to self-criticism and dissatisfaction.

Acknowledging and accepting our imperfections doesn’t mean settling for mediocrity.

Instead, it means understanding our flaws as integral parts of our character, parts that make us uniquely human.

For those seeking genuine connections, embracing imperfections can lead to more authentic relationships.

It’s a revelation that our flaws are not hindrances but aspects that can foster deeper connections with high-character individuals.

In conclusion: It could be evolutionary

The complexities of human behavior and connection have profound links with our evolutionary past.

Whether it’s practicing patience, valuing honesty, embracing discomfort or any of the other behaviors we’ve discussed, the underlying evolutionary instinct might be enhancing our capacity for meaningful connections.

As we say goodbye to behaviors that don’t serve us and cultivate those that do, we’re not just improving our own lives, but also contributing to the collective growth of our communities.

In this ongoing journey of personal development, remember that every step towards becoming a better version of ourselves is a step towards attracting high-character individuals into our lives!