Life has a way of knocking us down when we least expect it.

I’ve had my fair share of setbacks—failed projects, broken relationships, moments where I felt completely lost.

In those times, I wondered how some people seemed to bounce back stronger while I struggled to move forward.

As a psychology enthusiast, I’ve spent years diving into what makes certain people more resilient than others.

And the truth is, resilience isn’t some magical trait you’re born with—it’s built through habits and mindset shifts that anyone can develop.

In this article, I’ll share seven powerful habits of resilient people, backed by psychology, that help them overcome challenges and come out even stronger.

Let’s dive in.

1) They accept what they can’t control

One of the biggest differences between resilient people and those who struggle to move on after setbacks is acceptance.

For years, I fought against reality. When things didn’t go my way, I resisted, overanalyzed, and obsessed over how unfair life was. But all that did was drain my energy and keep me stuck.

Psychologists call this radical acceptance—acknowledging a situation for what it is, without trying to change or fight it.

This doesn’t mean you have to like it, but accepting reality frees up mental space to focus on what you can control: your response, your next steps, your mindset.

A simple way to practice this? Next time you find yourself stressing over something outside your control, take a deep breath and ask yourself: Is there anything I can realistically do about this right now?

If not, remind yourself that resistance only creates more suffering. Let go, and redirect your energy toward what actually moves you forward.

2) They reframe setbacks as opportunities to grow

A few years ago, I poured everything into a project that completely flopped. I had spent months working on it, convinced it was going to be a success—but in the end, it failed miserably.

At first, I felt like a failure, like I had wasted all that time for nothing.

But then I came across a quote from psychologist Carol Dweck, who pioneered the concept of the growth mindset: “In a growth mindset, challenges are exciting rather than threatening.

So rather than thinking, ‘Oh, I’m going to reveal my weaknesses,’ you say, ‘Wow, here’s a chance to grow.’”

That shift in perspective changed everything for me. Instead of seeing failure as proof that I wasn’t good enough, I started asking myself: What can I learn from this? How can I use this experience to improve?

Resilient people don’t see setbacks as the end of the road—they see them as stepping stones. Every failure carries a lesson, but only if you’re willing to look for it.

If you’re struggling with a setback right now, try reframing it: What skills did you gain? What would you do differently next time? That simple shift in mindset can turn any failure into fuel for future success.

3) They lean on their support system

For a long time, I thought resilience meant handling everything on my own. Whenever life knocked me down, I kept my struggles to myself, convinced that asking for help was a sign of weakness.

But after one particularly rough period—when I lost a job and went through a painful breakup at the same time—I finally opened up to a close friend.

Instead of judging me, he listened. He reminded me that setbacks don’t define me and that I wasn’t alone. That conversation didn’t magically fix everything, but it gave me the strength to keep going.

Psychologists have found that strong social connections are one of the biggest predictors of resilience.

Research shows that people who have supportive friends, family, or mentors recover from setbacks faster and experience less emotional distress. Simply knowing that someone has your back can make all the difference.

If you’re going through a tough time, don’t isolate yourself. Reach out to someone you trust—whether it’s a friend, a family member, or even a therapist. Resilient people understand that strength isn’t about doing it all alone; it’s about knowing when to lean on others.

4) They practice self-compassion instead of self-criticism

After a major setback, my default response used to be brutal self-criticism. I’d replay my mistakes over and over, telling myself I wasn’t good enough or that I had completely ruined my chances of success.

But then I came across research by Dr. Kristin Neff, a leading expert on self-compassion, which showed that people who treat themselves with kindness during difficult times are actually more resilient—not less.

In one study, Neff and her colleagues found that individuals who practiced self-compassion after failure were more motivated to improve and less likely to dwell on their mistakes.

That changed everything for me. Instead of beating myself up, I started asking: If a friend were in my position, what would I say to them? That simple shift helped me replace harsh self-talk with encouragement and perspective.

Resilient people don’t tear themselves down when things go wrong—they lift themselves up.

The next time you catch yourself being overly critical after a setback, pause and show yourself the same kindness you would offer a loved one. It won’t erase the setback, but it will help you move forward with strength instead of shame.

5) They focus on what they can control

A few years ago, I found myself stuck in a situation I couldn’t change. A business deal I had been counting on fell through at the last minute, and I wasted weeks stressing over what went wrong.

I kept replaying the situation in my head, wishing things had gone differently, but no amount of overthinking could undo what had happened.

Then I came across a simple but powerful idea: resilient people focus their energy on what they can control instead of obsessing over what they can’t.

Psychologists call this having an internal locus of control—the belief that your actions influence your outcomes.

Studies show that people with this mindset are not only more resilient but also experience lower stress and greater success in life. Instead of feeling powerless, they channel their energy into solutions and next steps.

After that failed deal, I forced myself to shift my focus. I asked: What’s still within my control? Instead of dwelling on the loss, I used the time to strengthen other parts of my business.

A few months later, a new opportunity came along—one that wouldn’t have been possible if I had stayed stuck in frustration.

The next time you face a setback, try this: Make a list of what’s within your control and take action on just one small thing. Shifting your focus from what’s lost to what’s possible is one of the most powerful ways to build resilience.

6) They find meaning in their struggles

A few years ago, I went through one of the toughest periods of my life.

Everything seemed to fall apart at once—my career felt stagnant, a relationship ended badly, and I was struggling to find direction. At the time, it just felt like suffering for no reason.

But looking back, that difficult period shaped me in ways I couldn’t see at the time. It pushed me to reevaluate what I truly wanted in life and led me to start pursuing my passion, something that has given me purpose ever since.

Psychologist Viktor Frankl, who survived the horrors of concentration camps and later wrote Man’s Search for Meaning, famously said: “In some ways suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning.”

Resilient people don’t just endure hardships—they look for meaning in them. They ask: What can this teach me? How can this experience make me stronger?

Instead of seeing struggles as pointless setbacks, they use them as stepping stones for growth.

If you’re going through a tough time right now, try shifting your perspective. It may not make the pain disappear, but finding even a small sense of purpose in your struggles can help you move forward with strength and resilience.

7) They take breaks instead of pushing through

It might sound counterintuitive, but one of the most powerful habits of resilient people isn’t working harder—it’s knowing when to step back.

For the longest time, I believed that the only way to overcome setbacks was to power through them. When things went wrong, I would double down on my efforts, refusing to take a break until I “fixed” everything.

But instead of making progress, I just burned myself out.

Then I learned that research shows rest isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s essential for resilience.

A study published in The Journal of Applied Psychology found that people who take intentional breaks, whether short pauses during the day or longer periods of recovery, are better at managing stress and bouncing back from challenges.

Resilient people understand that recovery is part of the process. They step back, reset, and return with more clarity and energy.

Try this: The next time you feel overwhelmed by a setback, resist the urge to push through.

Take a walk, get some sleep, or do something completely unrelated to the problem at hand. Giving your mind space can help you come back stronger—and often, the solution becomes clearer once you stop forcing it.

Final thoughts

Resilience isn’t about never struggling—it’s about how you respond when life knocks you down.

The good news? It’s a skill you can build. By shifting your mindset, leaning on others, and taking care of yourself, you can bounce back stronger from any setback.

Here’s something practical to try right now: Think about a recent challenge you faced. Which of these seven habits could have helped you navigate it better? Pick one and start applying it today.

Small changes add up, and over time, you’ll find yourself handling setbacks with more confidence, strength, and clarity.