If someone brings up these 8 topics in a conversation, they’re probably highly self-centered

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | April 2, 2025, 9:40 pm

If someone constantly talks about their latest achievements, you can bet they’re self-centered. If they never stop discussing their problems, it’s a safe guess they’re pretty self-absorbed.

That’s the gist of figuring out people’s personalities.

But, to be fair, unraveling the human psyche isn’t always a piece of cake. It needs an extra dose of patience and keen observation, especially when you’re dealing with self-centered individuals.

Now, you might be wondering: how can I spot a self-obsessed person without getting a psychology degree? Well, if they steer the conversation towards these 8 specific topics, you’ve got your answer.

So, buckle up and prepare to delve into the world of self-centeredness!

1) Their personal achievements

Let’s start with the most obvious one.

If someone can’t stop talking about their latest accomplishment, their new car, or their fantastic vacation, it’s a clear sign that they might be self-centered. They’re so caught up in their own world that they forget that conversation is a two-way street.

For these individuals, every chat is a golden opportunity to narrate their own chronicles of success. You might be discussing climate change, and suddenly they’re talking about how they aced their geography quiz back in high school.

But remember, it’s not just about them bragging about their triumphs. It could be more subtle like them always steering the conversation back to their personal experiences. It’s all about them – their story, their viewpoint, their life.

Next time you find yourself trapped in a one-sided conversation, take note. You may just be dealing with a highly self-centered person.

2) Their problems

Now, this one really gets to me.

I remember having a conversation with a friend a while back. I was going through a rough patch and wanted to share my feelings. But the moment I brought up my issues, she instantly shifted the focus back onto her. It was as if my problems were a trigger for her to discuss her own.

You see, self-centered individuals have this knack for making every conversation about them, even when it’s about your problems. They might nod sympathetically, but before you know it, they’re offloading their issues onto you, making you feel like a mere sounding board for their woes.

If someone always turns the spotlight back onto their problems, no matter what the original topic was, they’re likely highly self-centered. And trust me, it can be emotionally draining to deal with such people.

3) Their physical appearance

You know how peacocks flaunt their beautiful feathers to attract a mate? Humans aren’t much different, especially those who are self-centered. They have this irresistible urge to discuss, in great detail, their physical appearance.

From their new hairstyle to their gym routine, every little change becomes a major discussion point. They’re always fishing for compliments, seeking validation for their looks. It’s like they’re perpetually standing in front of a mirror, admiring their reflection.

But it goes beyond just fishing for compliments. Studies show that people who frequently discuss their physical appearance may be exhibiting traits of narcissism, a personality disorder associated with excessive self-centeredness.

Keep an ear out for those who can’t stop talking about their looks – they might just be more self-focused than you thought.

4) Their future plans

Planning for the future is important, no doubt. But when someone spends more time discussing their five-year plan than asking about your day, it might be a red flag.

Self-centered individuals are notorious for their endless monologues about their future dreams, goals, and aspirations. They’re so engrossed in painting a picture of their envisioned future that they often forget to include others in their narrative.

It’s not just about sharing aspirations; it’s about them not showing any interest in your plans or ambitions. It’s like they’re the only character in their life story, and everyone else is just a supporting actor.

If the conversation always drifts towards their future plans without considering yours, you might be dealing with a self-centered person.

5) Their past

Now, here’s something I’ve noticed over the years.

Self-centered individuals have this unique ability to turn any conversation into a history lesson about their life. You might be talking about a new movie, and suddenly they’re reminiscing about that time in high school when they starred in a play.

It’s as if they’re stuck in a nostalgic loop, constantly talking about their past experiences, achievements, or even mistakes. And the thing is, they often narrate these stories with an air of grandiosity, as if they’re the protagonist of an epic saga.

I’ve had my fair share of interactions with such people, and let me tell you, it can be quite exhausting. It’s like you’re a captive audience to their life story, with no room for your own experiences or thoughts.

6) Their relationships

Now, this might surprise you.

You’d think that someone who talks about their relationships a lot is a people person, right? Well, it’s not always the case. In fact, self-centered people often discuss their relationships extensively, but with a twist.

Instead of focusing on the other person in the relationship, they focus on how that person impacts them. They talk about what they’re getting out of the relationship, how they feel, and what they think – leaving little to no room for the other person’s perspective.

Now, if someone always talks about their relationships from a self-centric viewpoint, it’s quite likely they are highly self-centered.

7) Their possessions

Ever met someone who can’t stop talking about their brand-new gadget or their luxurious apartment? That’s another classic sign of self-centeredness.

For these individuals, possessions aren’t just belongings; they’re extensions of themselves. They often take immense pride in what they own and don’t miss an opportunity to flaunt their material wealth.

They might steer the conversation towards their new designer watch or the latest addition to their car collection. It’s like they’re living in their own little world, where material possessions are the ultimate status symbol.

If the topic of conversation frequently turns to someone’s possessions, you might be dealing with a self-centered person.

8) Themselves

At the end of the day, the most telling sign of a self-centered person is their incessant need to talk about themselves.

They’re always the hero of their stories, the victim of their tragedies, and the star of their successes.

It’s as if they live in a bubble where they are the center of the universe, and everything else just revolves around them.

If someone consistently brings themselves up in conversation, regardless of the topic at hand, there’s a good chance they’re highly self-centered.

Final thoughts

If you’ve made it this far, I hope you’ve gained some insight into the world of self-centered people.

Being self-centered isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s a survival mechanism that we all have to some degree. The problem arises when it becomes excessive and starts to overshadow the essence of genuine conversation – connection and understanding.

In the words of Stephen R. Covey, “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” If someone always brings up these 8 topics in a conversation, they’re probably listening with the intent to reply, not understand.

Next time you engage in a conversation, pay attention to what is being discussed. Is it about understanding and connecting, or is it just another stage for someone’s self-centered monologue?

It’s food for thought – something worth pondering over. After all, conversations are the building blocks of relationships, and knowing what to look out for can make all the difference.