There’s a vast gap between being a great communicator and a not-so-great one. The difference? It’s all about the topics they choose to bring up.

A low-quality communicator often brings up certain subjects that can cause discomfort, confusion, or even outright conflict. They might not even realize they’re doing it, but the impact on the conversation is undeniable.

Now, I’m not saying we should avoid difficult topics altogether. However, good communication involves knowing when and how to approach these subjects – if at all.

So, what are these conversation red flags? What are the topics that make someone a low-quality communicator? In this article, I’ll reveal the seven telltale signs to watch out for in your everyday interactions.

Let’s dive in and learn how to elevate our communication game.

1) They’re fixated on gossip

You know the type. They’re always eager to share the latest scandalous tidbit about someone else’s life. The problem is, conversations that revolve around gossip rarely lead to anything productive or positive.

Gossiping can quickly create a negative atmosphere. It’s all about discussing other people’s problems, usually without any intention of providing help or solutions. More often than not, it’s just a means of passing judgment or creating drama.

Now, there’s a difference between sharing news about mutual friends and outright gossiping. The latter involves spreading rumors, personal details, or negative information which might not even be true.

When someone constantly brings up gossip in a conversation, it could be a sign that they’re a low-quality communicator. They might be more interested in stirring the pot than having meaningful and respectful discussions.

Good communication involves mutual respect and understanding, not tearing others down behind their backs.

2) They always steer towards negativity

Ever had a conversation with someone who seems to have a dark cloud constantly hanging over their head? I remember having a colleague like this once. Every morning meeting, regardless of the topic, he’d somehow manage to twist the conversation towards something negative.

Whether it was criticizing management decisions, complaining about the workload, or predicting doom and gloom for the company’s future, he was a master at turning any discussion into a pessimistic rant.

The problem with this is that it not only brings everyone’s mood down but also discourages open and constructive communication. It’s hard to share ideas or voice opinions when you’re constantly met with negative reactions.

If someone always steers conversations towards negativity, it can be an indication of their low-quality communication skills.

High-quality communicators can discuss challenges without spreading negativity or discouraging others from contributing to the conversation.

3) They frequently interrupt others

It’s an unfortunate reality that many of us have been guilty of at some point – interrupting someone mid-sentence.

This habit, while sometimes unintentional, can disrupt the flow of conversation and show a lack of respect for the speaker.

Studies have shown that frequent interruptions can lead to frustration, decreased productivity, and even impact the overall quality of decision-making processes within a group.

When someone consistently interrupts others in a conversation, it’s a sign of low-quality communication. They might be more focused on getting their point across than actually listening to what others have to say.

High-quality communicators understand the importance of active listening. They know that giving others the space to express their thoughts fully can lead to more effective communication and better overall outcomes.

4) They keep on bragging about themselves

We’ve all come across someone who can’t seem to stop talking about themselves. They’re always ready with an anecdote about their accomplishments, or eager to share how much they know or how good they are at something.

While it’s perfectly fine to share personal achievements and experiences, there’s a fine line between sharing and bragging.

Bragging can quickly become tiresome and off-putting for the listener. It can make the conversation one-sided and create a sense of imbalance in the interaction.

If a person constantly brings up their own achievements or qualities in a conversation, it could be a warning sign of low-quality communication.

High-quality communicators understand the importance of balance in a conversation. They know that it’s just as important to listen, show interest in others, and acknowledge their accomplishments and viewpoints.

5) They avoid eye contact

I’ve been in plenty of conversations where the other person seemed more interested in their phone, or the ceiling, or just about anything else other than looking me in the eyes. It’s an uncomfortable feeling and makes the conversation feel disconnected and impersonal.

Eye contact is a key part of effective communication. It helps to build trust and show that you’re engaged in the conversation. It’s a non-verbal cue that says, “I’m here, I’m listening, and I value what you have to say.”

If someone consistently avoids eye contact during a conversation, they might not be a high-quality communicator. It could indicate that they’re not fully engaged in the conversation or that they’re not interested in what you have to say.

On the flip side, maintaining good eye contact can help to improve your communication skills and build stronger connections with others.

6) They use offensive or inappropriate language

Language is a powerful tool. It can build bridges, tear them down, or even set them on fire. A person who frequently uses offensive or inappropriate language in conversation can create an uncomfortable environment for others.

It’s not just about taboo words or slurs, either. It could be inappropriate jokes, belittling comments, or even subtle digs that are designed to undermine or hurt.

These tactics are often used to gain power or control over a conversation, but they do nothing to foster understanding or respect.

If someone consistently uses offensive or inappropriate language, it’s a clear sign of low-quality communication. Good communicators understand the power of words and choose them carefully to build understanding and respect, not to cause harm or discomfort.

7) They don’t ask questions

Questions are the lifeblood of a good conversation.

They show interest, foster understanding, and promote deeper connections. If someone doesn’t ask questions in a conversation, it’s a strong indicator that they might not be a high-quality communicator.

Conversations should be a two-way street. It’s not just about sharing your own thoughts and opinions, but also about showing genuine interest in the other person’s perspective.

By asking questions, we open up the conversation and give the other person a chance to share their thoughts and ideas.

Without questions, a conversation can quickly become a monologue. So if you notice someone rarely asks questions during your interactions, it could signal that they’re more focused on themselves than on building a meaningful dialogue with you.

Wrapping up: It’s all about progress

At the end of the day, communication is a skill, and like any skill, it can be improved over time.

We’re all human, and we’ve probably all stumbled into one or more of these communication pitfalls at some point. The key is to recognize these habits, understand their impact, and strive for better.

Remember, high-quality communication is not about perfection but progress. It’s about fostering understanding, building connections, and creating an environment where everyone feels heard and valued.

Improving our communication skills can lead to better relationships, more productive conversations, and a deeper understanding of others. And who knows? You might even discover a thing or two about yourself along the way.

So as we navigate through our daily conversations, let’s strive to be high-quality communicators – for ourselves and for those around us. Because in the grand tapestry of human interaction, every thread matters.